Paddlec1 wrote:

With luck like that the guy needs to buy some lottery tickets.

Yeah, reminds me of a track on a Bert & I record, where a guy tries to
commit suicide (imagine a Maine accent):

Lost all my money in the stock market last week, so I decided to
end it all. Bought a horse pistol, a gallon of gasoline, matches,
carbolic acid, and a length of rope. Went down to the river below town.
I tied one end of the rope to a stout tree branch, and the other end
around my neck. After dousing myself with gasoline, I lit a match,
and swung out over the river. I put the pistol to my head and fired.
The shot went wide, severing the rope. So I fell into the river,
dousing the flames. I swallowed so much water that I spat up all the
carbolic acid. And you know, if I hadn't been such a damn good swimmer,
I might've drowned!