The species Krausii Liesallthetime Marylandus has been spotted
recently in Northern Maryland. The species’ parrot-like ability to
mimic human sounds has attracted the attention of both amateur birders
and scientists.

In the latest sighting, the bird was observed in the parking lot or a
busy restaurant near Deale, MD. According to restaurant patrons,
between savaging for scraps near the restaurant’s dumpster, the bird
would repeatedly scream “My wife is a doctor-doctor”.

The restaurant’s owner, Wizard von Woodstock, when interviewed by the
local daily, said he was “baffled” by the apparition. “It was really
strange,” he told reporters. “I called the Deale Animal Control
Office, but when they drove into the parking lot, the bird fled.”

Local authorities are asking the public to call if they spot the
creature again. “It’s really an ugly assed bird,” said Melvin
Mugwamp, local animal control officer. “And it’s screeching of those
repetitive phrases in a human-like voice makes no sense at all.”

The Canadian based organization, Society to Unite People in Dullness
(S.T.U.P.I.D.) has opposed research study of the species. A call to
S.T.U.P.I.D.’s president, Don Whitewash, for comment on this latest
sighting was not immediately returned.

Story developing. Updates as warranted.