Cleverly hidden within this post, for added incentive to read onward, is one
lie. Not a lie of statistical or grammatical error but a ludicrous falsehood
at once so absurd as to strike the reader as an insult to human intelligence
and yet so insane as to convince the reader that I could hazard a guess and
say that Mr. Joe Sevenseassinbad's favorite prissy, antihumanist screeds
will talk about you and me in terms that are not fit to be repeated. Without
going into all the gory details, let's just say that Sevenseassinbad doesn't
use words for communication or for exchanging information. He uses them to
rabble rouse, to incite, to mislead, and to deceive. There's something I've
observed about him. Namely, he may not know how to encourage dissent. He
obviously knows how to alter, amend, abridge, and censor the record to point
the finger of responsibility at others.

He still believes his absurd rescue was necessary and prudent when nothing
could be further from the truth. I've further observed that Sevenseassinbad
believes that responsibility and chickening out are identical concepts.
Although it is perhaps impossible to change the perspective of those who
have such beliefs, I wish nevertheless to build a coalition of stouthearted
people devoted to stopping Sevenseassinbad's unjustified rationalization of
failure as success.

Yes, the extent of collaboration between Sevenseassinbad and obsessive
liberal thinkers is currently unknown but presumably significant, but here
is the point that is worth considering: It's debatable whether he can see
the forest for the trees. However, no one can disagree that we have a
choice. Either we let ourselves be led like lambs to the slaughter by
Sevenseassinbad and his subalterns or we make Sevenseassinbad's ludicrous
seamanship understood, resisted, and made the object of deserved contempt by
young and old alike. While I don't expect you to have much trouble making up
your mind you should nevertheless consider that Sevenseassinbad takes things
out of context, twists them around, and then neglects to provide decent
referencing so the reader can check up on him. He also ignores all of the
evidence that doesn't support (or in many cases directly contradicts) his
position that trying is such a great accomplishment.

Sevenseassinbad knows that performing an occasional act of charity (school
supplies to Belizeans) will make some people forgive -- or at least
overlook -- all of his flagitious shortcomings. My take on the matter is
that it will not be easy to make him admit to his blatant screw-ups.
Nevertheless, we must attempt to do exactly that for the overriding reason
that Sevenseassinbad plans to discredit legitimate voices who speak of safe
and sane seamanship. Giving him rein will result in an amalgam of nasty
charlatanism and subversive liberalism if such a monster can be imagined.

Let me give you an important hint: When trying to understand what
Sevenseassinbad is up to, look at what he is doing and what he has done.
Don't let yourself be distracted by the patter and the hand-waving; keep
your eye on the shell that has the pea under it. And focus your mind on the
fact that I must part company with many of my peers when it comes to
understanding why Sevenseassinbad lives in a world of privileged,
self-inflated emotion devoid of any connectable empirical dots. My
professional seaman peers warrant that it would be a strategic blunder of
epic proportions for Sevenseassinbad to get away, Scott free with his
pitiful excuses for the inexcusable. While this is doubtlessly true, I
maintain we must add that most people react to his insolent and arrogant,
empty-headed ipse dixits as they would to having a pile of steaming pig
manure dumped in their companionway. Even when they can cope, they resent
having to do so. Speaking of resentment, Sevenseassinbad is the picture of
the insane person on the dock, babbling to a seagull, a piling, or a dock
box which cannot and does not respond to his rantings and ravings.

Sevenseassinbad claims that prudent seamanship interests can and should be
sidestepped whenever his unprofessional personal interests are at stake. I
respond that I, speaking as someone who is a consummate, licensed
professional with an unblemished record and thousands of sea miles under my
keel, am ashamed to admit that I live on the same planet and sail the same
seas as he. Unfortunately, there is no shortage of individuals and
organizations, many of whom may seem innocent at first glance, who secretly
want to inexperience and ineptitude for bona fide voyaging expertise. It's
possible that Joe is morally debased and has no convictions of right or
wrong. However, I cannot speculate about that possibility here because I
need to devote more space to a description of how my professional stance is
more than just a moral stance. It is the consensus of society on our minimum
standards of behavior, not to be confused with imagined norms based on total
lack of self-esteem.

Once we have absorbed and understood Sevenseassinbad's mindless wisecracks,
it is our inescapable responsibility to do whatever is necessary to begin a
course of careful, planned, and coordinated action. Sevenseassinbad's tricks
are dodgy. They're unnecessary. They're counterproductive. Whenever I
encounter them I think that ignorance is bliss. This may be why
Sevenseassinbad's legates are generally all smiles.

While Sevenseassinbad and other sanctimonious twerps sometimes differ on the
details and scale of their imaginary voyages they never fail to agree on
the basic principle and substance that someone or something outside their
control is always to blame for their failings. Hence, it is imperative that
you understand that even when he isn't lying, Sevenseassinbad's using facts,
emphasizing facts, bearing down on facts, sliding off facts, quietly
ignoring facts, and, above all, interpreting facts in a way that will enable
him to substitute speculation for facts does us all a grave disservice.
Still, we shouldn't jump to conclusions, even though it is a known fact that
his shenanigans are an icon for the deterioration of the professional
seamanship, for its slow slide into a rescue me when I get frightened
mentality.

Sevenseassinbad has only one goal: to turn responsible sailing upside-down
so that the dregs and wannabes on the bottom rung become the step on the
top. It is quite true, of course, that the communicative efficacy of his
connection with obtuse storytellers will cause reprehensible, uncompromising
analphabetics to generate an epidemic of abandonments and founderings
before the year is over.

It is therefore clear that Sevenseassinbad seizes every opportunity to shift
blame from his own shortcomings to those who suffer from them. I cannot
believe his colossal clownishness. Any sane person knows that I'm sticking
out my neck a bit in talking about Sevenseassinbad's snow jobs. It's quite
likely he will try to retaliate against me for my telling you that every so
often you'll see me lament, flog myself, cry mea culpa for increasing
society's cycle of non-PC and lack of brotherhood.

Sevenseassinbad presents himself as a professional captain with years of
experience. He is eloquent in his denunciation of classic seamanship,
claiming it outdated in this day and age of the village rescuing the lost
wanderer. And here we have the ultimate irony because he makes it sound like
he knows 100% of everything 100% of the time. That's the rankest sort of
pretense I've ever heard. The reality is that Sevenseassinbad is still going
around insisting that it's okay for him to indulge his every whim and
laughable failed business venture without regard for anyone else's safety or
for society as a whole.

Jeez, I thought I had made it perfectly clear to him that whenever there's
good advice offered by his betters that he should heed that advice, not go
off half-cocked to his near destruction. I remain confident that he will
keep ignoring those who seek to keep him safe. This should settle the
argument that he is deserving of such concern pretty quickly. I believe that
Sevenseassinbad will indeed impose a particular, imaginary, continuously
re-embellished version of history to rationalize his humiliation and failure
at a simple commercial venture. I base this confident prediction on, among
other things, the fact that he ought to realize that the most valuable of
all sailing tenets is that a captain of the ship's word is law but the word
needs to be based upon more than some weenie, imagined competence.
Unfortunately, Sevenseassinbad tends to utter so much verbiage about "it was
outta my control" that I can conclude only that some people have said that
his attitudes, opinions, and aspirations are forged by a desire to
introduce, cultivate, and encourage moral rot. Maybe. But I'm more inclined
to believe that only the impartial and unimpassioned mind will even consider
that Sevenseassinbad avoids, because he is soft, choices that lead him down
a path of pain and suffering. Imagine that! What real seaman never suffered
pain and suffering. Why, we take it all in stride. We don't yell, "UNCLE"
and broadcast a Mayday!

In closing let me be brief. Examine with care what Joe has wrought. Do the
opposite. You will then be guaranteed a successful voyage.

Yours in abiding concern,
Wilbur Hubbard