On Feb 10, 10:46 pm, "Bill Kearney" wrote:
Try paying for some lessons for her. It'll make a world of difference.

Without you being present. Get her to bring another girlfriend along. Let
them learn at their own pace from someone that's being paid to do it.

Don't try and teach her yourself. You're too involved emotionally.

Words like "control freak" and "divorce" seem applicable here.

Just how much good is it going to do for your relationship with your wife to
get so utterly freaked out about it? If she's not grasping it, well, what's
that saying? Is it saying she's dumb as a stone? I'm not guessing
discussing it that way is going to lead in productive directions. Or is it
that she just hates your attitude and is deliberately doing a bad job of it?
My guess is somewhere in between the two.

But hey, you picked her, so you're going to have to take a new tack at
dealing with her sailing skills... or suffer the consequences.

She has numerous good qualities but unfortunately sailing ability isnt
one of em. I strongly suspect she just does not "connect" to it right
because she wants to use the time to socialize and talk to the kids
and do all the stuff she would be doing if she wasnt steering. I also
think that learning the numerous other things like knots simply is not
important to her although she says it is. I believe it would be best
if she simply came along for the ride and did not try to do anything
at all.
Oddly, she isnt a bad driver in a car but the two do not seem to cross
over for her. She has had sailing lessons from someone else but it
just didnt "take". She is the control freak in our relationship so
she insists on being able to steer in spite of not being able to do it
at all.
Later, after the jibe, she insisted on staying at the helm and she
wanted to get back before dark and wanted me to start the engine
because we were doing only 3.5 kts by the GPS. I replied that I had
been doing 5.5 a few minutes before and the problem would be apparent
if she looked at our wake. The wake was an incredible zigzag so the
boat could build no momentum and even the engine wouldnt help if she
was steered so erratically. A few minutes later she went below
because it got cold leaving me to steer. Soon, we were back up to
nearly 6 kts. Of course, it was pretty cold at home last night
too.........