On Fri, 20 Feb 2009 09:51:26 -0500, "Wilbur Hubbard"
wrote:

How is sailing failure defined?

Let me count the ways.

1) Joe of Red Cloud infamy
2) Bruce at the Bangkok dock
3) Capt. J.G. the netKKKop
4) Bobsprit the dreamer
5) Doug King the trawler queen
6) Sea Hag the chronic builder
7) Katysails the blind (in more ways than one)
8) Dave the lawyer who doesn't even own a boat
9) KCL Lewis the admiral
10) Bob the wannabe deck hand

Actually, you left one bloke off the list - the Amazing Willbur

Each of these failures will be individually discussed below. They represent
the various ways folks can become sailing failures. The pitfalls are easily
pigeonholed. They seem to fall into categories and the failures are
certainly not original in any way. Rather, they are stereotypical and
represent thousands of wannabe sailors the world over.

0) The Amazing Wilbur - hides his light under a fictitious and
Internet address. Alleges he owns several large and expensive yachts
and gives lessons on saving money by stealing from Walmart - a venue
that is seldom visited by chaps who have the dosh to buy a 65 ft.
sailing yacht.
Gives advise to all and sundry - frequently incorrect, the famous
"oars must fit inside the dinghy" jewel for example - with no
apparent knowledge of the subject.
Possibly gay or a sexual predator as his writing displays a nearly
psychopathic hatred of women.
Possible too poor to even own an operable boat as a recent expose'
alleges that he drives an ancient rust riddled vehicle and his "****
yellow boat" is apparently permanently moored derelict. Alleged to
rent a room to live in ashore.
Reportedly seen by the community in which he resides as, well, a bit
strange - the type of individual who when arrested for stealing
women's knickers off washing lines incurs the comment "Well, he always
did act a bit odd - used to watch dogs lick themselves, you know - and
giggle.

Cheers,

Bruce
(bruceinbangkokatgmaildotcom)