Went out with my wife and 9 yr old daughter today, left my 15 yr old
son at home and 19 yr old daughter is off at college. Even with this
few people on my 28' S2, I felt crowded and wished nobody was in my
way. It didnt help when a gust caught us unexpectedly and threw us
waaaaaay over and my wife gasped and got a death grip on the
companionway. I am not so confident myself that someone elses fear
does not rattle me and I had to tell myself "Be calm and slow".
By myself, I can concentrate and work things out without worrying about
stepping on someones hands or whether or not they are tied in. Maybe
being concerned about my family makes me nervous but alone I am a far
better sailor. Unfortunately, my wife does not like me to sail alone
and openly worries about what could happen to me in such windy
conditions. My assertion that due to my personality quirks that I am
actually safer alone do not make her feel better. The past year and a
half in which I have done a considerable amount of single handing has
convinced me that I am far better alone sailing and I have more fun. I
dunno what to do but family sailing doesnt work for me.

I guess it cuts both ways.. I do like sailing by myself, but there are times
when I like sailing with others more. It doesn't seem to be dependent upon
the kind of weather. I've come back through the slot with others and had a
great time, other times wished I was alone, other times wished there were
others with me. Perhaps if the weather isn't great then I slightly favor
having company.

--
"j" ganz @@
www.sailnow.com

wrote in message
oups.com...
Went out with my wife and 9 yr old daughter today, left my 15 yr old
son at home and 19 yr old daughter is off at college. Even with this
few people on my 28' S2, I felt crowded and wished nobody was in my
way. It didnt help when a gust caught us unexpectedly and threw us
waaaaaay over and my wife gasped and got a death grip on the
companionway. I am not so confident myself that someone elses fear
does not rattle me and I had to tell myself "Be calm and slow".
By myself, I can concentrate and work things out without worrying about
stepping on someones hands or whether or not they are tied in. Maybe
being concerned about my family makes me nervous but alone I am a far
better sailor. Unfortunately, my wife does not like me to sail alone
and openly worries about what could happen to me in such windy
conditions. My assertion that due to my personality quirks that I am
actually safer alone do not make her feel better. The past year and a
half in which I have done a considerable amount of single handing has
convinced me that I am far better alone sailing and I have more fun. I
dunno what to do but family sailing doesnt work for me.

wrote in message
oups.com...
Went out with my wife and 9 yr old daughter today, left my 15 yr old
son at home and 19 yr old daughter is off at college. Even with this
few people on my 28' S2, I felt crowded and wished nobody was in my
way. It didnt help when a gust caught us unexpectedly and threw us
waaaaaay over and my wife gasped and got a death grip on the
companionway. I am not so confident myself that someone elses fear
does not rattle me and I had to tell myself "Be calm and slow".
By myself, I can concentrate and work things out without worrying about
stepping on someones hands or whether or not they are tied in. Maybe
being concerned about my family makes me nervous but alone I am a far
better sailor. Unfortunately, my wife does not like me to sail alone
and openly worries about what could happen to me in such windy
conditions. My assertion that due to my personality quirks that I am
actually safer alone do not make her feel better. The past year and a
half in which I have done a considerable amount of single handing has
convinced me that I am far better alone sailing and I have more fun. I
dunno what to do but family sailing doesnt work for me.

Sort of how I feel about riding my motorcycle with my wife on her's. I worry
too much about her and then I am a less safe rider myself. I'm much better
rider when either alone or riding with non-family riders.
Scout

wrote:
Went out with my wife and 9 yr old daughter today, left my 15 yr old
son at home and 19 yr old daughter is off at college. Even with this
few people on my 28' S2, I felt crowded and wished nobody was in my
way. It didnt help when a gust caught us unexpectedly and threw us
waaaaaay over and my wife gasped and got a death grip on the
companionway. I am not so confident myself that someone elses fear
does not rattle me and I had to tell myself "Be calm and slow".
By myself, I can concentrate and work things out without worrying about
stepping on someones hands or whether or not they are tied in. Maybe
being concerned about my family makes me nervous but alone I am a far
better sailor. Unfortunately, my wife does not like me to sail alone
and openly worries about what could happen to me in such windy
conditions. My assertion that due to my personality quirks that I am
actually safer alone do not make her feel better. The past year and a
half in which I have done a considerable amount of single handing has
convinced me that I am far better alone sailing and I have more fun. I
dunno what to do but family sailing doesnt work for me.


Your wife and kids need to go somewhere and either sail with OPB's
to get used to sailing or they need to enroll in classes...and you
need to start sailing with teamwork....unless you really do want to
be divorced and really alone...

Maybe you need a bigger boat?

SV

wrote in message
oups.com..
..
Went out with my wife and 9 yr old daughter today, left
my 15 yr old
son at home and 19 yr old daughter is off at college.
Even with this
few people on my 28' S2, I felt crowded and wished nobody
was in my
way. It didnt help when a gust caught us unexpectedly and
threw us
waaaaaay over and my wife gasped and got a death grip on
the
companionway. I am not so confident myself that someone
elses fear
does not rattle me and I had to tell myself "Be calm and
slow".
By myself, I can concentrate and work things out without
worrying about
stepping on someones hands or whether or not they are tied
in. Maybe
being concerned about my family makes me nervous but alone
I am a far
better sailor. Unfortunately, my wife does not like me to
sail alone
and openly worries about what could happen to me in such
windy
conditions. My assertion that due to my personality
quirks that I am
actually safer alone do not make her feel better. The
past year and a
half in which I have done a considerable amount of single
handing has
convinced me that I am far better alone sailing and I have
more fun. I
dunno what to do but family sailing doesnt work for me.

"Scout" wrote in message
...

Sort of how I feel about riding my motorcycle with my wife
on her's. I worry
too much about her and then I am a less safe rider myself.
I'm much better
rider when either alone or riding with non-family riders.
Scout


I used to cringe whan my wife asked to ride along ( on the
back). I'd have to cut my speeds in half.
Now, as an old fart, I enjoy taking her at slower speeds.

Scotty

Sounds like yall just need a bit more time sailing together in various
conditions. Like Katy said they need to get into sail trimming or
something else, that keeps them out of the companion way and out on
deck. had they been assigned to a sil the perhpas you would not have
been blown over so much.

We had a great weekend sailing. Had rain or a drizzle and sailed to
the Trinity river on the other side of the bay Saturday. The rain
stopped around 1500 and it warmed up just in time to come into the
Kemah cut and toss beads in our Yachtygra parade. Then back out to
Redfish island in the bay for a night on the hook. We spent yeaterday
sailing down to Galveston and back in perfect weather. My wife loves
taking the wheel and can hold her at any point I request. I like to
singlehand myself , and do often with the help of the CPT auto pilot.
Anytime we are underway over 16 hours it's almost the same for me as
single handling, as my wife just does not have the strength needed to
trim and douse some sails, but I can sleep sound with her on the wheel.
When its just us I always reef, at night or just go to Jig & Jigger
before I hit the bunk.

But the 13ft La Brisa is mine anytime i have the need to getaway, but
then Skipper (our dog) has to go or gets really ****ed off.

Joe

Maybe you should try to get your family involved in the sailing.
Let the 9 yr old take the wheel when you have the room, etc
everyone will enjoy it more...

Db,

My solution; Teach all your family to sail the boat. You go along for
the ride. You offer your advice; GENTLY! Teach all and every crew to
sail the boat and if you make them happy learning, with your advice,
they will soon be looking to try a get to the situations that use to
frighten them.




http://community.webtv.net/tassail/ThomPage

http://community.webtv.net/tassail/Pneuma

Dave wrote:
On 27 Feb 2006 07:44:38 -0800, "tom" said:

Maybe you should try to get your family involved in the sailing.
Let the 9 yr old take the wheel when you have the room, etc
everyone will enjoy it more...

It take it that's what he was doing. What he's saying is that it didn't work
for anyone. I congratulate David on being realistic enough to recognize
reality and enjoy it.

We have done family sailing for many years and I have lost count of the
number of times I have taught my wife how to tie a bowline or even to
put a line on a cleat. It isnt important to her so she forgets
quickly. She did take sailing lessons many years ago. My 9 year old
may "connect" with sailing but my older kids did not. However, my wife
objects to me taking the 9 year old sailing without her. In spite of
what Katy says, divorce isnt likely after being married over 25 yrs.
The realization that I am a safer and better sailor when I am alone
really surprised me but it fits in with how I operate at work. I have
never been a team player (yes, its a personality flaw but it works for
me) and do my best work alone. In fact, I find my brain nearly shuts
down around co-workers so I must be alone to do real work. My wife is
very sociable and is easily distracted by people and ignores the boat.
I admit, I fiind guests aboard to be a distraction I dislike. Being
the ultimate geek physics/engineer, my love for sailing is with problem
solving and this is hard to do with distractions.
A larger boat is a poor solution because I think my 28' is the ideal
size for single handing.
We will continue to do family sailing, but I really want to do single
handing too. I've tried various strategies like always wearing my
auto-inflate harness/lifejacket, wearing a personal EPIRB and strobe,
having the cell phone with me, etc. to alleviate her fears for me. Any
suggestions?