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Them Liberal Blues.
Well, I was feelin' sad and feelin' blue,
I didn't know what in the world I was gonna do, Them Liberals they wus comin' around, They wus in the air, They wus on the ground. They wouldn't gimme no peace. . . So I run down most hurriedly And joined up with the Republican Party, I got me a membership card And started off a-walkin' down the road. Yee-hoo, I'm a real Republican now! Look out you Liberals! Now we all agree with Hitlers' views, Although he killed six million Jews. It don't matter too much that he was a Fascist, At least you can't say he was a Liberal! That's to say like if you got a cold you take a shot of malaria. Well, I wus lookin' everywhere for them gol-darned Liberals. I got up in the mornin' 'n' looked under my bed, Looked in the sink, behind the door, Looked in the glove compartment of my car. Couldn't find 'em . . . I wus lookin' high an' low for them Liberals everywhere, I wus lookin' in the sink an' underneath the chair. I looked way up my chimney hole, I even looked deep inside my toilet bowl. They got away . . . Well, I wus sittin' home alone an' started to sweat, Figured they wus in my T.V. set. Peeked behind the picture frame, Got a shock from my feet, hittin' right up in the brain. Them Liberals caused it! I know they did . . . them hard-core ones. Well, I quit my job so I could work alone, Then I changed my name to Sherlock Holmes. Followed some clues from my detective bag And discovered they wus red stripes on the American flag! That ol' Betty Ross . . . Well, I investigated all the books in the library, Ninety percent of 'em gotta be burned away. I investigated all the people that I knowed, Ninety-eight percent of them gotta go. The other two percent are fellow Republicans . . . just like me. Now Eisenhower, he's a Liberal spy, Lincoln, Jefferson and that Clinton guy. To my knowledge there's just one man That's really a true American: Rush Limbaugh I know for a fact he hates Liberals cause he picketed the movie Exodus. Well, I fin'ly started thinkin' straight When I run outa things to investigate. Couldn't imagine doin' anything else, So now I'm sittin' home investigatin' myself! Hope I don't find out anything . . . hmm, great God! Apologies to Bob D. -- * * * email sent to will *never* get to me. |
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