Bassetts only want one thing in life. Food. Buddy had one, got hit by a
car as he was returning from sneaking away from the yard to raid garbage
cans. Would not let go of the bagel he had, even after the car broke his
leg.

Max was certainly like that. He would literally Hoover anything within
reach with extreme prejudice and without forethought. As you said, food was
his one true motivator in life. Which presented a real dilemma for the
other one, (Elvis). Elvis, who is filled with contradictions, and is pretty
much a freak of nature on all counts, tends to be quite selective as to what
he goes after, and would otherwise prefer to contemplate the worthiness of
an Epicurean opportunity prior to consumption. With Max anywhere in the
vicinity, the act of contemplation was never a realistic choice, assuming he
wanted any chance of a score. Very much a snooze you lose situation for
him.

On the other hand, don't even think about taking your eye off any piece of
meat, raw or cooked, anywhere near the edge of a counter with Elvis nearby
and on the prowl. Very much a now you see it now you don't situation.
Elvis, although allegedly a purebred Basset with papers, has an
extraordinarily long torso (his nickname is stretch limo), and unusually
long legs for a Basset. I'm convinced he has some Black & Tan Coon Hound or
some such thing somewhere in his ancestry. The evidence of this is that he
stands every bit of four feet tall when standing on his hind legs, which
affords him access to just about anything, anywhere. We bought him from a
private party a the age of 6 months after reading a newspaper want ad which
read "tall for his age". Unfortunately, his unusual dimensions and super
agility are teamed with an unrehabilitable criminal mind. Before you know
it's gone, he's stealthily made off with the booty through the dog door and
made his escape to the back yard, buying just enough time to consume most of
the evidence, before not-quite-instant-enough justice is delivered by yours
truly. It matters not, he's always up for the crime and seems to always
feel it's been worth the time, and would do it again, given the opportunity.

Sadly, we had to let Max slip away from old age late last year, so now Elvis
can take all the time he wants to contemplate the worthiness of legitimate
offerings, while at the same time working both of his brain cells in
planning his next heist.