Harry Krause wrote:
WHITE HOUSE STAFFERS PLAN TO INFILTRATE AL QAEDA
Will Leak Bin Laden's Precise Location to the Press

According to a top-secret plan being developed by the Bush
administration, high ranking White House staffers intend to infiltrate
al Qaeda in the hopes of leaking Osama bin Laden's precise location to
the press.

The plan, codenamed Operation Blabbermouth, was hatched over the weekend
after a marathon discussion concerning the ongoing CIA leak scandal, a
source inside the White House said today.

"We decided that instead of wringing our hands about leaking the name of
that CIA operative, why not put out ability to leak information to
positive use?" the source said. "After all, leaking is the one thing
we're really good at."

The source said that White House staffers are currently undergoing
training in the hopes of infiltrating al Qaeda by year's end: "We intend
to infiltrate al Qaeda as completely as Halliburton has infiltrated the
White House."

Once close to bin Laden, the source said, the White House staffers will
immediately place phone calls to newspaper reporters to leak the
madman's precise location: "We're all going to have Judy Miller on
speed-dial,"

Counterterrorism expert Richard Clarke, while praising Operation
Blabbermouth for its inventiveness, said that the plan has one major
flaw: "In order for a plan like that to work, it would have to be kept
totally secret, and they've already leaked it to the press."

In response to Mr. Clarke's criticism, the White House source offered
this response: "Oops."

From Andy Borowitz.

Won't happen. The White House won't pull the trigger on Osama bin
Ladin, (or even reveal his well-known exact location), until he has
outlived his usefulness. The death of OBL would cause too many people
to conclude the "war on terror" was somehow over.


Did you see the latest "twist" in the proposed legislation to extend
the Patriot Act? The Administration wants to introduce at least double,
and maybe even triple or multiple jeopardy! Under the proposed changes,
prosecutors would be allowed to appeal verdicts where judges or juries
found people "not guilty", and there is a specific provision for
prosecutors to appeal the penalty decisions of judges and juries in
capital cases. If the prosecution doesn't get a "guilty" verdict, it
will be able to just retry the case over, and over, and over, and over
until some judge or jury makes the "right" decision. Prosecutors will
be allowed to appeal penalties in cases where the jury debates between
life in prison or death for a convicted prisoner and doesn't decide on
the death penalty.

They may as well make all future printings of the Constitution
available on 5-inch rolls, single or double ply. :-(

On Wed, 26 Oct 2005 17:30:06 -0700, chuckgould.chuck wrote:


Did you see the latest "twist" in the proposed legislation to extend the
Patriot Act?

While it isn't the Patriot Act, it's nice to see the Bush administration
trying to keep college tuition down. ;-)

http://www.truthout.org/docs_2005/102305G.shtml