A vet has applied for a job with the USG and after his application is
reviewed and accepted, goes to the interview in Washington DC.

The interviewer asks him, 'Are you allergic to anything?'

He answers 'Yes - caffeine'

'Have you ever been in the services?'

'Yes,' he says. 'I was in the Army and served 3 tours in Iraq.'

The interviewer says, 'That will give you 5 extra points toward employment,'
and then asks, 'are you disabled in any way?

The guy says, 'Yes ...a bomb exploded near me and blew my testicles off.'

The interviewer tells the guy, 'O.K. In that case, I can hire you right now.

Normal hours are from 8 AM to 4 PM.

You can start tomorrow at 10 AM - and plan on starting at 10 AM every day.'

The guy is puzzled and says, 'If the hours are from 8 AM to 4 PM, why don't
you want me to be here before 10 AM?'

'This is a government job,' the interviewer says. 'For the first two hours
we just stand around drinking coffee and scratching our balls, not really
any point in you coming in for that.

On 7/28/10 10:38 AM, mmc wrote:
A vet has applied for a job with the USG and after his application is
reviewed and accepted, goes to the interview in Washington DC.

The interviewer asks him, 'Are you allergic to anything?'

He answers 'Yes - caffeine'

'Have you ever been in the services?'

'Yes,' he says. 'I was in the Army and served 3 tours in Iraq.'

The interviewer says, 'That will give you 5 extra points toward employment,'
and then asks, 'are you disabled in any way?

The guy says, 'Yes ...a bomb exploded near me and blew my testicles off.'

The interviewer tells the guy, 'O.K. In that case, I can hire you right now.

Normal hours are from 8 AM to 4 PM.

You can start tomorrow at 10 AM - and plan on starting at 10 AM every day.'

The guy is puzzled and says, 'If the hours are from 8 AM to 4 PM, why don't
you want me to be here before 10 AM?'

'This is a government job,' the interviewer says. 'For the first two hours
we just stand around drinking coffee and scratching our balls, not really
any point in you coming in for that.




D'oh. Are you self-employed? No? Are you at work? Yes? Are you cheating
your employer right now?

"Harry ?" wrote in message
m...
On 7/28/10 10:38 AM, mmc wrote:
A vet has applied for a job with the USG and after his application is
reviewed and accepted, goes to the interview in Washington DC.

The interviewer asks him, 'Are you allergic to anything?'

He answers 'Yes - caffeine'

'Have you ever been in the services?'

'Yes,' he says. 'I was in the Army and served 3 tours in Iraq.'

The interviewer says, 'That will give you 5 extra points toward
employment,'
and then asks, 'are you disabled in any way?

The guy says, 'Yes ...a bomb exploded near me and blew my testicles off.'

The interviewer tells the guy, 'O.K. In that case, I can hire you right
now.

Normal hours are from 8 AM to 4 PM.

You can start tomorrow at 10 AM - and plan on starting at 10 AM every
day.'

The guy is puzzled and says, 'If the hours are from 8 AM to 4 PM, why
don't
you want me to be here before 10 AM?'

'This is a government job,' the interviewer says. 'For the first two
hours
we just stand around drinking coffee and scratching our balls, not really
any point in you coming in for that.




D'oh. Are you self-employed? No? Are you at work? Yes? Are you cheating
your employer right now?

D'oh. Isn't he retired?

--
Me

"mmc" wrote in message
g.com...
A vet has applied for a job with the USG and after his application is
reviewed and accepted, goes to the interview in Washington DC.

The interviewer asks him, 'Are you allergic to anything?'

He answers 'Yes - caffeine'

'Have you ever been in the services?'

'Yes,' he says. 'I was in the Army and served 3 tours in Iraq.'

The interviewer says, 'That will give you 5 extra points toward
employment,'
and then asks, 'are you disabled in any way?

The guy says, 'Yes ...a bomb exploded near me and blew my testicles off.'

The interviewer tells the guy, 'O.K. In that case, I can hire you right
now.

Normal hours are from 8 AM to 4 PM.

You can start tomorrow at 10 AM - and plan on starting at 10 AM every
day.'

The guy is puzzled and says, 'If the hours are from 8 AM to 4 PM, why
don't
you want me to be here before 10 AM?'

'This is a government job,' the interviewer says. 'For the first two hours
we just stand around drinking coffee and scratching our balls, not really
any point in you coming in for that.



So, when you show up at 8am, what happens when you decline the coffee and
scratch your chin?

On 28-Jul-2010, "nom=de=plume" wrote:

'This is a government job,' the interviewer says. 'For the first two
hours
we just stand around drinking coffee and scratching our balls, not
really
any point in you coming in for that.



So, when you show up at 8am, what happens when you decline the coffee and
scratch your chin?

You get appointed to Buckwheat's cabinet.

"Colonel Kurtz" wrote in message
...

On 28-Jul-2010, "nom=de=plume" wrote:

'This is a government job,' the interviewer says. 'For the first two
hours
we just stand around drinking coffee and scratching our balls, not
really
any point in you coming in for that.



So, when you show up at 8am, what happens when you decline the coffee and
scratch your chin?

You get appointed to Buckwheat's cabinet.

You forgot to include your KKK signature.

On 28-Jul-2010, "nom=de=plume" wrote:

So, when you show up at 8am, what happens when you decline the coffee
and
scratch your chin?

You get appointed to Buckwheat's cabinet.

You forgot to include your KKK signature.

Sorry - that would circumvent the requirement for security clearance for the
appointment, right?

"Colonel Kurtz" wrote in message
...

On 28-Jul-2010, "nom=de=plume" wrote:

So, when you show up at 8am, what happens when you decline the coffee
and
scratch your chin?

You get appointed to Buckwheat's cabinet.

You forgot to include your KKK signature.

Sorry - that would circumvent the requirement for security clearance for
the
appointment, right?

Ahhhh... ok, I get it.

On 28/07/2010 11:43 AM, nom=de=plume wrote:

"mmc" wrote in message
g.com...
A vet has applied for a job with the USG and after his application is
reviewed and accepted, goes to the interview in Washington DC.

The interviewer asks him, 'Are you allergic to anything?'

He answers 'Yes - caffeine'

'Have you ever been in the services?'

'Yes,' he says. 'I was in the Army and served 3 tours in Iraq.'

The interviewer says, 'That will give you 5 extra points toward
employment,'
and then asks, 'are you disabled in any way?

The guy says, 'Yes ...a bomb exploded near me and blew my testicles off.'

The interviewer tells the guy, 'O.K. In that case, I can hire you
right now.

Normal hours are from 8 AM to 4 PM.

You can start tomorrow at 10 AM - and plan on starting at 10 AM every
day.'

The guy is puzzled and says, 'If the hours are from 8 AM to 4 PM, why
don't
you want me to be here before 10 AM?'

'This is a government job,' the interviewer says. 'For the first two
hours we just stand around drinking coffee and scratching our balls,
not really any point in you coming in for that.



So, when you show up at 8am, what happens when you decline the coffee
and scratch your chin?

They will try to run you off. Especially if you work.

Managers are a different breed, always seem to make the right decision 2
weeks after the right decision is obsolete.

--
Marxism and socialism, leveling the field to the common denominator of
poverty.
China is now more capitalistic than USA...no wonder they are doing well.

"Canuck57" wrote in message
...
On 28/07/2010 11:43 AM, nom=de=plume wrote:

"mmc" wrote in message
g.com...
A vet has applied for a job with the USG and after his application is
reviewed and accepted, goes to the interview in Washington DC.

The interviewer asks him, 'Are you allergic to anything?'

He answers 'Yes - caffeine'

'Have you ever been in the services?'

'Yes,' he says. 'I was in the Army and served 3 tours in Iraq.'

The interviewer says, 'That will give you 5 extra points toward
employment,'
and then asks, 'are you disabled in any way?

The guy says, 'Yes ...a bomb exploded near me and blew my testicles
off.'

The interviewer tells the guy, 'O.K. In that case, I can hire you
right now.

Normal hours are from 8 AM to 4 PM.

You can start tomorrow at 10 AM - and plan on starting at 10 AM every
day.'

The guy is puzzled and says, 'If the hours are from 8 AM to 4 PM, why
don't
you want me to be here before 10 AM?'

'This is a government job,' the interviewer says. 'For the first two
hours we just stand around drinking coffee and scratching our balls,
not really any point in you coming in for that.



So, when you show up at 8am, what happens when you decline the coffee
and scratch your chin?

They will try to run you off. Especially if you work.

Managers are a different breed, always seem to make the right decision 2
weeks after the right decision is obsolete.

--
Marxism and socialism, leveling the field to the common denominator of
poverty.
China is now more capitalistic than USA...no wonder they are doing well.

In your case, they would be astonished if you could talk and scratch at the
same time!