I love boat ramp stories. Since I live a few hundred yards from the
one I use, I've got plenty of them, not just from using it, but we
often take walks that go past the ramp. In general, I find three
basic types of "boat ramp incidents."

1. The usual fumble-bum boat ramp dingbats. Rolling boats off of
trailers onto the concrete, burning rubber trying to pull out,
forgetting to raise the engine and driving off with the skeg gouging
the pavement, etc.

2. The guy who can't start his engine. This happens a LOT. Joe Schmoe
lets his boat sit in the driveway for 6 months, then decides to "go
boating." So they're all backed down into the water, packed with skis,
vests, ice chests, fishing tackle, and a bunch of excited people
including the wife, kids, dogs, neighbors, and maybe the boss and his
wife. Everybody has a huge smile, ready to go out and have some fun.

He starts the motor: VRMMmmmmmm. Nothing. "Kinda hard to start
sometimes, heh..." VRMMmmmmmm. Nothing. VRMMmmm. vrmm. vrmm.
vrmm... click and the battery's drained. Boy, talk about ugly
facial expressions (especially the wife's). I see this all the time.

3. The idiot who hogs or blocks the ramp. The ones who sit there
backed into the water, for 30 minutes loading stuff onto the boat,
removing the boat cover, etc. while everybody waits in line.

Or the one who pulls his boat JUST off the ramp, then sits there 30
minutes UNLOADING his boat, putting the cover back on, etc. while
everybody waits in line.

Last summer, I saw the Grand Champion of this type. Our boat ramp is
about 2 trailers wide, OK? So this guy pulls up towing a ski boat, and
parks it ACROSS the top of the ramp, completely blocking it. Three
vehicles, trailers in tow (including me) were waiting in line at this
time, and more were approaching.

The guy got out of his car and casually walked down the 200 foot
walkway to the marina to use the bathroom and buy some munchies. 10
minutes later, he's strolling back up the walkway, and he stopped and
just STOOD there, leaning over the rail, looking at the water and
watching the fish! All this time, half a dozen vehicles sitting just
a few feet away, engines running, waiting to launch. Finally, he
slowly, casually strolled back up to his vehicle, got in, fiddled with
something for a minute, started his engine and drove off, as if nobody
else were even there.

Incredible, some people. I can't find the words for it. Just
incredible.

Ron M.