In article 82292915-a887-4073-8cb6-fd099c55b5ae@
5g2000yqz.googlegroups.com, says...

Because he was unemployed, Goober Krause hung around the barber shop
all day, every day.

Even though his last check for a haircut bounced, the barbers let
Goober
hang around for entertainment value. They all knew his tales of
adventure and self importance were fabricated, but the barbers and
customers got a laugh out of Goober's tall tales.


Then one day Goober didn't show up at the barber shop. Some said
he .... (to be continued with your suggestions.)

was much too classy, intelligent, honest, and had such nice things, the
best of everything, that he didn't have to go to the barber shop. He
would have the best barbers come to him, because he knows all of the
highest ranking pols and can't be out in public.