I need a cat like that. We have a dog problem in my neighborhood. Last time
I had a conversation with a dog owner about her animal digging in my garden,
the police showed up at my door. I'm not sure what the problem was, but I
suspect it was my comment: "Do you know what shark fishermen sometimes do
with the shark heads after they've butchered the sharks?" (In Montauk, they
used to hang them from the utility poles around the marinas). I think this
alarmed the dog owner. :-)

"Marshall Banana" wrote in message
...
Also Sprach Doug Kanter :
"Marshall Banana" wrote in message

Between the couch cushions. In our house, it's higly probable that the
cat could have eaten them.

That's some cat. Does it attack dogs? If so, can I rent it?

Actually, yeah, he does. Not necessarily successfully, but he HATES dogs,
and his flight-or-fight instincts seem to be permanantly wired to
fight. He's definitely not a wimpy cat, unlike his sister. I wasn't
kidding about eating the spools of fishing line either, he has a fetish
for any kind of stringy stuff. Wire, dental floss, fishing line, strips
of paper from the shredder, shoelaces, rubberbands, etc. all have to be
locked away.

Dan


--
Ah! How sweet coffee tastes! Lovelier than a thousand kisses, sweeter
far than muscatel wine! I must have coffee...

-- J. S. Bach

Doug Kanter wrote:
I need a cat like that. We have a dog problem in my neighborhood. Last time
I had a conversation with a dog owner about her animal digging in my garden,
the police showed up at my door.

You don't have a dog problem, you have a neighbor problem. The two
options I see are 1- get a bigger meaner dog (or a pet alligator) or 2-
make friends with the dog so that it will follow you willingly when you
put it in your trunk to take it to the local pound. If you are going to
'disappear' the dog, which is a good Stalinist solution to the problem,
then don't mention it to anybody and wait a couple weeks so it won't be
obvious.

Dogs can't help being dogs, but they shouldn't be allowed to run loose
where they're not wanted. For one thing, getting hit by a car is the
usual fate and it's rather painful & cruel.

DSK

"DSK" wrote in message
...
Doug Kanter wrote:
I need a cat like that. We have a dog problem in my neighborhood. Last
time
I had a conversation with a dog owner about her animal digging in my
garden,
the police showed up at my door.

You don't have a dog problem, you have a neighbor problem. The two
options I see are 1- get a bigger meaner dog (or a pet alligator) or 2-
make friends with the dog so that it will follow you willingly when you
put it in your trunk to take it to the local pound. If you are going to
'disappear' the dog, which is a good Stalinist solution to the problem,
then don't mention it to anybody and wait a couple weeks so it won't be
obvious.

Dogs can't help being dogs, but they shouldn't be allowed to run loose
where they're not wanted. For one thing, getting hit by a car is the
usual fate and it's rather painful & cruel.

Apparently, people can't help being people, either. Even the so-called "good
dog owners" are usually skanks who have no business living within miles of
other people. Example: I was out working in the garden once when a guy
stopped to let his dog crap on my lawn where it meets the street. He had the
equipment to pick it up afterwards, but as everyone knows, that doesn't
matter. Other dogs find those spots interesting because of the scent. So, I
politely asked him to not stop his dog on my property in the future. He said
he planned to clean it up. I said "Great, but even so, please don't stop
here any more". His next response was something like "That's some attitude
you have toward your neighors", to which I responded "Would it be OK with
you if I haul my trash cans down to your place and dump them on your lawn?"
He said "That's not the same". My final comment was "If you'd like to
continue having a dog, you'll not stop here in the future". He didn't. But,
why should anyone need to go through this hassle? He should've gotten right
to the correct response to my request: "Sure...no problem".

He's not the exception, either.

"I don't know how he gets out of my yard - really, I don't". (Hole in fence
big enough for a horse to walk through)

"You must be doing something to MAKE him want to visit your garden". (Right.
I grow steak bushes.)

"Oh come on....it's not THAT hard to clean doggy poo off your shoes. I do it
all the time." (A perfect example of coprophilia!)

We finally got a real dog catcher who behaves like a jack-booted thug. After
the legally required third complaint, he doesn't even knock on the dog
owner's door - he just takes the dog if he sees it, and sends them a letter
in the mail. Spooky. Nasty. Priceless. :-)

Strange, I thought you said you live in an apartment Doug,
IMO the biggest offenders to gardens are cats, my dog stays in his own
yard, fenced of course, and never goes in the garden, On the other hand
I have a neighbor that thinks its perfectly acceptable to let his cat
stay outside and use my vegtable garden as a litter box, First time I
trapped it I gave it back, 2nd time it went to the pound, This week I'll
be going for a 3rd time since I tilled my garden last week and its full
of cat crap again. Crab season is starting soon so I'll need fresh bait
anyway. Some people don't deserve having cats or dogs. UD



http://community.webtv.net/capuglyda...inUglyDansJack

I have lived in an apartment for the past 14 months. Before the divorce, a
house for 20 years. If my real estate agent is doing her job, I'll be back
in a house within 2 months. Meanwhile, the dog battle goes on. Had a garden
out behind the apt, and I'm TRYING to have a 20x20 space for the bbq &
picnic table in the meanwhile. Doesn't matter where you live. There are
targets everywhere. Wait....did I say targets? I meant dog owners.

"UglyDan®©T" wrote in message
...
Strange, I thought you said you live in an apartment Doug,
IMO the biggest offenders to gardens are cats, my dog stays in his own
yard, fenced of course, and never goes in the garden, On the other hand
I have a neighbor that thinks its perfectly acceptable to let his cat
stay outside and use my vegtable garden as a litter box, First time I
trapped it I gave it back, 2nd time it went to the pound, This week I'll
be going for a 3rd time since I tilled my garden last week and its full
of cat crap again. Crab season is starting soon so I'll need fresh bait
anyway. Some people don't deserve having cats or dogs. UD



http://community.webtv.net/capuglyda...inUglyDansJack

Sorry to hear your wife left you Doug, Maybe you should get a dog, They
are known to be LOYAL you know.
Besides most women like MEN with dogs, unless of course you've come out
of the closet recently, then it really doesn't matter.
UD

:-) Actually, I left her. And, I have a boat, which is 100% loyal. The
girlfriend, on the other hand, is not 100% loyal to the boat, but I'm
planning on lobotomizing her. She's agreeable to everything else, just not
the boat.

As far as the dog, cleaning up after one is too much like changing diapers.
I had enough of that. :-)


"UglyDan®©T" wrote in message
...
Sorry to hear your wife left you Doug, Maybe you should get a dog, They
are known to be LOYAL you know.
Besides most women like MEN with dogs, unless of course you've come out
of the closet recently, then it really doesn't matter.
UD

Doug Kanter wrote:
Apparently, people can't help being people, either. Even the so-called "good
dog owners" are usually skanks who have no business living within miles of
other people.

Doug, you seem to be having a bad day. I'm sorry to hear it. If you're
going to be a pessimist, at least use it as a reason to be pleasantly
surprised more often.

... Example: I was out working in the garden once when a guy
stopped to let his dog crap on my lawn where it meets the street. He had the
equipment to pick it up afterwards, but as everyone knows, that doesn't
matter. Other dogs find those spots interesting because of the scent. So, I
politely asked him to not stop his dog on my property in the future. He said
he planned to clean it up. I said "Great, but even so, please don't stop
here any more". His next response was something like "That's some attitude
you have toward your neighors", to which I responded "Would it be OK with
you if I haul my trash cans down to your place and dump them on your lawn?"
He said "That's not the same". My final comment was "If you'd like to
continue having a dog, you'll not stop here in the future". He didn't. But,
why should anyone need to go through this hassle? He should've gotten right
to the correct response to my request: "Sure...no problem".

To a large extent I agree, and don't let my dogs crap on other peoples
lawns indescriminately, but OTOH is it that big a deal? Did you get a
written guarantee when you bought your house that NO dog (or any other
living being, for that matter) would ever leave anything on your
property that you didn't want? Would you kill a dog, who was otherwise
better company and has more to contribute than most humans, just for
pooping on your lawn?

If it really is that big a deal, move to an exclusive no dogs allowed
neighborhood. They exist. Several of our neighbors want to outlaw dogs
in our neighborhood... they want to outlaw boats in the driveway, too,
and pass rules about what kind of Christmas decorations you can have.



He's not the exception, either.

"I don't know how he gets out of my yard - really, I don't". (Hole in fence
big enough for a horse to walk through)

"You must be doing something to MAKE him want to visit your garden". (Right.
I grow steak bushes.)

"Oh come on....it's not THAT hard to clean doggy poo off your shoes. I do it
all the time." (A perfect example of coprophilia!)

Like I said, you have a neighbor problem.


We finally got a real dog catcher who behaves like a jack-booted thug. After
the legally required third complaint, he doesn't even knock on the dog
owner's door - he just takes the dog if he sees it, and sends them a letter
in the mail. Spooky. Nasty. Priceless. :-)

Sounds like a good deal, especially if he also rounds up unwanted cats.

Our dog catcher is a young woman who is nice but not really effective at
much except soothing irate elderly women.

Regards
Doug King

"DSK" wrote in message
...
Doug Kanter wrote:
Apparently, people can't help being people, either. Even the so-called
"good
dog owners" are usually skanks who have no business living within miles
of
other people.

Doug, you seem to be having a bad day. I'm sorry to hear it. If you're
going to be a pessimist, at least use it as a reason to be pleasantly
surprised more often.

Actually, I'm having a GREAT day, but mentioning dogs to me is like
mentioning skinheads to a survivor of the holocaust. :-) I'll admit, though,
that I have met ONE good dog in 20 years. Just one.


... Example: I was out working in the garden once when a guy
stopped to let his dog crap on my lawn where it meets the street. He had
the
equipment to pick it up afterwards, but as everyone knows, that doesn't
matter. Other dogs find those spots interesting because of the scent.
So, I
politely asked him to not stop his dog on my property in the future. He
said
he planned to clean it up. I said "Great, but even so, please don't stop
here any more". His next response was something like "That's some
attitude
you have toward your neighors", to which I responded "Would it be OK
with
you if I haul my trash cans down to your place and dump them on your
lawn?"
He said "That's not the same". My final comment was "If you'd like to
continue having a dog, you'll not stop here in the future". He didn't.
But,
why should anyone need to go through this hassle? He should've gotten
right
to the correct response to my request: "Sure...no problem".

To a large extent I agree, and don't let my dogs crap on other peoples
lawns indescriminately, but OTOH is it that big a deal? Did you get a
written guarantee when you bought your house that NO dog (or any other
living being, for that matter) would ever leave anything on your
property that you didn't want? Would you kill a dog, who was otherwise
better company and has more to contribute than most humans, just for
pooping on your lawn?

It's one thing to keep them on a leash. It's another thing entirely to argue
with the property owner over a simple (and totally valid) request. But, what
the hey. The world's full of slobs. Last night, at my son's high school band
concert, there was an entire family talking through the music. Adults.
Unbelievable. The principal finally led them out the door. WTF? Where do
people like this come from? We used to say they were raised in a barn, but
that's an insult to cows and pigs.


If it really is that big a deal, move to an exclusive no dogs allowed
neighborhood. They exist. Several of our neighbors want to outlaw dogs
in our neighborhood... they want to outlaw boats in the driveway, too,
and pass rules about what kind of Christmas decorations you can have.

Actually, I'll be moving outside the city a bit. Legally, you can liquidate
any animal which destroys food crops, as long as your method doesn't
threaten your neighbors, like shooting a .30 caliber rifle toward someone's
home, with no idea that the round's gonna travel for a long way.


We finally got a real dog catcher who behaves like a jack-booted thug.
After
the legally required third complaint, he doesn't even knock on the dog
owner's door - he just takes the dog if he sees it, and sends them a
letter
in the mail. Spooky. Nasty. Priceless. :-)

Sounds like a good deal, especially if he also rounds up unwanted cats.

No self-respecting cat would fall for animal control tricks. :-)

Doug Kanter wrote:
Actually, I'm having a GREAT day, but mentioning dogs to me is like
mentioning skinheads to a survivor of the holocaust. :-) I'll admit, though,
that I have met ONE good dog in 20 years. Just one.

Glad to hear you're having a GREAT day. Mine has only been mediocre. For
one thing, I'm having a hard time rounding up boat parts for a job I'd
like to complete Friday evening.

As for dogs, some people just plain don't like them. And some dogs are a
good reason to not like dogs. But IMHO most of them are better citizens
than most people. Dogs are intrinsically honest & pathologically loyal.
They reduce stress & the crime rate. It's unfortunate for people & dogs
both that our world is changing such that there is less & less of a
place for them, when about 20,000 to 125,000 (depending on how you try
to figure it out) years of evolution have fitted dogs for life within
our civilization.

Personally, I figure a man who cannot train a dog is not fit for the
higher stages of evolution, either, like owning weapons or driving
powered vehicles.



.... Would you kill a dog, who was otherwise
better company and has more to contribute than most humans, just for
pooping on your lawn?


It's one thing to keep them on a leash. It's another thing entirely to argue
with the property owner over a simple (and totally valid) request.

I've had property owners attempt violence just for walking my dog past
their house. In one case, a man and his wife who had newly moved into
our neighborhood both came out and screamed at me because my dog stopped
& sniffed at their mailbox. We have a neighbor who used to tease my dog
through our fence and then complain the dog barked at him.


... The world's full of slobs. Last night, at my son's high school band
concert, there was an entire family talking through the music. Adults.
Unbelievable. The principal finally led them out the door. WTF? Where do
people like this come from? We used to say they were raised in a barn, but
that's an insult to cows and pigs.

Yep. For some people "born in a barn" would be an improvement.


Actually, I'll be moving outside the city a bit. Legally, you can liquidate
any animal which destroys food crops, as long as your method doesn't
threaten your neighbors, like shooting a .30 caliber rifle toward someone's
home, with no idea that the round's gonna travel for a long way.

AFAIK there are similar laws in most states. If you want to get rid of
your neighbor's dog, tell the police and/or animal control that you
think he acts aggressive. Very little tolerance for that anywhere.

One of my friends had a neighbor sic a big Rottweiler on his dog when
they were out for a walk. He was reluctant to report the neighbor, whom
I think sounds like a psychopath.


Sounds like a good deal, especially if he also rounds up unwanted cats.


No self-respecting cat would fall for animal control tricks. :-)

Yes they would. Cats are hard-wired to respond in certain ways to
certain stimuli. All you have to do is know how they're programmed.

Dogs are programmed too, but they have an advantage in that they can be
re-programmed more easily & reliably; and to a wider variety of tasks.
It's no accident that the first behaviorist psychology research was on dogs.

Regards
Doug King