On Sat, 14 May 2005 14:00:08 GMT, Rosalie B. wrote:

We all are. g

HEY!!

I'm not. I'm married to one of those taciturn type men who wants me
to be in the cockpit but not talk.
-----

JR Gilbreath wrote:

wrote:
Having lost objects overboard in waves, I know how easy it is to really
lose track of them, really scary. SO, we wear harnesses and tie them
to eyes in the cockpit. Still, if I fell overboard even wearing the
harness, he would have a very difficult time of it.

So practice this. It is one of the skills one should know anyway.

I love my wife but have learned I cannot sail with her. It is worse
than being single handed. Imagine being single handed while constantly
tending apparent disasters and being subjected to constant jabbering.
When I sail with her, I feel so stressed out I cannot handle it.

MY GOD! We are married to the same woman!

I suspect that part of this is lack of knowledge and a feeling of
being out of control. IMHO it would help your wives to take a sailing
course without you. That's what I did on the recommendation of my
sister. Not one of those women's courses, although I guess those can
be good too.

Not that I don't think my husband would be a bad instructor, but it
was reassuring that he was telling me the same thing as an unrelated
other person was telling me.

Just be sure that whatever course it is makes each student perform all
the maneuvers, and not get out of it by playing helpless or scared or
whatever.


grandma Rosalie

I agree Rosalie...how the data is presented, and who presents it can make
all the difference in the world. I was with a sailing class whose crew consisted,
in part, of a younger woman and her older husband. The woman had never
been even close to the water before, and the first time the boat heeled, she nearly
came unglued. Her husband would roll his eyes and make snide/irritable remarks
every time she make a mistake however small, even though he knew squat about boats too..

The second morning the instructor left me on the helm, plus a 14 year old young man to handle the sheets,
and the woman on deck, while he took the other two students (including the husband)
below to play with the radar and GPS. I put the woman on the wheel, stood close behind her, and
talked softly almost in her ear. I explained what we were going to do, what the boat would
feel like, etc, and led her through several tacks with a very quiet running commentary.
If it went pear shaped, I'd explain what happened and why it did, with no hint of
disapproval...then we'd try it again.

After awhile she relaxed and got a feel for the boat. By the end of the week, she was doing MOB
and other maneuvers, including docking, with a good degree of competence considering her
experience level. All it took was quiet encouragement to get her started.

The husband? He never did catch on to sailing (LOL...and I didn't expect a Christmas card from him)
....she was by far the better sailor than he at the end of the week. The instructor later confessed he
knew early on that unless he separated the man and his wife, she would have an absolutly
miserable week, and learn zip.

My two cents worth.
Norm B