Shame and debasement
 

katy wrote:
katy wrote:
Chi Chi wrote:

The wife should buy hubby an auto pilot for christmas so she can stay
home and face all those challenges of raising children that You speak
so highly of. I noticed dear kate You ignored the part where the hubby
stated he has told her and shown her time and time again how to do
things and she can't seem to get it.


He obviously has no teaching skills, Neal.

Of course you blame the man for not having patience with the

female but did You ever stop to think maybe she's just not smart
enough to get it.


Or he's not communicative enough to express the correct thing to do?


Oh wait that takes thinking. sorry

Something he obviously didn't do.

"katy" wrote in message
...

Gilligan wrote:

Leave the wife home.


She wants to sail.

Obviously she can not contribute to the solution of the

problem, she can only make matters worse.


Because he doesn't have the patience or whatever to communicate the
workings properly.
Just think of what might have

happened if someone was injured or quick action was needed to
prevent catastrophe.


He would have fallen apart.

The icing on the cake is to mention to her how lonely her retirement
will be when you are out sailing the world - without her.


No...for Christmas he should buy her sailing lessons with a female
instrictor or a male instructor with a ;ot of experience teaching
women and children..and the daughter should go, too/ I did not learn
to sail by being taught by my husband. He assumed too much. And when
I got it wrong he ye;;ed. So I sought out others with a lot of
sailing experience and began sailing on their boats. Funny how other
people are loathe to yell at you on their boats. The constraints of
pioliteness with someone elses wife helps a lot. (And their wife will
crawl all over them if they yell at you.)

I do not understand why men are expected to cater to women's
emotionally driven whims and are expected to "apologize" for not
understanding.


He acted like an asshole. If he doesn't apologize just what do you
think the consequences at home will be? I suppose there are some men
who prefer the vouch for life.
Why

aren't women expected to understand men?


They do. That's the problem.

Why is it assumed that women are so

handicapped?


Men make this assumption. It makes them feel manly and strong. Goes
back to the cave days. The genetics haven't been wiped out yet.

Why must men yield to this emotional terrorism?

Because they like warm bodies...

Women are wired for dealing with children, other women and some
family matters.


Dealing with children means a woman deals with every aspect of life:
danger, illness, transportation, education, feeding, clothing,
caring, emergencies, disasters, household management. ALl the things
you need to deal with when sailing.

Men are wired for dealing with the external world - things such as

attacking beasts, danger, dinosaurs, thugs, science, sailing and the
like.


You've never seen my mother go after a snake with a hoe. Or my
grandmother after a fox that got into her chickens. You are making
incorrect suppositions here. Women face beasts all day. They face
the external world everyday when they have to deal with teachers, the
pharmacist, the doctor, and the repairmen who come to the hoise to
fix ehatever her husband can't.


In your situation there was a conflict between the manly world and
the woman's world. It looks like the costliest solution won.


Bunk.....

It is unfortunate that the great and powerful mind of that Master
Mariner Capt Neal is not here to contribute further on this subject.
I am certain that he would add brilliant insight.


And thank God for that...



OK...after reading his explanation of the history of sailing in his
family, I addend this. WHen you take her sailing, don't ask her to do
anything. Make her as comfortable as possible. Have a bottle of wine
on board. A boc of chocolates, a good book. Ig things get dicey, don't
get mad. Just clear the decks and do what has to be done. And get your
engine fixed so it never happens again. DON'T not take her sailing when
she asks. Take fer, grit your teeth, and think of the benefits that
might come from being pleasant for the day.

katy:

In a long term relationship, you never stop hoping the other partner
will someday get interested in what interests you. She seems to think
that someday i will miraculously be interested in going to plays. I
foolishly think that maybe she will somehow get interested in sailing..
There is also the teaching aspect. SHE IS a teacher by profession and
I am not. I just expect copmpetence from people and I admit to having
little patience.
Generally, you cannot choose the conditions when you go sailing, you
look out to sea and either go or not. I've backed down from family
sailing trips due to weather but this time it looked OK in spite of no
other boats being out and generally I think I can fix anything on my
boat. Given time, I could have fixed the engine and had a great story
to tell. OK, I still have a story but I just dont look good in it.

Shame and debasement
 

OK...after reading his explanation of the history of sailing in his
family, I addend this. WHen you take her sailing, don't ask her to do
anything. Make her as comfortable as possible. Have a bottle of wine
on board. A boc of chocolates, a good book. Ig things get dicey, don't
get mad. Just clear the decks and do what has to be done. And get your
engine fixed so it never happens again. DON'T not take her sailing when
she asks. Take fer, grit your teeth, and think of the benefits that
might come from being pleasant for the day.

Oh sure I'd bet You'd like that, being treated like royalty I suppose is
what You expect from men just because You're a female. With that type of
attitude the captain ought to throw your ass overboard. You ever hear the
word teamwork? Just like a marriage sailing is a team thing but I doubt You
comprehend that.

Shame and debasement
 

Though you are beautiful and talented, I beg to differ as history and
traditios supports my stance.

Whenever a sea disaster strikes the first call is "women and children to the
lifeboats!". Is that to put them in safety? No, because bobbing about the
sea in small boats is not safe. The reason it is done is to get them out of
the way of those doing a more important manly job - namely that of saving
the ship. Whether it is hacking the limbs off of a giant octopus trying to
drag the ship under, reinforcing the shattered hull of an ocean liner or
firing cannons at British imperialists it is a manly man's job. Women and
children will just simply get in the way and impede the greater good.

David is at fault for not having a lifeboat in which to put the women and
children. God forbid that he wasn't attacked by a giant octopus!





"katy" wrote in message
...
Gilligan wrote:
Leave the wife home.

She wants to sail.

Obviously she can not contribute to the solution of the
problem, she can only make matters worse.

Because he doesn't have the patience or whatever to communicate the
workings properly.
Just think of what might have
happened if someone was injured or quick action was needed to prevent
catastrophe.

He would have fallen apart.

The icing on the cake is to mention to her how lonely her retirement will
be when you are out sailing the world - without her.

No...for Christmas he should buy her sailing lessons with a female
instrictor or a male instructor with a ;ot of experience teaching women
and children..and the daughter should go, too/ I did not learn to sail by
being taught by my husband. He assumed too much. And when I got it wrong
he ye;;ed. So I sought out others with a lot of sailing experience and
began sailing on their boats. Funny how other people are loathe to yell
at you on their boats. The constraints of pioliteness with someone elses
wife helps a lot. (And their wife will crawl all over them if they yell at
you.)

I do not understand why men are expected to cater to women's emotionally
driven whims and are expected to "apologize" for not understanding.

He acted like an asshole. If he doesn't apologize just what do you think
the consequences at home will be? I suppose there are some men who prefer
the vouch for life.
Why
aren't women expected to understand men?

They do. That's the problem.

Why is it assumed that women are so
handicapped?

Men make this assumption. It makes them feel manly and strong. Goes back
to the cave days. The genetics haven't been wiped out yet.

Why must men yield to this emotional terrorism?

Because they like warm bodies...

Women are wired for dealing with children, other women and some family
matters.

Dealing with children means a woman deals with every aspect of life:
danger, illness, transportation, education, feeding, clothing, caring,
emergencies, disasters, household management. ALl the things you need to
deal with when sailing.

Men are wired for dealing with the external world - things such as
attacking beasts, danger, dinosaurs, thugs, science, sailing and the
like.

You've never seen my mother go after a snake with a hoe. Or my
grandmother after a fox that got into her chickens. You are making
incorrect suppositions here. Women face beasts all day. They face the
external world everyday when they have to deal with teachers, the
pharmacist, the doctor, and the repairmen who come to the hoise to fix
ehatever her husband can't.

In your situation there was a conflict between the manly world and the
woman's world. It looks like the costliest solution won.

Bunk.....

It is unfortunate that the great and powerful mind of that Master Mariner
Capt Neal is not here to contribute further on this subject. I am certain
that he would add brilliant insight.

And thank God for that...

Shame and debasement
 

"Chi Chi" wrote in message
m...
OK...after reading his explanation of the history of sailing in his
family, I addend this. WHen you take her sailing, don't ask her to do
anything. Make her as comfortable as possible. Have a bottle of wine
on board. A boc of chocolates, a good book. Ig things get dicey, don't
get mad. Just clear the decks and do what has to be done. And get your
engine fixed so it never happens again. DON'T not take her sailing when
she asks. Take fer, grit your teeth, and think of the benefits that
might come from being pleasant for the day.

Oh sure I'd bet You'd like that, being treated like royalty I suppose is
what You expect from men just because You're a female. With that type of
attitude the captain ought to throw your ass overboard. You ever hear the
word teamwork? Just like a marriage sailing is a team thing but I doubt
You comprehend that.


For what it's worth, I have this exact relationship with my husband -- he
doesn't care to learn a thing about sailing, doesn't particularly like it,
and wouldn't mind at all if I sold Escapade. Then again, he does, from time
to time, enjoy a day out on the water. So when we go sailing I treat it as
if I'm single-handing. I try to lure him into the cockpit if it's nice out
and there's something "interesting to see" (what -- just the water isn't
enough!?) but otherwise leave him to nap below or whatever he wants to do.

Granted, it's more fun when I have my sister and family aboard, because they
absolutely LOVE sailing, and want to learn about it. But you know what they
say: "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't teach him to gybe."

Shame and debasement
 

"Gilligan" wrote in message
. ..
Though you are beautiful and talented, I beg to differ as history and
traditios supports my stance.

Whenever a sea disaster strikes the first call is "women and children to
the lifeboats!". Is that to put them in safety? No, because bobbing about
the sea in small boats is not safe. The reason it is done is to get them
out of the way of those doing a more important manly job - namely that of
saving the ship. Whether it is hacking the limbs off of a giant octopus
trying to drag the ship under, reinforcing the shattered hull of an ocean
liner or firing cannons at British imperialists it is a manly man's job.
Women and children will just simply get in the way and impede the greater
good.

David is at fault for not having a lifeboat in which to put the women and
children. God forbid that he wasn't attacked by a giant octopus!


Gilligan, I hate to have to say this, but you are lying.

The women and children were meant to be bait.

Shame and debasement
 

"KLC Lewis" wrote in message
...

"Gilligan" wrote in message
. ..
Though you are beautiful and talented, I beg to differ as history and
traditios supports my stance.

Whenever a sea disaster strikes the first call is "women and children to
the lifeboats!". Is that to put them in safety? No, because bobbing about
the sea in small boats is not safe. The reason it is done is to get them
out of the way of those doing a more important manly job - namely that of
saving the ship. Whether it is hacking the limbs off of a giant octopus
trying to drag the ship under, reinforcing the shattered hull of an ocean
liner or firing cannons at British imperialists it is a manly man's job.
Women and children will just simply get in the way and impede the greater
good.

David is at fault for not having a lifeboat in which to put the women and
children. God forbid that he wasn't attacked by a giant octopus!


Gilligan, I hate to have to say this, but you are lying.

The women and children were meant to be bait.


LOL!!!!!

Shame and debasement
 

"Ryk" wrote in message
...
On Mon, 20 Nov 2006 11:19:14 GMT, in message

Short Wave Sportfishing wrote:

I apologize in advance if this sounds offensive, but with that size
boat and the potential for incidents like this to happen, laying out a
few bucks a year for towing and ungrounding assistance is essential.

That probably depends on where and how one sails. I'm not shy about
touching bottom gently, but so far have always managed to get out of
things without help. (Knocks on wood...) Eventually I will probably
have a grounding that requires outside assistance that I have to pay
for, but paying out yearly for towing assistance just goes against the
grain of self sufficiency.

Of course, I have the advantage of sailing mostly in deep water...

Ryk


And you break or tangle a rudder. Aquaintance wrapped a large truck tire
around one of his props 300 miles off shore of Caba San Lucas. For about
$100 a year, you get road service on the water.

Shame and debasement
 

In a long term relationship, you never stop hoping the other partner
will someday get interested in what interests you. She seems to think
that someday i will miraculously be interested in going to plays. I
foolishly think that maybe she will somehow get interested in sailing..
There is also the teaching aspect. SHE IS a teacher by profession and
I am not. I just expect copmpetence from people and I admit to having
little patience.
Generally, you cannot choose the conditions when you go sailing, you
look out to sea and either go or not. I've backed down from family
sailing trips due to weather but this time it looked OK in spite of no
other boats being out and generally I think I can fix anything on my
boat. Given time, I could have fixed the engine and had a great story
to tell. OK, I still have a story but I just dont look good in it.


At least you're a big enough person to admit it and go on....

Shame and debasement
 

Chi Chi wrote:
OK...after reading his explanation of the history of sailing in his
family, I addend this. WHen you take her sailing, don't ask her to do
anything. Make her as comfortable as possible. Have a bottle of wine
on board. A boc of chocolates, a good book. Ig things get dicey, don't
get mad. Just clear the decks and do what has to be done. And get your
engine fixed so it never happens again. DON'T not take her sailing when
she asks. Take fer, grit your teeth, and think of the benefits that
might come from being pleasant for the day.

Oh sure I'd bet You'd like that, being treated like royalty I suppose is
what You expect from men just because You're a female. With that type of
attitude the captain ought to throw your ass overboard. You ever hear the
word teamwork? Just like a marriage sailing is a team thing but I doubt You
comprehend that.


HAHAHAHAHA...you don't know me....I can't stand to have other people do
things for me, serve me, etc. I have noticed, thoughm that most men
have NO problem at all being catered to.

Shame and debasement
 

katy wrote:
Chi Chi wrote:
OK...after reading his explanation of the history of sailing in his
family, I addend this. WHen you take her sailing, don't ask her to do
anything. Make her as comfortable as possible. Have a bottle of wine
on board. A boc of chocolates, a good book. Ig things get dicey, don't
get mad. Just clear the decks and do what has to be done. And get your
engine fixed so it never happens again. DON'T not take her sailing when
she asks. Take fer, grit your teeth, and think of the benefits that
might come from being pleasant for the day.

Oh sure I'd bet You'd like that, being treated like royalty I suppose is
what You expect from men just because You're a female. With that type of
attitude the captain ought to throw your ass overboard. You ever hear the
word teamwork? Just like a marriage sailing is a team thing but I doubt You
comprehend that.


HAHAHAHAHA...you don't know me....I can't stand to have other people do
things for me, serve me, etc. I have noticed, thoughm that most men
have NO problem at all being catered to.

My 10 yr old daughter who likes every slimy thing there is would make
friends with the giant octopus.

Shame and debasement
 

Gilligan wrote: a bunch of mushroom induced gibberish...

you're suffering from altitude sickness....

Shame and debasement
 

Shame and debasement
 

"Seahag" wrote in message
...

"Frogwatch" wrote:
Vic Smith wrote:
wrote:


Don White wrote:
wrote:
snip..
They tow us to the dock
and I go to pay. By this time I was seriously happy to be off the
boat
with my wife so even *the astonishing cost of $480* didn't faze me
much. It was $10/ft for the ungrounding (28' sailboat) and then
$165
minimum and a couple other fees.
snip...

Whoo hoo! Around here the Coast Guard...or some friendly boater will
always come to the rescue...for free.

Re-thinking this, I regret posting it. It has me blaming my wife for
my predicament when I had nobody but myslf to blame. If I had
displayed much more confidence and a fun atitude I could probably have
talked my wife into enjoying the overnight grounding. Unfortunately, I
consider sailing to be an excercise in problem solving so I do not sail
for the same reasons she does. I DID invite her. I apologize.

Well, you had me convinced you were right the first time, and now
you've convinced me again. Have you considered sales?
I do like the second convincing more.

--Vic

I think I have gotten too confident in problem solving without taking
into account the human dimension. This is probably why I enjoy single
handed sailing.
The solution would really have been to wait. There was no danger
although it is supposed to hit 30 degrees tonight. With two cell
phones, nobody would have to worry about us. Even if the wind direcion
did not change and I was unable to rig a fuel feed. SOMEBODY would be
coming down that channel on Monday.
I sulked the entire night after it happened cuz it really hurt my
pride. I probably should go make amends.

See ya.

Yeah, it's Soooo much fun going for a pleasure sail and having to bust
one's balls tacking and rebuilding engines when all you were wanting to do
was relax before hitting the weekly grind the next day.

Godivas are good:^)

Seahag


Look at how much character could have been built, then the weekly grind
wouldn't have seemed so bad.

Shame and debasement
 

"Seahag" wrote in message
...

"Frogwatch" wrote:
Vic Smith wrote:
wrote:


Don White wrote:
wrote:
snip..
They tow us to the dock
and I go to pay. By this time I was seriously happy to be off the
boat
with my wife so even *the astonishing cost of $480* didn't faze me
much. It was $10/ft for the ungrounding (28' sailboat) and then
$165
minimum and a couple other fees.
snip...

Whoo hoo! Around here the Coast Guard...or some friendly boater will
always come to the rescue...for free.

Re-thinking this, I regret posting it. It has me blaming my wife for
my predicament when I had nobody but myslf to blame. If I had
displayed much more confidence and a fun atitude I could probably have
talked my wife into enjoying the overnight grounding. Unfortunately, I
consider sailing to be an excercise in problem solving so I do not sail
for the same reasons she does. I DID invite her. I apologize.

Well, you had me convinced you were right the first time, and now
you've convinced me again. Have you considered sales?
I do like the second convincing more.

--Vic

I think I have gotten too confident in problem solving without taking
into account the human dimension. This is probably why I enjoy single
handed sailing.
The solution would really have been to wait. There was no danger
although it is supposed to hit 30 degrees tonight. With two cell
phones, nobody would have to worry about us. Even if the wind direcion
did not change and I was unable to rig a fuel feed. SOMEBODY would be
coming down that channel on Monday.
I sulked the entire night after it happened cuz it really hurt my
pride. I probably should go make amends.

See ya.

Yeah, it's Soooo much fun going for a pleasure sail and having to bust
one's balls tacking and rebuilding engines when all you were wanting to do
was relax before hitting the weekly grind the next day.

Godivas are good:^)

Seahag


A dozen roses delivered in the morning followed by a nice dinner out will
make this bad event go away a bit faster.

Shame and debasement
 

Is this the same Gilligan who spent years on the island with Maryanne and
Ginger and didn't f..k either one?

Give me a break.

What a real man would have done is walk over to the wife, pull her
shirt/shorts off, bend her over, give her a good one. Then say "get the
anchor bitch, we seem to be hard aground".
=================================




"Gilligan" wrote in message
. ..
Leave the wife home. Obviously she can not contribute to the solution of
the problem, she can only make matters worse. Just think of what might
have happened if someone was injured or quick action was needed to prevent
catastrophe.

The icing on the cake is to mention to her how lonely her retirement will
be when you are out sailing the world - without her.

I do not understand why men are expected to cater to women's emotionally
driven whims and are expected to "apologize" for not understanding. Why
aren't women expected to understand men? Why is it assumed that women are
so handicapped? Why must men yield to this emotional terrorism?

Women are wired for dealing with children, other women and some family
matters. Men are wired for dealing with the external world - things such
as attacking beasts, danger, dinosaurs, thugs, science, sailing and the
like. In your situation there was a conflict between the manly world and
the woman's world. It looks like the costliest solution won.

It is unfortunate that the great and powerful mind of that Master Mariner
Capt Neal is not here to contribute further on this subject. I am certain
that he would add brilliant insight.

Shame and debasement
 

On Mon, 20 Nov 2006 23:27:24 GMT, "NE Sailboat"
wrote:

What a real man would have done is walk over to the wife, pull her
shirt/shorts off, bend her over, give her a good one. Then say "get the
anchor bitch, we seem to be hard aground".

And that I guess would explain your present relationship with the
inflatable Paris Hilton?

Shame and debasement
 

"Gilligan" wrote in
message . ..
Leave the wife home. Obviously she can not contribute to
the solution of the
problem, she can only make matters worse. Just think of
what might have
happened if someone was injured or quick action was needed
to prevent
catastrophe.

The icing on the cake is to mention to her how lonely her
retirement will be
when you are out sailing the world - without her.

Not married, are ya, Gilly?



I do not understand why men are expected to cater to
women's emotionally
driven whims and are expected to "apologize" for not
understanding. Why
aren't women expected to understand men? Why is it assumed
that women are so
handicapped? Why must men yield to this emotional
terrorism?


Maybe someday you'll get lucky....then you might understand.



Women are wired for dealing with children, other women and
some family
matters. Men are wired for dealing with the external
world - things such as
attacking beasts, danger, dinosaurs, thugs, science,
sailing and the like.
In your situation there was a conflict between the manly
world and the
woman's world. It looks like the costliest solution won.

It is unfortunate that the great and powerful mind of that
Master Mariner
Capt Neal is not here to contribute further on this
subject. I am certain
that he would add brilliant insight.


I believe he's batting for the other team now.

;)

Shame and debasement
 

"Scotty" wrote in message
. ..

"Gilligan" wrote in
message . ..
Leave the wife home. Obviously she can not contribute to
the solution of the
problem, she can only make matters worse. Just think of
what might have
happened if someone was injured or quick action was needed
to prevent
catastrophe.

The icing on the cake is to mention to her how lonely her
retirement will be
when you are out sailing the world - without her.

Not married, are ya, Gilly?

Not ever married, no kids and no boat! Life is bliss!





I do not understand why men are expected to cater to
women's emotionally
driven whims and are expected to "apologize" for not
understanding. Why
aren't women expected to understand men? Why is it assumed
that women are so
handicapped? Why must men yield to this emotional
terrorism?


Maybe someday you'll get lucky....then you might understand.

Maybe someday your wife will get a clue:

http://www.amazon.com/Proper-Care-Fe.../dp/0060520612

Get her one for Christmas.

From Publishers Weekly
In her newest book, Schlessinger (10 Stupid Things Women Do to Mess Up Their
Lives) relies upon her experience in private practice, radio and letters she
received from men and women in tackling the issue of women who mistreat
their men and suffer the consequences of unhappiness. The women who
criticize their husbands in the stories that Schlessinger relates are
depressed in their marriages and feel little love from their husbands.
Unabashedly asserting that man is a "very simple creature," who needs only
"direct communication, respect, appreciation, food, and good loving'" to
respond with devotion, compassion and love, this controversial marriage and
family therapist claims that every woman can achieve a deeply satisfying
marriage if she adheres to certain fundamentals men require. Preparing
dinner, caring for the children without complaint, greeting her husband with
a kiss and engaging in sexual intimacy instead of "tearing down a husband's
necessary sense of strength and importance" can result in the harmonious
marriage women crave. While many of her listeners and readers claim her
unequivocal advice has salvaged teetering marriages and improved marital
harmony, others perceive Schlessinger as a throwback to what many see as
years of female oppression in the home.
Copyright © Reed Business Information, a division of Reed Elsevier Inc. All
rights reserved.

After reading that fine book I would swear that Capt Neal himself wrote it.
Countless marriages have been saved by this book. Dr Laura sets women
straight. Plus Dr. Laura is a fine sailor who sails her boat into the berth
without the aid of a motor. David should get this book for his wife and get
sailing lessons from Dr. Laura.





Women are wired for dealing with children, other women and
some family
matters. Men are wired for dealing with the external
world - things such as
attacking beasts, danger, dinosaurs, thugs, science,
sailing and the like.
In your situation there was a conflict between the manly
world and the
woman's world. It looks like the costliest solution won.

It is unfortunate that the great and powerful mind of that
Master Mariner
Capt Neal is not here to contribute further on this
subject. I am certain
that he would add brilliant insight.


I believe he's batting for the other team now.

;)

Shame and debasement
 

Ten Things to Take From The Proper Care & Feeding of Husbands
Written by Kieran Dickinson
Published April 26, 2004
See also:
» Of Scalawags and Spies
» Book Review: XAML in a Nutshell by Lori A. MacVittie
» Book Review: F.U.B.A.R. by Sam Seder and Stephen Sherrill

Dr. Laura Schlessinger has written another book that deserves a place on the
best seller list with six of her other books, such as Ten Stupid Things
Women Do to Mess Up Their Lives and Ten Stupid Things Men Do to Mess Up
Their Lives. The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands, from this unmarried
man's perspective, is an excellent manual for women on how to get want they
want from men and marriage and, generally, how to be happy. Dr. Laura makes
a number of important, practical points, based on her experience in private
practice, from advising her radio callers, and from literally hundreds of
letters and emails she received from men and women while she was writing the
book. Here are the points that struck this writer, together with commentary:

1. Men Need Women, and This Need Gives Women Huge Influence. Dr. Laura
states the point as follows: "[M]en are simple creatures who come from a
woman, are nurtured and brought up by a woman, and yearn for the continued
love, admiration, and approval from a woman." Women have great power and
influence over men, and wives in particular have tremendous power over their
husbands. How they use this power essentially controls the relationship,
because women are the masters of most relationships and marriages. That's
why Dr. Laura says that she probably won't write The Proper Care and Feeding
of Wives: wives already have most of the power and their marriages depend,
for the most part, on them.

2. Women Err in Favoring Children Over Husband. A friend once told this
writer that once a woman has children, her husband is relegated to the moral
equivalence of a piece of furniture. How sad if this is true in many
marriages. Here's how Dr. Laura puts it: "Once wives became mothers, they
had no time to be wives. The men would even compliment their wives on being
great mothers, but expressed considerable pain over not being shown love,
affection, or sexual interest. The typical reply from a wife challenged with
this was 'I only have time to take care of one person, and our child is that
person. I'm just too tired for you.' This puts fathers in the ugly and
uncomfortable position of feeling competitive with and resentful of their
children, whom they love so much."

3. Men and Women Are Different. That men and women are deeply different
ought not to be notable, but for the fact that it is so often challenged
today. Dr. Laura says that society tries to make both men and women
"unisex." But men are happiest being men, and women are happiest being
women, with few exceptions. The differences start to manifest themselves
very early. In one study Dr. Laura mentions, a barrier was placed between 1
year-old babies and their mothers. What did the little boys do? They
attempted to get around the barrier or knock it down. The little girls? They
cried until their mothers' picked them up. Men tend to respond to things
physically, women verbally. In fact, the two sexes are just right for each
other.

4. Not Every Thought and Feeling Needs to be Said. Women tend to be so
verbal, so expressive, that they can tire out men easily unless they
exercise some restraint. Dr. Laura reports that wives generally overwhelm
their husbands with communication. "Husbands imagine (so foolishly) that
their wives are telling them something they actually need to know because
they're supposed to do something about it. Otherwise, men can't imagine why
the 'communication' is happening at all. It confuses them, frustrates them,
and their response is to turn off. That's when they unfairly become labeled
insensitive." Husbands and fiances are not girlfriends or psychologists, and
women who want attention should adjust their communication style accordingly
when speaking with them.

5. Men Are Not Mind-Readers. Most men are not very intuitive compared to
most women. Many women "get caught up in the absurdly romanticized notion
that 'if he loved me, he'd just know what I'm thinking, what I'd like, what
he should say.'" If a woman wants her man to do something, she should just
ask him plainly, without nagging, and show appreciation when he does it. To
act otherwise, as many women do, shows arrogance and lack of respect for the
husband's difference, and it leads to unhappiness in the marriage and in the
family.

6. Man Is an Embodied Soul. No, Dr. Laura didn't put it that way; "embodied
soul" is a Catholic concept. But that concept is what underlies her
discussion of how important it is to a man that his wife try to keep up her
appearance. What does it mean that we are embodied souls? It means that our
bodies are integral parts of who we are. We are not just souls. Our bodies
are not like clothing that we can take on or off. There was no time during
which we had only souls and not bodies, and in eternity as well we will have
bodies. It is through our bodies, in fact, that we communicate to our loved
ones and to the rest of the world. One thinks of the beautiful line from the
old Anglican marriage rite: bride and groom pledge to each other "with my
body I thee worship." It is ironic, but in many cases men--sex-crazed pigs
in the minds of many women--actually have a truer understanding of the
beauty of the body and the meaning of the marital embrace than their wives
do. "Objectification" may come as much or more from the woman's side as from
the husband's if the woman sees her own body as being separate from rather
than an integral part of herself. Dr. Laura writes: "In reading all the
letters from men, I was struck by their depth of senstivity about the issue
of women's appearance. It wasn't an impersonal, animal reaction (as it is
with women the men don't personally know), it was a deeply personal one. The
wife's comfort with and appreciation of her own body and femininity, and her
willingness to share that with her husband, actually fed his sense of
well-being, his feeling of being loved as a husband and valued as a 'man.'"

7. Infidelity by Omission. Brides and grooms make a number of vows, not only
of sexual fidelity. Marital vows include and imply words like love, honor,
protect, and care for. "[W]hen one breaches those vows by neglect, is that
also not a form of infidelity? Perhaps we should start looking at the act of
intentionally depriving a spouse of legitimate needs as infidelity, too,
because it stems from being unfaithful to the intent of the vows."

8. In the Bedroom. To her credit, Dr. Laura gives due place to the
importance for marriage of the marital act: "The bedroom is the foundation
of marriage and family." St. Josemaria Escriva, founder of Opus Dei, that
supposedly conservative institution within the Church, put it this way: "The
marriage bed is an altar." Enough said?

9. Women Should Appreciate Men's Masculinity. Dr. Laura relates a trip she
made recently to a swimming pool. A mom and a dad were wading with their
infant child. Mom held the child against her chest, cooed to him, and
swooped him up and down. She passed the baby to dad. He turned the baby's
face outward and swooshed him forward and up into the air. "Mom equals
protection and nurturance. Dad equals autonomy and adventure. It is the
perfect balance that helps produce a functional, secure human being." Too
many women, though, act like Alice Kramdens, constantly belitting their
husbands, shooting down their aspirations, treating them like children. Dr.
Laura writes: "When a wife treats her man like he's one of her children,
when she puts him down or thwarts his need for autonomy, adventure, risk,
competition, challenge, and conquest, she ends up with a sullen,
unooperative, unloving, hostile lump."

10. Thou Shalt Not Covet. Dr. Laura contributes a novel (to this writer) and
insightful contemporary application of the commandment, "thou shal not
covet." Specifically, she understands it as a rebuke to people who want it
all, especially feminists. "Perhaps the feminist notions about women having
power if they do it all has obstructed too many women's ability to realize
that in real life we all make choices, and that the true joy and meaning of
life is not in how many things we have or do, but in the sacrifice and
commitment we make to others within the context of the choices we've made.
The Tenth Commandment, about coveting, reminds us that none of us can have
everything there is nor everything we want. Without enjoying and
appreciating our gifts and blessings, we create a hell on earth for
ourselves and for those who love us."

Shame and debasement
 

NE Sailboat wrote:
Is this the same Gilligan who spent years on the island with Maryanne and
Ginger and didn't f..k either one?

Give me a break.

What a real man would have done is walk over to the wife, pull her
shirt/shorts off, bend her over, give her a good one. Then say "get the
anchor bitch, we seem to be hard aground".
=================================




"Gilligan" wrote in message
. ..

Leave the wife home. Obviously she can not contribute to the solution of
the problem, she can only make matters worse. Just think of what might
have happened if someone was injured or quick action was needed to prevent
catastrophe.

The icing on the cake is to mention to her how lonely her retirement will
be when you are out sailing the world - without her.

I do not understand why men are expected to cater to women's emotionally
driven whims and are expected to "apologize" for not understanding. Why
aren't women expected to understand men? Why is it assumed that women are
so handicapped? Why must men yield to this emotional terrorism?

Women are wired for dealing with children, other women and some family
matters. Men are wired for dealing with the external world - things such
as attacking beasts, danger, dinosaurs, thugs, science, sailing and the
like. In your situation there was a conflict between the manly world and
the woman's world. It looks like the costliest solution won.

It is unfortunate that the great and powerful mind of that Master Mariner
Capt Neal is not here to contribute further on this subject. I am certain
that he would add brilliant insight.




That's why so many' real' men are in jail....

Shame and debasement
 

Don White wrote in news:ZNj8h.22597$cz.344947
@ursa-nb00s0.nbnet.nb.ca:

That could be a dangerous thing to do. The wife may expect similar
offerings everytime he's wrong.



They are BORN expecting such offerings....

Shame and debasement
 

Larry wrote:
Don White wrote in news:ZNj8h.22597$cz.344947
@ursa-nb00s0.nbnet.nb.ca:


That could be a dangerous thing to do. The wife may expect similar
offerings everytime he's wrong.




They are BORN expecting such offerings....


We are born DESERVING such offerings....

Shame and debasement
 

Joe wrote:

3rd, you should have jumped in and swam out
with the anchor, dove down and planted it deep so you could kedge
yourself off.

....swam out with the anchor...?

Shame and debasement
 

"Scotty" wrote in message
...

"KLC Lewis" wrote in message
et...

"Scotty" wrote in message
. ..

"KLC Lewis" wrote in message
...

I like your second post much better, but can you think
of
any other things
you should have done differently?


When he wrote about throwing the anchor, I thought he
was
going to try to kedge off.

SBV



It's kinda funny, but no one has mentioned what started
all of this: the
engine. If one relies upon their engine to be able to get
back home or to
get out of trouble, having it "slowly stop running" should
be a matter of
concern. I believe that the first order of business
shouldn't have been
continuing the sail, but in finding out why the engine
died, and fixing it.

He did mention the fuel pump. I believe his wife failed to
replace it the night before, even though she knew it was
going to die the next day.

Scotty

That's funny!
Scout

Shame and debasement
 

-rick- wrote:
Joe wrote:

3rd, you should have jumped in and swam out
with the anchor, dove down and planted it deep so you could kedge
yourself off.

...swam out with the anchor...?
Easy - you just a cushion or pfd for flotation.

Shame and debasement
 

It is unfortunate that the great and powerful mind of that
Master Mariner
Capt Neal is not here to contribute further on this
subject. I am certain
that he would add brilliant insight.



Scotty wrote:
I believe he's batting for the other team now.

;)


Wearing a shinguards and one of those big round mitts.

DSK

Shame and debasement
 

"Jeff" wrote in message
. ..
-rick- wrote:
Joe wrote:

3rd, you should have jumped in and swam out
with the anchor, dove down and planted it deep so you could kedge
yourself off.

...swam out with the anchor...?
Easy - you just a cushion or pfd for flotation.

Oh, c'mon. You manly men wouldn't have any problem at all. You'd grab that
45# CQR, plop in on your hairy chest, and backstroke out a hundred yards.

Shame and debasement
 

...swam out with the anchor...?

Easy - you just a cushion or pfd for flotation.


KLC Lewis wrote:
Oh, c'mon. You manly men wouldn't have any problem at all. You'd grab that
45# CQR, plop in on your hairy chest, and backstroke out a hundred yards.


Oh sure, the anchor itself is no problem. It's the 20 yards
of chain that's the problem... stuff keeps getting tangled
in your legs as you're swimming....

DSK

Shame and debasement
 

There is nothing childish about what i posted, You might not agree with it
but that's Your problem. If anything about this subject is childish it is a
woman who thinks she's gods gift to men and deserves special treatment just
because she's female.
"Charlie Morgan" wrote in message
...
On Mon, 20 Nov 2006 18:12:52 GMT, "Chi Chi"
wrote:

OK...after reading his explanation of the history of sailing in his
family, I addend this. WHen you take her sailing, don't ask her to do
anything. Make her as comfortable as possible. Have a bottle of wine
on board. A boc of chocolates, a good book. Ig things get dicey, don't
get mad. Just clear the decks and do what has to be done. And get your
engine fixed so it never happens again. DON'T not take her sailing when
she asks. Take fer, grit your teeth, and think of the benefits that
might come from being pleasant for the day.

Oh sure I'd bet You'd like that, being treated like royalty I suppose is
what You expect from men just because You're a female. With that type of
attitude the captain ought to throw your ass overboard. You ever hear the
word teamwork? Just like a marriage sailing is a team thing but I doubt
You
comprehend that.


Please take your childish ranting elsewhere!

CWM

Shame and debasement
 

Hey,, there is good news ... I was just hired as the replacement comic for
Kramer out in LA.

I am standing looking in the mirror practicing .... fork/N.../N.../N..../


"Wayne.B" wrote in message
...
On Mon, 20 Nov 2006 23:27:24 GMT, "NE Sailboat"
wrote:

What a real man would have done is walk over to the wife, pull her
shirt/shorts off, bend her over, give her a good one. Then say "get the
anchor bitch, we seem to be hard aground".

And that I guess would explain your present relationship with the
inflatable Paris Hilton?

Shame and debasement
 

"DSK" wrote in message
...
...swam out with the anchor...?

Easy - you just a cushion or pfd for flotation.


KLC Lewis wrote:
Oh, c'mon. You manly men wouldn't have any problem at all. You'd grab
that 45# CQR, plop in on your hairy chest, and backstroke out a hundred
yards.

Oh sure, the anchor itself is no problem. It's the 20 yards of chain
that's the problem... stuff keeps getting tangled in your legs as you're
swimming....

DSK


Have you tried organising it around the...Samson post?

Shame and debasement
 

"KLC Lewis" wrote in message
et...

"DSK" wrote in message
...
...swam out with the anchor...?

Easy - you just a cushion or pfd for flotation.


KLC Lewis wrote:
Oh, c'mon. You manly men wouldn't have any problem at all. You'd grab
that 45# CQR, plop in on your hairy chest, and backstroke out a hundred
yards.

Oh sure, the anchor itself is no problem. It's the 20 yards of chain
that's the problem... stuff keeps getting tangled in your legs as you're
swimming....

DSK


Have you tried organising it around the...Samson post?


I hate it when all my chest hair get caught up in the anchor chain. That's
why I carry the chain in my teeth and the anchor in one hand when I swim out
to set it. To make sure I don't expend any unecessary effort trying to stay
down while setting the anchor I wear 85lbs of diver's weights. I don't
understand why any manly man would use an anchor to kedge the boat when its
aground. Why not just swim under the boat and lift it up and push it out?

Shame and debasement
 

Gilligan wrote:
"KLC Lewis" wrote in message
et...

"DSK" wrote in message
. ..

...swam out with the anchor...?

Easy - you just a cushion or pfd for flotation.

KLC Lewis wrote:

Oh, c'mon. You manly men wouldn't have any problem at all. You'd grab
that 45# CQR, plop in on your hairy chest, and backstroke out a hundred
yards.

Oh sure, the anchor itself is no problem. It's the 20 yards of chain
that's the problem... stuff keeps getting tangled in your legs as you're
swimming....

DSK


Have you tried organising it around the...Samson post?



I hate it when all my chest hair get caught up in the anchor chain. That's
why I carry the chain in my teeth and the anchor in one hand when I swim out
to set it. To make sure I don't expend any unecessary effort trying to stay
down while setting the anchor I wear 85lbs of diver's weights. I don't
understand why any manly man would use an anchor to kedge the boat when its
aground. Why not just swim under the boat and lift it up and push it out?


That's what Mr Sails does....

Shame and debasement
 

"Gilligan" wrote in message
. ..

"KLC Lewis" wrote in message
et...

"DSK" wrote in message
...
...swam out with the anchor...?

Easy - you just a cushion or pfd for flotation.


KLC Lewis wrote:
Oh, c'mon. You manly men wouldn't have any problem at all. You'd grab
that 45# CQR, plop in on your hairy chest, and backstroke out a hundred
yards.

Oh sure, the anchor itself is no problem. It's the 20 yards of chain
that's the problem... stuff keeps getting tangled in your legs as you're
swimming....

DSK


Have you tried organising it around the...Samson post?


I hate it when all my chest hair get caught up in the anchor chain. That's
why I carry the chain in my teeth and the anchor in one hand when I swim
out to set it. To make sure I don't expend any unecessary effort trying to
stay down while setting the anchor I wear 85lbs of diver's weights. I
don't understand why any manly man would use an anchor to kedge the boat
when its aground. Why not just swim under the boat and lift it up and push
it out?


You could cut the testosterone here with a knife.

Hmmmm. Not a half-bad idea, that! ;-D

Shame and debasement
 

Oh sure, the anchor itself is no problem. It's the 20 yards of chain
that's the problem... stuff keeps getting tangled in your legs as you're
swimming....


KLC Lewis wrote:
Have you tried organising it around the...Samson post?


Mine's a 24v windlass, but unfortunately it won't hold all
20 yards of chain.

Only about 18

DSK

Shame and debasement
 

"Gilligan" wrote in message
. ..

"KLC Lewis" wrote in message
et...

"DSK" wrote in message
...
...swam out with the anchor...?

Easy - you just a cushion or pfd for flotation.


KLC Lewis wrote:
Oh, c'mon. You manly men wouldn't have any problem at all. You'd grab
that 45# CQR, plop in on your hairy chest, and backstroke out a hundred
yards.

Oh sure, the anchor itself is no problem. It's the 20 yards of chain
that's the problem... stuff keeps getting tangled in your legs as you're
swimming....

DSK


Have you tried organising it around the...Samson post?


I hate it when all my chest hair get caught up in the anchor chain. That's
why I carry the chain in my teeth and the anchor in one hand when I swim
out to set it. To make sure I don't expend any unecessary effort trying to
stay down while setting the anchor I wear 85lbs of diver's weights. I
don't understand why any manly man would use an anchor to kedge the boat
when its aground. Why not just swim under the boat and lift it up and push
it out?

Gotta get the little woman to carry the anchor and chain... come on, get
with the program....

--
"j" ganz @@
www.sailnow.com

Shame and debasement
 

-rick- wrote:
Joe wrote:

3rd, you should have jumped in and swam out
with the anchor, dove down and planted it deep so you could kedge
yourself off.


...swam out with the anchor...?


...underwater of course...

Shame and debasement
 

Gilligan wrote:
"KLC Lewis" wrote in message
et...

"DSK" wrote in message
. ..

...swam out with the anchor...?

Easy - you just a cushion or pfd for flotation.

KLC Lewis wrote:

Oh, c'mon. You manly men wouldn't have any problem at all. You'd grab
that 45# CQR, plop in on your hairy chest, and backstroke out a hundred
yards.

Oh sure, the anchor itself is no problem. It's the 20 yards of chain
that's the problem... stuff keeps getting tangled in your legs as you're
swimming....

DSK


Have you tried organising it around the...Samson post?



I hate it when all my chest hair get caught up in the anchor chain. That's
why I carry the chain in my teeth and the anchor in one hand when I swim out
to set it. To make sure I don't expend any unecessary effort trying to stay
down while setting the anchor I wear 85lbs of diver's weights. I don't
understand why any manly man would use an anchor to kedge the boat when its
aground. Why not just swim under the boat and lift it up and push it out?


I suppose that's do-able with your little Optimist sailing pram.

Shame and debasement
 

Capt. JG wrote:
"Gilligan" wrote in message
. ..

"KLC Lewis" wrote in message
news:H5mdnc9YYc3RiP7YnZ2dnUVZ_qGdnZ2d@centurytel .net...

"DSK" wrote in message
.. .

...swam out with the anchor...?

Easy - you just a cushion or pfd for flotation.

KLC Lewis wrote:

Oh, c'mon. You manly men wouldn't have any problem at all. You'd grab
that 45# CQR, plop in on your hairy chest, and backstroke out a hundred
yards.

Oh sure, the anchor itself is no problem. It's the 20 yards of chain
that's the problem... stuff keeps getting tangled in your legs as you're
swimming....

DSK


Have you tried organising it around the...Samson post?


I hate it when all my chest hair get caught up in the anchor chain. That's
why I carry the chain in my teeth and the anchor in one hand when I swim
out to set it. To make sure I don't expend any unecessary effort trying to
stay down while setting the anchor I wear 85lbs of diver's weights. I
don't understand why any manly man would use an anchor to kedge the boat
when its aground. Why not just swim under the boat and lift it up and push
it out?


Gotta get the little woman to carry the anchor and chain... come on, get
with the program....

"little woman"? oh man...you have sunk lower than low...

Shame and debasement
 

Mean, low, low actually.

--
"j" ganz @@
www.sailnow.com

"katy" wrote in message
...
Capt. JG wrote:
"Gilligan" wrote in message
. ..

"KLC Lewis" wrote in message
news:H5mdnc9YYc3RiP7YnZ2dnUVZ_qGdnZ2d@centuryte l.net...

"DSK" wrote in message
. ..

...swam out with the anchor...?

Easy - you just a cushion or pfd for flotation.

KLC Lewis wrote:

Oh, c'mon. You manly men wouldn't have any problem at all. You'd grab
that 45# CQR, plop in on your hairy chest, and backstroke out a
hundred yards.

Oh sure, the anchor itself is no problem. It's the 20 yards of chain
that's the problem... stuff keeps getting tangled in your legs as
you're swimming....

DSK


Have you tried organising it around the...Samson post?


I hate it when all my chest hair get caught up in the anchor chain.
That's why I carry the chain in my teeth and the anchor in one hand when
I swim out to set it. To make sure I don't expend any unecessary effort
trying to stay down while setting the anchor I wear 85lbs of diver's
weights. I don't understand why any manly man would use an anchor to
kedge the boat when its aground. Why not just swim under the boat and
lift it up and push it out?


Gotta get the little woman to carry the anchor and chain... come on, get
with the program....

"little woman"? oh man...you have sunk lower than low...