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Canada Olympics questions from USA
The questions were posted to an international information site by
Looney/Flatulent Jim/Ditzy Dan types from the US. Smart alec answers provided for amusement. Now that Vancouver is hosting the 2010 Winter Olympics, these are some questions people from all over the world are asking. Believe it or not these questions about Canada were posted on an International Tourism Website. Obviously the answers are a joke; but the questions were really asked! Q: Will I be able to see Polar Bears in the street? ( USA ) A: Depends on how much you've been drinking Q: Can you give me some information about hippo racing in Canada ? ( USA ) A: A-fri-ca is the big triangle shaped continent south of Europe Ca-na-da is that big country to your North...oh forget it. Sure, the hippo racing is every Tuesday night in Calgary Come naked. Q: Which direction is North in Canada ? ( USA ) A: Face south and then turn 180 degrees Contact us when you get here and we'll send the rest of the directions Q: Can you send me the Vienna Boys' Choir schedule? ( USA ) A: Aus-t ri-a is that quaint little country bordering Ger-man-y, which is...oh forget it. Sure, the Vienna Boys Choir plays every Tuesday night in Vancouver and in Calgary , straight after the hippo races. Come naked. Q: I have developed a new product that is the fountain of youth. Where can I sell it in Canada ? ( USA ) A: Anywhere significant numbers of Americans gather Q: I have a question about a famous animal in Canada , but I forget its name. It's a kind of big horse with horns. ( USA ) A: It's called a Moose. They are tall and very violent, eating the brains of anyone walking close to them. You can scare them off by spraying yourself with human urine before you go out walking. Q: Will I be able to speak English most places I go? ( USA ) A: Yes, but you will have to learn it first. |
Canada Olympics questions from USA
Don White wrote:
The questions were posted to an international information site by Looney/Flatulent Jim/Ditzy Dan types from the US. Smart alec answers provided for amusement. Now that Vancouver is hosting the 2010 Winter Olympics, these are some questions people from all over the world are asking. Believe it or not these questions about Canada were posted on an International Tourism Website. Obviously the answers are a joke; but the questions were really asked! Q: Will I be able to see Polar Bears in the street? ( USA ) A: Depends on how much you've been drinking Q: Can you give me some information about hippo racing in Canada ? ( USA ) A: A-fri-ca is the big triangle shaped continent south of Europe Ca-na-da is that big country to your North...oh forget it. Sure, the hippo racing is every Tuesday night in Calgary Come naked. Q: Which direction is North in Canada ? ( USA ) A: Face south and then turn 180 degrees Contact us when you get here and we'll send the rest of the directions Q: Can you send me the Vienna Boys' Choir schedule? ( USA ) A: Aus-t ri-a is that quaint little country bordering Ger-man-y, which is...oh forget it. Sure, the Vienna Boys Choir plays every Tuesday night in Vancouver and in Calgary , straight after the hippo races. Come naked. Q: I have developed a new product that is the fountain of youth. Where can I sell it in Canada ? ( USA ) A: Anywhere significant numbers of Americans gather Q: I have a question about a famous animal in Canada , but I forget its name. It's a kind of big horse with horns. ( USA ) A: It's called a Moose. They are tall and very violent, eating the brains of anyone walking close to them. You can scare them off by spraying yourself with human urine before you go out walking. Q: Will I be able to speak English most places I go? ( USA ) A: Yes, but you will have to learn it first. Wow, it does seem that your entire country suffers from a severe case of inferiority complex. What's it like to know you are nothing more than an unwanted stepsister. |
Canada Olympics questions from USA
On 15/01/2010 7:51 PM, Don White wrote:
They were all funny but being familiar with the bush... Q: Which direction is North in Canada ? ( USA ) A: Face south and then turn 180 degrees Contact us when you get here and we'll send the rest of the directions Not right. Depends where int eh US you are. That can get you lost. Magneting north is not geo north. If you are in say Alaska, north on a compass is more east than north. There is actually a zone where the compass will read south yet you are going north. Ya, I know, too hard for Harry, an American to understand. Sarah Palin would, she has seen more of the US than most Americans and knows the US does not begin in NY at Citibank and ends in GM-Detriot with a blow hard at Harvard. |
Canada Olympics questions from USA
Canuck57 wrote:
On 15/01/2010 7:51 PM, Don White wrote: They were all funny but being familiar with the bush... Q: Which direction is North in Canada ? ( USA ) A: Face south and then turn 180 degrees Contact us when you get here and we'll send the rest of the directions Not right. Depends where int eh US you are. That can get you lost. Magneting north is not geo north. If you are in say Alaska, north on a compass is more east than north. There is actually a zone where the compass will read south yet you are going north. Ya, I know, too hard for Harry, an American to understand. Sarah Palin would, she has seen more of the US than most Americans and knows the US does not begin in NY at Citibank and ends in GM-Detriot with a blow hard at Harvard. Hey, did I tell you I donated $100,000 and my young bride to Haiti? Don't give me any ****. |
Canada Olympics questions from USA
On Jan 15, 10:02*pm, Harry Krause wrote:
Don White wrote: The questions were posted to an international information site by Looney/Flatulent Jim/Ditzy Dan types from the US. *Smart alec answers provided for amusement. Now that Vancouver is hosting the * 2010 Winter *Olympics, these are some questions people from all over the world are asking. Believe it or not these questions about Canada were posted on an International Tourism Website. Obviously the answers are a joke; but the questions were really asked! Q: Will I be able to see Polar Bears in the street? ( USA ) A: Depends on how much you've been drinking Q: Can you give me some information about hippo racing in Canada ? ( USA ) A: A-fri-ca is the big triangle shaped continent south of Europe * Ca-na-da is that big country to your North...oh forget it. Sure, the hippo racing is every Tuesday night in Calgary *Come naked. Q: Which direction is North in Canada ? ( USA ) A: Face south and then turn 180 degrees Contact us when you get here and we'll send the rest of the directions Q: Can you send me the Vienna Boys' Choir schedule? ( USA ) A: Aus-t ri-a is that quaint little country bordering Ger-man-y, which is...oh forget it. *Sure, the Vienna Boys Choir plays every Tuesday night in Vancouver and in Calgary , straight after the hippo races. Come naked. Q: I have developed a new product that is the fountain of youth. *Where can I sell it in Canada ? ( USA ) A: Anywhere significant numbers of Americans gather Q: I have a question about a famous animal in Canada , but I forget its name. It's a kind of big horse with horns. ( USA ) A: It's called a Moose. They are tall and very violent, eating the brains of anyone walking close to them. You can scare them off by spraying yourself with human urine before you go out walking. *Q: Will I be able to speak English most places I go? ( USA ) A: Yes, but you will have to learn it first. Wow, it does seem that your entire country suffers from a severe case of inferiority complex. What's it like to know you are nothing more than an unwanted stepsister. That statement compares about the same as you knowing you're a useless member of the American Society * This NG needs John Herring like we all need Hemorrhoids * |
Canada Olympics questions from USA
Harry Krause wrote:
Canuck57 wrote: On 15/01/2010 7:51 PM, Don White wrote: They were all funny but being familiar with the bush... Q: Which direction is North in Canada ? ( USA ) A: Face south and then turn 180 degrees Contact us when you get here and we'll send the rest of the directions Not right. Depends where int eh US you are. That can get you lost. Magneting north is not geo north. If you are in say Alaska, north on a compass is more east than north. There is actually a zone where the compass will read south yet you are going north. Ya, I know, too hard for Harry, an American to understand. Sarah Palin would, she has seen more of the US than most Americans and knows the US does not begin in NY at Citibank and ends in GM-Detriot with a blow hard at Harvard. Hey, did I tell you I donated $100,000 and my young bride to Haiti? Don't give me any ****. Did I forget to mention that Sarah Palin is one hot chic? |
Canada Olympics questions from USA
*e#c wrote:
On Jan 15, 10:02 pm, Harry Krause wrote: Don White wrote: The questions were posted to an international information site by Looney/Flatulent Jim/Ditzy Dan types from the US. Smart alec answers provided for amusement. Now that Vancouver is hosting the 2010 Winter Olympics, these are some questions people from all over the world are asking. Believe it or not these questions about Canada were posted on an International Tourism Website. Obviously the answers are a joke; but the questions were really asked! Q: Will I be able to see Polar Bears in the street? ( USA ) A: Depends on how much you've been drinking Q: Can you give me some information about hippo racing in Canada ? ( USA ) A: A-fri-ca is the big triangle shaped continent south of Europe Ca-na-da is that big country to your North...oh forget it. Sure, the hippo racing is every Tuesday night in Calgary Come naked. Q: Which direction is North in Canada ? ( USA ) A: Face south and then turn 180 degrees Contact us when you get here and we'll send the rest of the directions Q: Can you send me the Vienna Boys' Choir schedule? ( USA ) A: Aus-t ri-a is that quaint little country bordering Ger-man-y, which is...oh forget it. Sure, the Vienna Boys Choir plays every Tuesday night in Vancouver and in Calgary , straight after the hippo races. Come naked. Q: I have developed a new product that is the fountain of youth. Where can I sell it in Canada ? ( USA ) A: Anywhere significant numbers of Americans gather Q: I have a question about a famous animal in Canada , but I forget its name. It's a kind of big horse with horns. ( USA ) A: It's called a Moose. They are tall and very violent, eating the brains of anyone walking close to them. You can scare them off by spraying yourself with human urine before you go out walking. Q: Will I be able to speak English most places I go? ( USA ) A: Yes, but you will have to learn it first. Wow, it does seem that your entire country suffers from a severe case of inferiority complex. What's it like to know you are nothing more than an unwanted stepsister. That statement compares about the same as you knowing you're a useless member of the American Society * This NG needs John Herring like we all need Hemorrhoids * A little Canadian Humor from northeast of Detroit? |
Canada Olympics questions from USA
On 15/01/2010 8:55 PM, Harry Krause wrote:
Canuck57 wrote: On 15/01/2010 7:51 PM, Don White wrote: They were all funny but being familiar with the bush... Q: Which direction is North in Canada ? ( USA ) A: Face south and then turn 180 degrees Contact us when you get here and we'll send the rest of the directions Not right. Depends where int eh US you are. That can get you lost. Magneting north is not geo north. If you are in say Alaska, north on a compass is more east than north. There is actually a zone where the compass will read south yet you are going north. Ya, I know, too hard for Harry, an American to understand. Sarah Palin would, she has seen more of the US than most Americans and knows the US does not begin in NY at Citibank and ends in GM-Detriot with a blow hard at Harvard. Hey, did I tell you I donated $100,000 and my young bride to Haiti? Don't give me any ****. FoS. |
Canada Olympics questions from USA
Canuck57 wrote:
On 15/01/2010 8:55 PM, Harry Krause wrote: Canuck57 wrote: On 15/01/2010 7:51 PM, Don White wrote: They were all funny but being familiar with the bush... Q: Which direction is North in Canada ? ( USA ) A: Face south and then turn 180 degrees Contact us when you get here and we'll send the rest of the directions Not right. Depends where int eh US you are. That can get you lost. Magneting north is not geo north. If you are in say Alaska, north on a compass is more east than north. There is actually a zone where the compass will read south yet you are going north. Ya, I know, too hard for Harry, an American to understand. Sarah Palin would, she has seen more of the US than most Americans and knows the US does not begin in NY at Citibank and ends in GM-Detriot with a blow hard at Harvard. Hey, did I tell you I donated $100,000 and my young bride to Haiti? Don't give me any ****. FoS. OK, she is not that young. |
Canada Olympics questions from USA
Don White wrote:
The questions were posted to an international information site by Looney/Flatulent Jim/Ditzy Dan types from the US. Smart alec answers provided for amusement. Now that Vancouver is hosting the 2010 Winter Olympics, these are some questions people from all over the world are asking. Believe it or not these questions about Canada were posted on an International Tourism Website. Obviously the answers are a joke; but the questions were really asked! Q: Will I be able to see Polar Bears in the street? ( USA ) A: Depends on how much you've been drinking Q: Can you give me some information about hippo racing in Canada ? ( USA ) A: A-fri-ca is the big triangle shaped continent south of Europe Ca-na-da is that big country to your North...oh forget it. Sure, the hippo racing is every Tuesday night in Calgary Come naked. Q: Which direction is North in Canada ? ( USA ) A: Face south and then turn 180 degrees Contact us when you get here and we'll send the rest of the directions Q: Can you send me the Vienna Boys' Choir schedule? ( USA ) A: Aus-t ri-a is that quaint little country bordering Ger-man-y, which is...oh forget it. Sure, the Vienna Boys Choir plays every Tuesday night in Vancouver and in Calgary , straight after the hippo races. Come naked. Q: I have developed a new product that is the fountain of youth. Where can I sell it in Canada ? ( USA ) A: Anywhere significant numbers of Americans gather Q: I have a question about a famous animal in Canada , but I forget its name. It's a kind of big horse with horns. ( USA ) A: It's called a Moose. They are tall and very violent, eating the brains of anyone walking close to them. You can scare them off by spraying yourself with human urine before you go out walking. Q: Will I be able to speak English most places I go? ( USA ) A: Yes, but you will have to learn it first. Bull****. |
Canada Olympics questions from USA
I have heard this stereotypes about stereotypes from Canadians.
And it does speaks volumes about Canadian inferiority complex. I often did ask them (with obviouse sarcasm) if they live in a igloo and than I watch them defending their county with a foam around their mouth. and THAT it's trully hillariouse. Then some questions may be legit. Will I be able to speak English most places I go? Obviously the person meant to "communicate" (By the way not everyone in the USA native english speaker) Would you be able to communicate in Swedish most places you go in Finland? (a country with two languages as well???) Most Canadians won't answer me that! Anyhow this list is not the canadian humor as it has been cirulated before with other countries. Here is more on this list http://www.snopes.com/travel/foreign/olympics.asp By the way do you have Google in Canada.... seemd like no one on this board know how to use it :) Cheers. P.S. Just so you don't misguide your verbal fury I am not American. I am Russian. |
Canada Olympics questions from USA
On Thu, 11 Feb 2010 08:06:32 -0800 (PST), staseman
wrote: I have heard this stereotypes about stereotypes from Canadians. And it does speaks volumes about Canadian inferiority complex. I often did ask them (with obviouse sarcasm) if they live in a igloo and than I watch them defending their county with a foam around their mouth. and THAT it's trully hillariouse. Then some questions may be legit. Will I be able to speak English most places I go? Obviously the person meant to "communicate" (By the way not everyone in the USA native english speaker) Would you be able to communicate in Swedish most places you go in Finland? (a country with two languages as well???) Most Canadians won't answer me that! Anyhow this list is not the canadian humor as it has been cirulated before with other countries. Here is more on this list http://www.snopes.com/travel/foreign/olympics.asp By the way do you have Google in Canada.... seemd like no one on this board know how to use it :) Cheers. P.S. Just so you don't misguide your verbal fury I am not American. I am Russian. There's nothing wrong with most Russians. I have a good friend going to the St. Petersburg State University. Most Canadians I've met are super people, with a great sense of humor. But, there exists the rare exception to that rule. -- "Your honor can never be taken from you. Cherish it, in yourself and in others." (Unknown) John H |
Canada Olympics questions from USA
On 11/02/2010 9:06 AM, staseman wrote:
I have heard this stereotypes about stereotypes from Canadians. And it does speaks volumes about Canadian inferiority complex. I often did ask them (with obviouse sarcasm) if they live in a igloo and than I watch them defending their county with a foam around their mouth. and THAT it's trully hillariouse. Then some questions may be legit. Will I be able to speak English most places I go? Yep. While Microsoft gets this wrong with the keyboard layout, Alt-Shift to fix you can do english. In BC, the next most popular languages are chinese so bone up on Madarin or Cantonese. Obviously the person meant to "communicate" (By the way not everyone in the USA native english speaker) True, but spanish and *******ized french will not work in BC. Would you be able to communicate in Swedish most places you go in Finland? (a country with two languages as well???) Most Canadians won't answer me that! I could, verbally yes. Written and in small town TV stations with not english, no way. Anyhow this list is not the canadian humor as it has been cirulated before with other countries. Here is more on this list http://www.snopes.com/travel/foreign/olympics.asp Funny. I did have Americans looking for the ski hill in July once, I pointed to it, looked at their car with jackets, boots in the back and skis on the top, fell down laughing my ass off, it was 90F in the shade. By the way do you have Google in Canada.... seemd like no one on this board know how to use it :) Sure do, use google all the time: http://whatwouldjackdo.net/assets_c/...mb-540x484.jpg Cheers. P.S. Just so you don't misguide your verbal fury I am not American. I am Russian. |
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