On Feb 4, 4:56*am, Cliff wrote:
[
NEW YORK - Idaho * resident Kathy Evans brought humiliation to her *friends and
family Tuesday when she set a new standard *for stupidity with her appearance on
the popular * TV show, 'Who Wants To Be A Millionaire. ' *

It seems that Evans, a *32-year-old wife *and mother of two, got stuck on the
first question, *and *proceeded to make what fans of the show are *dubbing 'the
absolute worst use of *lifelines *ever.'

After being introduced to the show's host *Meredith Vieira, *Evans assured her
that she was *ready to play, whereupon she was posed with an * extremely easy
$100 question. The question was: *'Which of the following is the largest?'

A) A *Peanut
B) An Elephant
C) The Moon
D) Hey, *who *you calling large?

Immediately Mrs. *Evans was struck with an all consuming panic as she *realized
that this was a question to which she did not * readily know the answer..

'Hmm, oh boy, *that's a toughie,' said Evans, as Vieira did her level *best to
hide her disbelief and disgust. 'I mean, I'm *sure *I've heard of some of these
things before, *but I have no idea how large they would be.'

Evans *made the decision to use the first of her three *lifelines, the 50/50.

Answers A and D were removed, *leaving her to decide which was *bigger, an
elephant or the moon. However, faced with an *incredibly easy question, Evans
still remained unsure. *

'Oh! It removed the two I was leaning towards!' *exclaimed Evans. 'Darn.. I think
I better phone a *friend.'

Using the second of her two lifelines on *the first question, Mrs. *Evans asked
to be *connected with her friend Betsy, who is an office * assistant.

'Hi Betsy! How are you? This is *Kathy! I'm on TV!' said Evans, *wasting the
first *seven seconds of her call. 'Ok, I got an important *question. *Which of
the following is the largest? *B, an elephant, or C, the moon. 15 *seconds hun.'

Betsy quickly replied that the answer was C, the *moon. Evans *proceeded to
argue with her friend *for the remaining ten seconds.

'Come on Betsy, are *you sure?' said Evans. 'How sure are you? Duh, that *can't
be *it.'

To everyone's astonishment, *the moronic Evans declined to take her friend's
advice *and pick 'The Moon.'

'I just don't know if I can *trust Betsy. She's not all that bright. So I think
I'd *like to ask the audience,' *said Evans.

Asked *to vote on the correct answer, the audience returned *98% *in favor of
answer C, 'The Moon.' Having *used up all her lifelines, Evans then *made the
dumbest choice of her life.

'Wow, seems like *everybody is against what I'm thinking,' said the
too-stupid-to- live Evans. 'But you know, sometimes *you just got to go with
your gut. So, let's see. For *which is larger, an elephant or the moon, I'm
going to *have to go with B, an elephant. *Final answer.' *

Evans sat before the dumbfounded audience, the *only one *waiting with bated
breath, and was told *that she was wrong, and that the *answer was in *fact, C,
'The Moon.'

*Caution...they walk among us!

Some guy *bought a new fridge for his house. To get rid of his *old fridge, he
put it in his front yard and hung a *sign on it saying: 'Free to good home. You
want it, *you take it.' For three days the fridge sat there *without even one
person looking twice at it. *He *eventually decided that people were too
un-trusting of *this deal. *It looked too *good to be true, so he changed the
sign to read: *'Fridge for sale $50.' *

The next day *someone stole it! *

***They walk amongst us!***

------------ *--------- --------- --------- --------- *

One *day I was walking down the beach with *some friends when someone
shouted....' Look at *that dead bird!' Someone looked up at the sky and
said...'where? ' *

***They walk among * us!!***

*------------ *--------- --------- --------- --------- *

While *looking at a house, my brother *asked the estate *agent which direction
was north because, he explained, *he didn't want the sun waking him up every
morning. *She asked, 'Does the sun rise in the north?' When my *brother
explained that the sun rises in the east, and *has for sometime, she shook her
head and said, 'Oh, I *don't keep up with that *stuff'

***They *Walk Among *Us!!***

------------ *--------- --------- --------- --------- *

My *colleague and I were eating our lunch in our *cafeteria, when we overheard
one of the administrative *assistants talking about the sunburn she got on her
weekend drive to the beach. She drove down in a *convertible, but 'didn't think
she'd get sunburned *because the car was moving'.

***They Walk Among * Us!!!!***

------------ *--------- --------- --------- --------- *

My sister has a lifesaving tool in her car *it's designed to cut through a seat
belt if she gets *trapped She keeps it in the trunk.

***They Walk Among * Us!!!!!***

--- --------- --------- --------- --------- ---------

I was *hanging out with a friend *when we saw a woman *with a nose ring attached
to an earring by a chain. My * friend said, 'Wouldn't the chain rip out every
time she turned her head?' I *had to explain that *a person's nose and ear
remain the same distance apart *no matter which way the head is turned....

***They Walk Among Us!!!!!!!! ***

------------ *--------- --------- --------- ---------

I *couldn't find my luggage at the airport baggage area. *So I went to the lost
luggage office and told the *woman there that my bags never showed up. She
smiled *and told me not to worry because she was a trained *professional and I
was in good hands. 'Now,' she asked *me, 'Has your plane arrived yet?'....
(I work with *professionals like this.)

***They Walk Among Us!!!!!!!!***

*------------ *--------- --------- --------- ---------

While working at a pizza parlor I observed *a man ordering a small pizza to go.
He appeared to be *alone and the cook asked him if he would like it cut *into 4
pieces or 6. He thought about it for some time *before responding. 'Just cut it
into 4 pieces; I don't * think I'm hungry enough to eat 6 *pieces. *

***Yep, They Walk Among Us, too.!!!!!!!! *

Sadly, not *only do they walk among *us, they also reproduce!
]

Sounds like the same line of genes that Loogy spawned from. BTW...NO
ONE likes a cross-poster.....