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#1
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Boats, friends, cash and gas
Hello Group,
I have a friend who I take out on my boat very often fishing. Grant it, it is a small boat 16' 6". But it still runs on fuel. He never has offered to pay for fuel or help to wash all the crude out of it from fishing. I did invite him to go so I do not feel right asking him. For example yesterday we went fishing at small lake. I drove my truck, towing my boat 140+ miles round trip, used 6 gallons of fuel on the lake. I know that is not a lot since some people here have boats that use 6 gallons just to start. But, he could offer. Another example last year we went to Canada for a "guys" week. We used 60-70 gallons of fuel running around a much bigger lake (Bobs Lake if anyone knows where that is) that week. That is not including the 70-80 gallons to get there and back. He did not offer cash for gas. But, he did pay his share of the house and food. My brother and his friend shared a boat that week and split everything 50/50 and made comments about sharing the cost in front of my friend. But, he was still clueless. My brother's father in-law has a boat at the Jersey shore. When he invites me down, even though he has more money than I will ever see, I offer and intend to pay part of the $100-150 fuel bill. But he always refuses. But I always offer. Does anyone have or has had this issue? What did you or are you going do? Paul |
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#2
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Boats, friends, cash and gas
Correction on line 4: "afford".
"Lu Powell" wrote in message news:V%zYa.91257$o%2.40953@sccrnsc02... Had a neighbor like that. Invited him to go fishing once. Never asked him again. His wife asked if I was mad at him. I told her no, just that I couldn't afforded him. He had shortest arms and deepest pockets in the county. "Paul Dougherty" wrote in message om... Hello Group, I have a friend who I take out on my boat very often fishing. Grant it, it is a small boat 16' 6". But it still runs on fuel. He never has offered to pay for fuel or help to wash all the crude out of it from fishing. I did invite him to go so I do not feel right asking him. For example yesterday we went fishing at small lake. I drove my truck, towing my boat 140+ miles round trip, used 6 gallons of fuel on the lake. I know that is not a lot since some people here have boats that use 6 gallons just to start. But, he could offer. Another example last year we went to Canada for a "guys" week. We used 60-70 gallons of fuel running around a much bigger lake (Bobs Lake if anyone knows where that is) that week. That is not including the 70-80 gallons to get there and back. He did not offer cash for gas. But, he did pay his share of the house and food. My brother and his friend shared a boat that week and split everything 50/50 and made comments about sharing the cost in front of my friend. But, he was still clueless. My brother's father in-law has a boat at the Jersey shore. When he invites me down, even though he has more money than I will ever see, I offer and intend to pay part of the $100-150 fuel bill. But he always refuses. But I always offer. Does anyone have or has had this issue? What did you or are you going do? Paul |
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#3
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Boats, friends, cash and gas
"Paul Dougherty" wrote in message om... Hello Group, I have a friend who I take out on my boat very often fishing. Grant it, it is a small boat 16' 6". But it still runs on fuel. He never has offered to pay for fuel or help to wash all the crude out of it from fishing. I did invite him to go so I do not feel right asking him. I invite people aboard my boats for a days fishing - nobody invites themselves. If they or their friends offer gas money, I always turn them down, but it is noted and they always get another invite to go. I go with one guy who takes care of all the rigging and unrigging when we make a run - his idea is that if I won't take money, maybe I'll take the labor. Some of the guys I ask don't have the money to pay for a day on the water, but they will bring fresh bait, etc. One guy's wife cuts up fresh veggies, fruits and stuffs a Playmate cooler with homemade iced tea for us to take. My feeling is if I offer, then it's like inviting somebody over for dinner - you don't expect them to bring something, but if they do, so much the better. I'm going fishing anyway - no skin off my nose. And in thinking about it, I don't think I've ever had somebody not offer to pay for gas or bring something to use like bait or food. Later, Tom |
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#4
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Boats, friends, cash and gas
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#5
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Boats, friends, cash and gas
All the time. If he is really your friend, there should be
no problem with you saying "I need you to pony up half the gas, dude; it costs me a lot, you know?" . If he is really your friend, and not a good time Skimpy, he will gladly put out. If he has a problem with it, for any reason, then you have a problem, and you know what it is. JR. Paul Doughty wrote: Hello Group, I have a friend who I take out on my boat very often fishing. Grant it, it is a small boat 16' 6". But it still runs on fuel. He never has offered to pay for fuel or help to wash all the crude out of it from fishing. I did invite him to go so I do not feel right asking him. For example yesterday we went fishing at small lake. I drove my truck, towing my boat 140+ miles round trip, used 6 gallons of fuel on the lake. I know that is not a lot since some people here have boats that use 6 gallons just to start. But, he could offer. Another example last year we went to Canada for a "guys" week. We used 60-70 gallons of fuel running around a much bigger lake (Bobs Lake if anyone knows where that is) that week. That is not including the 70-80 gallons to get there and back. He did not offer cash for gas. But, he did pay his share of the house and food. My brother and his friend shared a boat that week and split everything 50/50 and made comments about sharing the cost in front of my friend. But, he was still clueless. My brother's father in-law has a boat at the Jersey shore. When he invites me down, even though he has more money than I will ever see, I offer and intend to pay part of the $100-150 fuel bill. But he always refuses. But I always offer. Does anyone have or has had this issue? What did you or are you going do? Paul -- -------------------------------------------------------------- Home Page: http://www.seanet.com/~jasonrnorth |
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#6
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Boats, friends, cash and gas
My Opinions:
- Just because you invite someone does NOT mean you can't ask for gas / expenses money. You can ask for anything you want; it's your prerogative. It *is* like asking someone over for dinner...you can ask them to bring a dish or the wine if you want to. - It is NOT uncouth to ask for 1/2 of expenses. Even if they are paying half of the out of pocket expenses for the day you still have the investment in the boat, probably lots of upkeep, responsibility, etc., etc. - They can say "no" and/or not offer anything. That is perfectly fine; that is their prerogative. - If they choose not to offer anything do not be mad at them. Just dont' invite them if you don't like it. - If you KEEP inviting them when they don't pay then you have NO right to bitch about it. - If you don't ask for anything and they don't give anything you might think they "should" give something. But some people are shy in weird ways...My feeling is you should not be mad at them if you don't ASK for something. Maybe they honestly don't know and/or honestly don't want to offer something for fear it will offend you. People think weird things... ASK them for what you want. "Paul Dougherty" wrote in message om... Hello Group, I have a friend who I take out on my boat very often fishing. Grant it, it is a small boat 16' 6". But it still runs on fuel. He never has offered to pay for fuel or help to wash all the crude out of it from fishing. I did invite him to go so I do not feel right asking him. For example yesterday we went fishing at small lake. I drove my truck, towing my boat 140+ miles round trip, used 6 gallons of fuel on the lake. I know that is not a lot since some people here have boats that use 6 gallons just to start. But, he could offer. Another example last year we went to Canada for a "guys" week. We used 60-70 gallons of fuel running around a much bigger lake (Bobs Lake if anyone knows where that is) that week. That is not including the 70-80 gallons to get there and back. He did not offer cash for gas. But, he did pay his share of the house and food. My brother and his friend shared a boat that week and split everything 50/50 and made comments about sharing the cost in front of my friend. But, he was still clueless. My brother's father in-law has a boat at the Jersey shore. When he invites me down, even though he has more money than I will ever see, I offer and intend to pay part of the $100-150 fuel bill. But he always refuses. But I always offer. Does anyone have or has had this issue? What did you or are you going do? Paul |
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#7
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Boats, friends, cash and gas
Tough call but if you continually invite then it's your deal. I usually
decline with thanks, as I would be going out with or without a guest. I do however understand that an offer to help would be welcomed. Most people that don't own boats assume that 50 gallons of fuel doesn't last as long in a boat as it does in a civic "Paul Dougherty" wrote in message om... Hello Group, I have a friend who I take out on my boat very often fishing. Grant it, it is a small boat 16' 6". But it still runs on fuel. He never has offered to pay for fuel or help to wash all the crude out of it from fishing. I did invite him to go so I do not feel right asking him. For example yesterday we went fishing at small lake. I drove my truck, towing my boat 140+ miles round trip, used 6 gallons of fuel on the lake. I know that is not a lot since some people here have boats that use 6 gallons just to start. But, he could offer. Another example last year we went to Canada for a "guys" week. We used 60-70 gallons of fuel running around a much bigger lake (Bobs Lake if anyone knows where that is) that week. That is not including the 70-80 gallons to get there and back. He did not offer cash for gas. But, he did pay his share of the house and food. My brother and his friend shared a boat that week and split everything 50/50 and made comments about sharing the cost in front of my friend. But, he was still clueless. My brother's father in-law has a boat at the Jersey shore. When he invites me down, even though he has more money than I will ever see, I offer and intend to pay part of the $100-150 fuel bill. But he always refuses. But I always offer. Does anyone have or has had this issue? What did you or are you going do? Paul |
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#8
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Boats, friends, cash and gas
Right on, Andrew. I always stop on the way HOME for fuel too. If you wait
and do it on the way out, you're just postponing the fun and that's the whole point of this. I hate bringing my boat back without a full tank of gas. Also like yourself, I'll only invite a dead beat a couple of times. After they stand there about twice and let me pay for everything and do all the cleaning up, they don't get invited back. The ones that make the effort, at least offer to pay, get invited regularly. It's not just about boating, it's about courtesy. I almost said "common courtesy" there but it's not so common anymore. Charles "Andrew Krapcha" wrote in message ... I make it a point to keep my boat full of fuel. On the way home I stop and fill it again. Whoever was along for the ride gets to see that it is not cheap to operate (once they comment I will also be glad to list all the underlying cost IE: maint., oil...) they usually pitch in for fuel. If they don't, you don't have to feel obligated to invite them along again. Before I bought my own boat, I never went fishing with friends without forking over some cash. Unless you want to provide free entertainment, don't invite deadbeats. Personally, I feel it is **** poor to ride for free. Andy k. "Paul Dougherty" wrote in message om... Hello Group, I have a friend who I take out on my boat very often fishing. Grant it, it is a small boat 16' 6". But it still runs on fuel. He never has offered to pay for fuel or help to wash all the crude out of it from fishing. I did invite him to go so I do not feel right asking him. For example yesterday we went fishing at small lake. I drove my truck, towing my boat 140+ miles round trip, used 6 gallons of fuel on the lake. I know that is not a lot since some people here have boats that use 6 gallons just to start. But, he could offer. Another example last year we went to Canada for a "guys" week. We used 60-70 gallons of fuel running around a much bigger lake (Bobs Lake if anyone knows where that is) that week. That is not including the 70-80 gallons to get there and back. He did not offer cash for gas. But, he did pay his share of the house and food. My brother and his friend shared a boat that week and split everything 50/50 and made comments about sharing the cost in front of my friend. But, he was still clueless. My brother's father in-law has a boat at the Jersey shore. When he invites me down, even though he has more money than I will ever see, I offer and intend to pay part of the $100-150 fuel bill. But he always refuses. But I always offer. Does anyone have or has had this issue? What did you or are you going do? Paul |
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#9
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Boats, friends, cash and gas
Amazing. I have always paid for ALL of the gas, bait, food, beer, etc.
when I could get away with it. The boat owner is paying for the boat, trailer, taxes, registration(s), interest, maintenance, and the other endless expenses. Seems like a hell of a deal to me! A buddy of mine often used to take me fishing up north in his "walleye" boat. His kicker crapped out so I picked up a new one for less than $1000. This is maybe 3-4 boat payments. He was shocked but he was the one really shelling out the big money. Now that I have two boats, I have never expected any money but my friends, to this point, seem to have followed the same philosophy as me. I never give it much thought since it all works out in the end. Dan Paul Dougherty wrote: Hello Group, I have a friend who I take out on my boat very often fishing. Grant it, it is a small boat 16' 6". But it still runs on fuel. He never has offered to pay for fuel or help to wash all the crude out of it from fishing. I did invite him to go so I do not feel right asking him. For example yesterday we went fishing at small lake. I drove my truck, towing my boat 140+ miles round trip, used 6 gallons of fuel on the lake. I know that is not a lot since some people here have boats that use 6 gallons just to start. But, he could offer. Another example last year we went to Canada for a "guys" week. We used 60-70 gallons of fuel running around a much bigger lake (Bobs Lake if anyone knows where that is) that week. That is not including the 70-80 gallons to get there and back. He did not offer cash for gas. But, he did pay his share of the house and food. My brother and his friend shared a boat that week and split everything 50/50 and made comments about sharing the cost in front of my friend. But, he was still clueless. My brother's father in-law has a boat at the Jersey shore. When he invites me down, even though he has more money than I will ever see, I offer and intend to pay part of the $100-150 fuel bill. But he always refuses. But I always offer. Does anyone have or has had this issue? What did you or are you going do? Paul |
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#10
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Boats, friends, cash and gas
This has been an interesting thread, thanks for starting it.
Paul Dougherty wrote: Hello Group, I have a friend who I take out on my boat very often fishing. Grant it, it is a small boat 16' 6". But it still runs on fuel. He never has offered to pay for fuel or help to wash all the crude out of it from fishing. Your friend is either a dunce or a deadbeat. You and the other guys talked it over in front of him, right? He didn't offer a dime when everybody else chipped in, right? I've had several friends who were deadbeats. After noticing their pattern, and confirming it, I either quit doing things with them, or (if their company was worth it) only did things with them that the cost would not bother me. One of my best friends during and after college was a deadbeat... part of it was that he had been poor most of his life, and even after landing a good job could not bring himself to spend money (I think... we never talked about it and he's dead now). You have to decide for yourself whether to 1- stop inviting him or 2- discuss the issue with him with as much humor and grace as you can (preferably before inviting him again) or 3- just putting up with his deadbeat ways. Fresh Breezes- Doug King |
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