You know, asteroids from outer space like to hit boats, this is
because of the secret energy fields under the sea.

So what can I do to prevent asteroid-damage on my boat? Will an
umbrella help?

The only way to be 100% sure you will never be hit is with a device I
invented. It is 1000.00 and has a life time double your money back
guarantee if you get hit. Interested?
JR



Paul Eisner wrote:

You know, asteroids from outer space like to hit boats, this is
because of the secret energy fields under the sea.

So what can I do to prevent asteroid-damage on my boat? Will an
umbrella help?

Only if it's sunbrella, um,or asterella!
G
"Paul Eisner" wrote in message
om...
You know, asteroids from outer space like to hit boats, this is
because of the secret energy fields under the sea.

So what can I do to prevent asteroid-damage on my boat? Will an
umbrella help?

"Paul Eisner" wrote in message
om...
You know, asteroids from outer space like to hit boats, this is
because of the secret energy fields under the sea.

So what can I do to prevent asteroid-damage on my boat? Will an
umbrella help?


If you quit smoking that crap, you'll find that your asteroid impact ratio
decreases dramatically...

On 4 Mar 2005 21:50:08 -0800, (Paul Eisner)
wrote:

You know, asteroids from outer space like to hit boats, this is
because of the secret energy fields under the sea.

So what can I do to prevent asteroid-damage on my boat? Will an
umbrella help?

Aluminum foil - wrap your boat in aluminum foil. Shiny side out. It
reflects and focuses the sun's energy and repells all asteroids
strikes.

Later,

Tom

"Short Wave Sportfishing" wrote in message
...
On 4 Mar 2005 21:50:08 -0800, (Paul Eisner)
wrote:

You know, asteroids from outer space like to hit boats, this is
because of the secret energy fields under the sea.

So what can I do to prevent asteroid-damage on my boat? Will an
umbrella help?

Aluminum foil - wrap your boat in aluminum foil. Shiny side out. It
reflects and focuses the sun's energy and repells all asteroids
strikes.

Later,

Tom

Funny thread. Even more amusing than some of the political ones. ;-)

On Sat, 5 Mar 2005 13:19:44 -0500, "JimH" wrote:


"Short Wave Sportfishing" wrote in message
.. .
On 4 Mar 2005 21:50:08 -0800, (Paul Eisner)
wrote:

You know, asteroids from outer space like to hit boats, this is
because of the secret energy fields under the sea.

So what can I do to prevent asteroid-damage on my boat? Will an
umbrella help?

Aluminum foil - wrap your boat in aluminum foil. Shiny side out. It
reflects and focuses the sun's energy and repells all asteroids
strikes.

Later,

Tom

Funny thread. Even more amusing than some of the political ones. ;-)


I keep my boat in a boatel. Even though many other boats are pelted by
asteroids, mine never gets hit.

Main Entry: 1as·ter·oid
Pronunciation: 'as-t&-"roid
Function: noun
Etymology: Greek asteroeidEs starlike, from aster-, astEr
1 : any of the small black and white, creamy extrusions from the ass of any of
numerous long-winged web-footed aquatic birds (subfamily Larinae of the family
Laridae).


John H

"All decisions are the result of binary thinking."

Most Sailboats are immune to asteroid impact because their mast stays
resemble pyramids. However, unstayed masts have been know to be better
asteroid attractors than even powerboats. If you would like, I can
provide my calculations for the radius of the "Zone of protection"
afforded by a stayed mast.

On 5 Mar 2005 15:55:59 -0800, wrote:

Most Sailboats are immune to asteroid impact because their mast stays
resemble pyramids. However, unstayed masts have been know to be better
asteroid attractors than even powerboats. If you would like, I can
provide my calculations for the radius of the "Zone of protection"
afforded by a stayed mast.

Ah - but you have failed to take into account the random factor of
chaos theory.

Simply, a calculation that I just did demonstrated that the stays
disturb minor wind patterns which in turn affect the flight of sea
gulls creating minor vortex disturbances which eventually make their
way into the upper levels of the atmosphere eventually turning into
storms which move the magnetic and Van Allen belts causing more
meteors to be attracted to other sailboats on the other side of the
world sinking them attracting abnormal amounts of bait fish which
affects tidal structures altering weather patterns in China in which
the rice harvest fails and there is world economic collapse.

And it's all your fault.

On 5 Mar 2005 15:55:59 -0800, wrote:

Most Sailboats are immune to asteroid impact because their mast stays
resemble pyramids. However, unstayed masts have been know to be better
asteroid attractors than even powerboats. If you would like, I can
provide my calculations for the radius of the "Zone of protection"
afforded by a stayed mast.

That would be nice. I am a firm believer that 'pi rules' so I'd be very
interested.


John H

"All decisions are the result of binary thinking."