Wanted to restate bits of Rogers Long's advice, to highlight my belief
he nailed this one right on the head.

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PART 1
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On Aug 1, 1:19 pm, "Roger Long" wrote:
This is a 26 foot boat. Your husband should be able to get it in and out of
the slip and do everything required to take it anywhere it has any business
going with no one else on board. I do it all the time on my 32 footer and
others do it with larger boats. Generally, when "captains" are yelling, it
is because they don't feel in control. I'm quite sure your husband doesn't
feel nearly as competent as you describe him. Even if he does, then the
boat has become a venue where he feels it is legitimate for him to berate
and belittle you and your daughters. The fact that he is taking such great
advantage of that illusion is something that smoother line handling is not
going to fix.

Your husband should go
out and sail alone, a lot, until he is so smooth and comfortable handling
the boat without help that he can integrate teaching you into the process.

Absolutely Roger !!! - The whole problem here is with him, and Sailing
alone is
just the right medicine. If he feels he cannot, get him the instructor
first, not you!!

Perhaps you can talk him into custom instruction for the skill of
"single handing"
the boat. If he thinks of this as a "new" skill he dosn't have,
perhaps the thought
that his experience somehow exempts him from the need for a teacher
won't occur.
Once he can confidently sail this boat alone, he can as roger wrote,
"integrate
you and your daughters into the process"

For me, it only took a single 4 hour on the water lesson from an
instructor to learn how
to singlehand a 23 foot Sonar that had all the necessary cleats in
place to sail the
boat that way.

There are some single handed sailing web sites that also give useful
advise on how
to sail alone too.


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PART 2
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A week long intensive course should make you and your daughters sufficiently
competent to cruise in this boat if you exercise good judgement and respect
the limitations of your experience. You would, at least, be more competent
than 85% of the other people out there in 26 foot sailboats.


I would add to this, once you take the class, without delay get you
and your daughters into a situation where you are
taking the boat out yourselves once a week, and even better, get into
an informal racing group. An informal racing group
, beer can racing we call it, are welcoming to new crew all the time,
most can laugh at mistakes rather then feel put
crew in the position of feeling they lost a critical race, and really
helps cement the class instruction to the inside of your scull.
You might also end up with different captain each week, or take turns
being the captain yourself.

The big benefit of racing, and the purpose it gives to good rather
then just ok sail handling, is that you will find yourself
anticipating what has to happen next before it does. Once your at that
level, you will find it more enjoyable to
be with your husband. Imagine if you know what he might ask you to do
next, and what around you might
prevent you from doing it correct that you should fix ahead of time,
becomes much easier to be a crew member.
My best crew members figure out what I forgot to ask them to do, and
either drop suggestions or just mention that they are doing
it. As a captain ... it's much more fun when your crew is covering
for your ommisions of commands. It feels less like your giving
commands and more like your all working together to get the boat
moving.


Best Wishes for succesful Family Sailing !