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Tim Tim is offline
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First recorded activity by BoatBanter: Nov 2006
Posts: 19,107
Default Nautical Joke of The Day.


JLH wrote:
On Sat, 24 Feb 2007 14:22:48 GMT, Short Wave Sportfishing
wrote:

Got my first issue of 'Center Console Angler' recently. Nice magazine.
Seems to have more down to earth info in it than many of the other boating
magazines I've seen. Has a good discussion of through-hull transducers.

Oh, and I enjoyed the jokes. Here's one to brighten your Saturday morning.

A Marine Gunnery Sergeant and a general were sitting in the
barbershop. They were both just getting finished with their shaves, when
the barbers reached for some after-shave to slap on their faces. The
general shouted, "Hey, don't put that stuff on me! My wife will think I've
been in a whorehouse!" The Gunny turned to his barber and said, "Go ahead
and put it on me. My wife doesn't know what the inside of a whorehouse
smells like."




An Ensign was sitting his first qualification board for Officer of the
Deck at sea. After several hours of watching the young officer answer
difficult questions from the members of the board, the ship's Captain
decided to finish off the board by placing the Ensign in a completely
hypothetical emergency situation. "What would you do if a sudden
storm sprang up on the starboard side?" he asked.

"Throw out an anchor, Sir," the Ensign replied.

"And what would you do if another storm sprang up aft?"

"I'd throw out another anchor, Captain."

"And if another terrific storm sprang up forward, what would you do
then?" asked the Captain.

"Throw out another anchor, Sir," the Ensign said.

"Hold on," said the Captain. "Where are you getting all those anchors
from?"

The Ensign smiled. "From the same place you're getting all those
storms, Sir."