....got raptured:

In Partial Rapture, Credible Republican Candidates Vanish From Earth
Gingrich Left Behind

NEW YORK (The Borowitz Report) – In what some fundamentalist preachers
are calling a “partial Rapture,” all credible candidates for the 2012
Republican nomination have mysteriously vanished from Earth.

While this seemingly Biblical phenomenon has been developing over the
past several months, the disappearance of Indiana Gov. Mitch Daniels
over the weekend confirmed what many apocalyptic prophets had been
predicting: a partial Rapture was underway.

For Rev. Harold Camping, the minister who made headlines by predicting
that the entire world would end on May 21, the partial Rapture offered
some measure of vindication, he said.

“The world really did end, Republican-wise, when Daniels dropped out of
the race of May 22,” he said. “So I was only off by one day.”

According to Camping’s prophecy, Republicans with a shot of winning the
White House have completely vanished from the face of the Earth while a
series of surefire losers have been “left behind,” including Herman
Cain, the former chairman of the Godfather’s Pizza chain, who announced
his candidacy – significantly, Camping notes – “on May 21.”

As for the Biblical prophecy that those left behind after the Rapture
faced “five months of Hell on Earth, Camping said, “That’s a pretty
clear reference to what Newt Gingrich has in store.”