Mount Rushmore

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Oh dear. You must not have heard.......

There's been oil discovered under Mt. Rushmore. Sources say it's enough
to supply the
domestic needs of the entire United States for 4-6 months.

It's coming down, of course. Some company that Dick Cheney used to to
head has been awarded a non-bid, no-limit, off-budget contract to
demolish Rushmore. Rumor has it that they will employ a couple of
thousand non-union "guest workers" with hispanic surnames to do the job
with picks and shovel, and bill out the time at $250.00 an hour.
Additional rumors that the
INS will haul away the entire workforce each week, exactly half an hour
before payday, are probably unfounded.

Next on the agenda will be Yellowstone Park. Some good ol' Texas oil
boys have an exclusive contract to tap all that geothermal energy
currently "going to waste". They will be given access the the
taxpayer's park free of charge, of course, and then allowed to charge
us all through the nostrils for the energy they "recover" from our
publicly owned natural resources.

Maybe then we can rename Old Faithful the George W. Bush Fountain of
Truth. It would seem appropriate: blows a lot of hot air on a regular
basis, but once the sound and fury has subsided very little else in the
immediate vicinity has actually changed.

And even if the reports of oil under Mt Rushmore should prove to be
false, there's one more reason that GWB could never join the other
presidents depicted there.......there isn't enough room remaining on
the mountain for the sculptor to put GWB's image an appropriate
distance (half a mile?) to the right.