(floating around the 'net...grammar errors included)


I AM AN AMERICAN CONSERVATIVE ****HEEL

This morning I was awoken by my alarm clock powered by electricity
generated by the public power monopoly regulated by the US department of
energy. I then took a shower in the clean water provided by the
municipal water utility. After that, I turned on the TV to one of the
FCC regulated channels to see what the national weather service of the
national oceanographic and atmospheric administration determined the
weather was going to be like using satellites designed, built, and
launched by the national aeronautics and space administration. I watched
this while eating my breakfast of US department of agriculture inspected
food and taking the drugs which have been determined as safe by the food
and drug administration.

At the appropriate time as regulated by the US congress and kept
accurate by the national institute of standards and technology and the
US naval observatory, I get into my national highway traffic safety
administration approved automobile and set out to work on the roads
build by the local, state, and federal departments of transportation,
possibly stopping to purchase additional fuel of a quality level
determined by the environmental protection agency, using legal tender
issed by the federal reserve bank. On the way out the door I deposit any
mail I have to be sent out via the US postal service and drop the kids
off at the public school.

After spending another day not being maimed or killed at work
thanks to the workplace regulations imposed by the department of labor
and the occupational safety and health administration, enjoying another
two meals which again do not kill me because of the USDA, I drive my
NHTSA car back home on the DOT roads, to ny house which has not burned
down in my absence because of the state and local building codes and
fire marshal’s inspection, and which has not been plundered of all it’s
valuables thanks to the local police department.

I then log on to the internet which was developed by the defense
advanced research projects administration and post on freerepublic.com
and fox news forums about how SOCIALISM in medicine is BAD because the
government can’t do anything right.