"Harry Krause" wrote in message
...

Tom Cruise's Sister to Join Bush Staff

One day after Tom Cruise replaced his sister Lee Anne DeVette as his
publicist, Ms. DeVette staged a stunning professional comeback, announcing
she has joined President George W. Bush's staff as a top political
advisor.

It was an astonishing personal coup for Ms. DeVette, who has no political
experience and whose tenure as Mr. Cruise's publicist was characterized
mainly by erratic public appearances and controversial outbursts by the
talkative actor.

But according to one White House aide, the decision to add Ms. DeVette was
a "no brainer": "Lee Ann doesn't have as much baggage as Karl does, and
with our poll numbers as low as they are, we had to start thinking outside
the box."

On Ms. DeVette's first day on the job, Mr. Bush appeared on NBC's "Today
Show," where he lectured host Matt Lauer about the evils of economics,
telling him at one point, "I've done the research, and economics is not a
real science."

Later in the day, the president appeared on "Oprah," where he jumped up
and down on host Oprah Winfrey's couch and proclaimed his love for First
Lady Laura Bush while a visibly alarmed Ms. Winfrey looked on.

But according to Buddy Schlantz, a veteran talent agent and longtime
observer of the Hollywood scene, Ms. DeVette's work has only begun: "If
those approval ratings don't go up soon, expect the president to announce
that he's marrying Scarlett Johansson and she's having his baby."


-- Andy Borowitz

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