On Mon, 02 Feb 2004 20:54:04 -0500, Gene Kearns
wrote:

NEW YORK, NY (AP)...
New York, NY. At New York's Kennedy airport today, an individual
later discovered to be a public school teacher was arrested trying to
board a flight while in possession of a ruler, protractor, setsquare,
sliderule, and calculator.

At a morning press conference, Attorney general John Ashcroft said he
believes the man is a member of the notorious al-gebra movement. He is
being charged by the FBI with carrying weapons of math instruction.

"Al-gebra is a fearsome cult," Ashcroft said. "They desire average
solutions by means and extremes, and sometimes go off on tangents in a
search of absolute value. They use secret code names like "x" and "y"
and refer to themselves as "unknowns", but we have determined they
belong to a common denominator of the axis of medieval with
coordinates in every country.

"As the Greek philanderer Isosceles used to say, there are 3 sides to
every triangle," Ashcroft declared. When asked to comment on the
arrest, President Bush said, "If God had wanted us to have better
weapons of math instruction, He would have given us more fingers and
toes."

"I am gratified that our government has given us a sine that it is
intent on protracting us from these math-dogs who are willing to
disintegrate us with calculus disregard. Murky statisticians love to
inflict plane on every sphere of influence," the President said,
adding: "Under the circumferences, we must differentiate their root,
make our point, and draw the line."

President Bush warned, "These weapons of math instruction have the
potential to decimal everything in their math on a scalene never
before seen unless we become exponents of a Higher Power and begin to
factor-in random facts of vertex."

Attorney General Ashcroft said, "As our Great Leader would say, read
my ellipse. Here is one principle he is uncertainty of: though they
continue to multiply, their days are numbered as the hypotenuse
tightens around their necks."

You joke, but the truth shall be worse. Please note:
*********************
The first treatise on algebra was written by Diophantus of Alexandria
in the 3rd century AD. The term derives from the Arabic al-jabr or
literally ``the reunion of broken parts.'' As well as its mathematical
meaning, the word also means the surgical treatment of fractures. It
gained widespread use through the title of a book ilm al-jabr
wa'l-mukabala - the science of restoring what is missing and equating
like with like - written by the mathematician Abu Ja'far Muhammad
(active c.800-847), who subsequently has become know as al-Khwarazmi,
the man of Kwarazm (now Khiva in Uzbekistan).
********************************************
If algebra isn't a terrorist plot, I don't know what is.


John H

On the 'Poco Loco' out of Deale, MD
on the beautiful Chesapeake Bay!

John H wrote:
If algebra isn't a terrorist plot, I don't know what is.

Accounting?

DSK

"John H" wrote in message
...

If algebra isn't a terrorist plot, I don't know what is.


John H

Is that what you teach, John?

On Tue, 03 Feb 2004 10:52:37 -0500, DSK wrote:

John H wrote:
If algebra isn't a terrorist plot, I don't know what is.

Accounting?

DSK

Hee, hee! Yup. I took only one course. That was enough. I could never
figure out how if you owed someone money that was an asset. I thought
the whole course was backwards.

John H

On the 'Poco Loco' out of Deale, MD
on the beautiful Chesapeake Bay!

On Tue, 03 Feb 2004 17:27:28 GMT, "Doug Kanter"
wrote:

"John H" wrote in message
.. .

If algebra isn't a terrorist plot, I don't know what is.


John H

Is that what you teach, John?

One of the subjects, yes!

John H

On the 'Poco Loco' out of Deale, MD
on the beautiful Chesapeake Bay!

John H wrote in message . ..
On Mon, 02 Feb 2004 20:54:04 -0500, Gene Kearns
wrote:

NEW YORK, NY (AP)...
New York, NY. At New York's Kennedy airport today, an individual
later discovered to be a public school teacher was arrested trying to
board a flight while in possession of a ruler, protractor, setsquare,
sliderule, and calculator.

At a morning press conference, Attorney general John Ashcroft said he
believes the man is a member of the notorious al-gebra movement. He is
being charged by the FBI with carrying weapons of math instruction.

"Al-gebra is a fearsome cult," Ashcroft said. "They desire average
solutions by means and extremes, and sometimes go off on tangents in a
search of absolute value. They use secret code names like "x" and "y"
and refer to themselves as "unknowns", but we have determined they
belong to a common denominator of the axis of medieval with
coordinates in every country.

"As the Greek philanderer Isosceles used to say, there are 3 sides to
every triangle," Ashcroft declared. When asked to comment on the
arrest, President Bush said, "If God had wanted us to have better
weapons of math instruction, He would have given us more fingers and
toes."

"I am gratified that our government has given us a sine that it is
intent on protracting us from these math-dogs who are willing to
disintegrate us with calculus disregard. Murky statisticians love to
inflict plane on every sphere of influence," the President said,
adding: "Under the circumferences, we must differentiate their root,
make our point, and draw the line."

President Bush warned, "These weapons of math instruction have the
potential to decimal everything in their math on a scalene never
before seen unless we become exponents of a Higher Power and begin to
factor-in random facts of vertex."

Attorney General Ashcroft said, "As our Great Leader would say, read
my ellipse. Here is one principle he is uncertainty of: though they
continue to multiply, their days are numbered as the hypotenuse
tightens around their necks."

You joke, but the truth shall be worse. Please note:
*********************
The first treatise on algebra was written by Diophantus of Alexandria
in the 3rd century AD. The term derives from the Arabic al-jabr or
literally ``the reunion of broken parts.'' As well as its mathematical
meaning, the word also means the surgical treatment of fractures. It
gained widespread use through the title of a book ilm al-jabr
wa'l-mukabala - the science of restoring what is missing and equating
like with like - written by the mathematician Abu Ja'far Muhammad
(active c.800-847), who subsequently has become know as al-Khwarazmi,
the man of Kwarazm (now Khiva in Uzbekistan).
********************************************
If algebra isn't a terrorist plot, I don't know what is.


Wow, you are REALLY losing it! This spinning to justify BushCo's lies
has really warped your mind.

"John H" wrote in message
...
On Tue, 03 Feb 2004 17:27:28 GMT, "Doug Kanter"
wrote:

"John H" wrote in message
.. .

If algebra isn't a terrorist plot, I don't know what is.


John H

Is that what you teach, John?

One of the subjects, yes!

John H

Well, you'd better keep the quality level high. Kids are getting uppity
these days. Last year (8th grade), my son and some other honor student thugs
began complaining about their algebra teacher. Stuff like: "If we ask too
many questions, he says to go back to the book. And if we ask for 10 minutes
of help after class, he says he doesn't have time." So, I told him to be
sure he was using some sort of metrics to compare the guy with other
teachers. His response was that they knew what a good teacher was, and this
guy wasn't one of the good ones. I thought about two things: First, my
algebra teacher was hideous, and I did lousy. It hobbled me for years
afterward (except for geometry, because the lady teacher had drop-dead
legs). And, I vote YES on all school budget increases. I'm a customer. I
don't pay for tenured loiterers.

Finally, I said "So...write a polite petition and take it to the principal.
Either that, or I'll get involved and you know I'll get it straightened
out". He consulted with his friends. They made a petition. They began
circulating it in the hall between classes. Within 1/2 hour of that, word
got to the principal. There was a handful of suck-ups who probably
functioned as spies. My son and his girlfriend (who is NOT really his
girlfriend, I am warned) were called to the principal's office for a little
talking-to. Afterward, the girlfriend called her grandma, the recently
retired superintendent of our system. Grandma came right over and there was
apparently a "firm conversation" in the principal's office, according to
anonymous sources (probably a Bad Kid waiting his turn with the principal).

Next day, my son came home and said somebody put all new batteries in the
math teacher. He's really being polite, too. :-)

Doug Kanter wrote:

"John H" wrote in message
...
On Tue, 03 Feb 2004 17:27:28 GMT, "Doug Kanter"
wrote:

"John H" wrote in message
.. .

If algebra isn't a terrorist plot, I don't know what is.


John H

Is that what you teach, John?

One of the subjects, yes!

John H

Well, you'd better keep the quality level high.


Does John actually teach? I know he's mentioned he subs in the
Alexandria school system, but my recollection is that he has posted that
he mainly babysits high school kids, and doesn't teach. Or was it that
he tries to teach some math classes if he is assigned one, but doesn't
try to teach if he is assigned to a non-math class.






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Email sent to is never read.

"Harry Krause" wrote in message
...

Does John actually teach? I know he's mentioned he subs in the
Alexandria school system, but my recollection is that he has posted that
he mainly babysits high school kids, and doesn't teach. Or was it that
he tries to teach some math classes if he is assigned one, but doesn't
try to teach if he is assigned to a non-math class.

I have no idea. Is John lying? Do we need an independent inquiry? :-)

Doug Kanter wrote:

"Harry Krause" wrote in message
...

Does John actually teach? I know he's mentioned he subs in the
Alexandria school system, but my recollection is that he has posted that
he mainly babysits high school kids, and doesn't teach. Or was it that
he tries to teach some math classes if he is assigned one, but doesn't
try to teach if he is assigned to a non-math class.

I have no idea. Is John lying? Do we need an independent inquiry? :-)


I'm not sure anything about John passes the WGAS test.



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Email sent to is never read.