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Old June 11th 19, 12:50 PM posted to
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Default How To Live Longer

George goes to the doctor after getting some very bad news about his condition.

Doctor: “Unfortunately sir, you have only 1 week to live.”

George: “Doctor, what on Earth are you saying?”, clearly shocked.

“What can I do to live at least a little longer? I don’t have any family but I really want to finish all the tv shows I’m watching.”

Doctor: “Well, do you eat greasy and fried food?”

George: “Yes.”

Doctor: “Stop doing that.”

George: “If I’ll live longer, sure!”

Doctor: “Do you drink sodas and eat fast food?”

George: “Yes.”

Doctor: “Stop doing that.”

George: “If it allows me to live longer, sure.”

Doctor: “Do you stay up late?”

George: “Most nights.”

Doctor: “Stop doing that.”

George: “Alright, done.”

Doctor: “Do you have sex often?”

George: “Yes. A lot.”

Doctor: “Stop doing that.”

George: “Well, I guess, if it means living longer.”

Doctor: “Do you smoke?”

George: “Yes.”

Doctor: “Stop doing that.”

George: “If it allows me to live longer, I will.”

Doctor: “Do you drink?”

George: “Yes…”

Doctor: “Stop doing that.”

George: “OK Doctor, but you didn’t tell me, if I do all the things you told me to do, how much longer will I live?”

Doctor: “You’ll still only live a week… but it will seem like a decade.”

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