I just pass them along....

Jeff Gordon fires entire pit crew. (NASCAR)

This announcement followed Gordon's decision to take advantage of President
Obama's scheme to employ Aryan youngsters.

The decision to hire them was brought about by a recent documentary on how
unemployed Aryan youths were able to remove a set of wheels in less than 6
seconds without proper equipment, whereas Gordon's existing crew could only
do it in 8 seconds with millions of dollars worth of high tech equipment.
It was thought to be an excellent and bold move by Gordon's management team
as most races are won or lost in the pits. However, Gordon got more than he
bargained for!

At the crew's first practice session, not only was the inexperienced crew
able to change all 4 wheels in under 6 seconds, but within 12 seconds they
had changed the paint scheme, altered the Vin number, and sold the car to
Dale Earnhart Jr. for 10 cases of Bud, a bag of weed, and some photos of
Harry's wife in the shower.

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Tyrants and liberals have a lot in common
- they want to control every aspect of our lives.