On May 11, 9:24 pm, JR North wrote:
Interesting story. Q: Was your wife on board in the deal from the start,
or did you initialize it with the seller, lay the groundwork, and then
tell her?
JR



wrote:
In another thread, someone was discussing his bad experience with a
potential boat buyer. I wonder if sometimes things happen to buyers
that thye just dont expect.
For example, my wife and I looked at a piece of property in Wyoming we
loved. We lived near there when first married and it is a true gem;
mountaintop, 4 acres, on a paved year round access road, 20 min from
town, flat, great view. She loved it and talked about buying it and
we discussed going there each year in the summer etc. We already go
to Wy every other summer. So, after nearly a year of back and forth
with the owner, we agreed on a price. I arranged financing via a home
equity loan, no problem with huge amount of equity. I arranged a
realtor to draw up a contract, I did my homework on value. I talked
it over with the owner and was ready to send the contract. Suddenly,
my wife balks at it. She is worried about all the "what ifs". She
wants to make sure there is no risk at all, etc. I cannot proceed
with this unless my wife signs the home equity loan so now I look
like a fool. I am sure the owner is cursing me and he has a right to
but I really thought my wife was ready to do this. The owner prob
will not be willing to deal with me again after this fiasco but from
my position as buyer, this was totally unexpected.

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Home Page:http://www.seanet.com/~jasonrnorth

I told her we'd settled on a price and had gotten a realtor to draw up
a contract. I thought she knew I was totally serious. In the past,
she had few qualms about taking risks,in fact I married her because
she was a risk taker. This sudden bout of the "what ifs" completely
puzzles me. But you know, its just like the saying, "Women marry
hoping to change their men, men marry hoping their women do not
change."
Now she says, "I dont want to do anything that might jeapordize our
home in any way" which baffles the hell outta me. Whats the use of
having equity if you arent going to use it as leverage. I think that
having my own business for years has made me very casual about large
sums of money and about risk in general. Her profession of being a
public school teacher has emphasized low risk behaviour and covering
her ass at all costs (I am not sure we want this type of people
teaching our kids).
I feel like I got blindsided on this and am too embarassed to call the
seller back right now. Even though it was my wifes issues, I should
take blame for not reading her correctly. Sometimes the buyer has
problems they did not consider.