"Bob Crantz" wrote in message
...
Thursday, January 27, 2005
Democrats To Sue Phil Hendrie Over Kerry Loss

Say his imaginary guests created "the illusion of a plurality" in Ohio

--Los Angeles Syndicated radio talk show host Phil Hendrie is under a
legal assault from the Democratic National Committee, claiming that
the imaginary supporters he interviewed nearly every night during the
election cycle "created the impression amongst fellow democrats that
there were more supporters of Kerry than actually existed."

Hendrie's show is best described as "radio ventriloquism." His guests,
while merely figments of his own imagination, are brought to life with
a lightning-fast ability to toggle between a phone receiver and the
studio microphone. Those familiar with the show listen vicariously, as
unwitting callers phone in to argue against a "guest" whose views are
generally polarizing and judgmental. Hendrie will generally take the
moral high ground against his own repulsive creation.

The DNC contends that these unwitting caller types are the bedrock of
their constituency. Chairperson Nancy Pelosi finds this opportunistic
handling of the gullible particularly disturbing. Hendrie, a democrat,
supported George W. Bush's reelection because he believed his own
party "didn't get" 9/11's larger ramifications. His show premises were
structured accordingly, with biting satirical representations of
people alleged to either be Kerry supporters, or even campaign
staffers.

"I was listening one evening, and there was one of Phil's 'voices,'"
she said. "and there was this guy named Jeff Dowder claiming that
Bush's economic policies had cost him his job, and thus forced him to
assume a lifeguard position, all the while lying about his knowledge
of CPR."

As the show progressed, the guest revealed that an eight-year-old boy
had drowned on his watch, and that his "job description ended at the
water's edge."

"People really believed it," she said, "and it made Kerry supporters
sound like a bunch of kooks, hung up on union ideals."

On another occasion, Doug Danger, who identifies himself repeatedly as
"a gay man and a gay journalist," was claiming that he "has a certain
gay intensity that would turn any Bush supporter," and that his job
was to intimidate people into voting for Kerry with his "gay eye."

"This is why we have to sue," said Pelosi. "Because Bush's Ohio
victory was clinched in the fog of Hendrie's existentialist
obstructioneering."
Other characters included high school football coach Vernon Dozier,
who was giving Kerry his vote "because Bin Laden told him to," and, to
add insult to injury, southern California homeowner, Bobbie Dooley,
who, in the wake of the election results, said, "Blacks should do the
rioting because that's what they do."

"We cannot publicly support such a position," said Pelosi. "This man
cost John Kerry the presidency, and while we have no illusions of
overturning these dubious election results, we can at least make Mr.
Hendrie's professional life uncomfortable."

Pelosi says that, while the DNC will be the official plaintiff in the
suit, that original complaint has come from ordinary citizens. "Had it
not been for the circumspect talents of people like veteran Lloyd
Bonafide, restaurateur Ted Bell, bus driver Mavis Leonard and military
cadet RC Collins, we'd have never fully understood the level's of Mr.
Hendrie's deception."

Future campaign finance legislation will bear the names of these
whistle-blowers.

I've spoken with each at length on the phone, and I can tell you,
these people are the real thing." Pelosi said.


That Pelosi is one stupid bitch....

That's a riot. It sounds like something right out of "The Onion" or
Scrabble Face.
I wonder of the Republican Party is going to sue because of Larry Grover
and "Conservatives of Kern County" making Republicans look bad.
Bwahahahahahahahahahah.

Wilbur Hubbard