Thread: Dogs on board
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Larry Larry is offline
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First recorded activity by BoatBanter: Jul 2006
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Default Dogs on board

Molesworth wrote in news:ukmole-
:

We have a Lab/Basset cross and am wondering how she'll get on on board.



As you already HAVE a dog, and it's too late, just try it. Some love
boats and you have to drag them ashore. Some hate boats and will drag
YOU ashore at the earliest convenience.

As you have a female, you'll only have to stop at every 5th power post in
the pouring rain while she "senses" the post for a mate. Male dog owners
are not so lucky having to wait until the post is properly "watered" on
their way to the dog walk area.

Every time there's a nasty day...rain, snow, wind, etc....don your foul
weather gear and haul a bucket on a lanyard up the dock to the dog walk
area. Stop at every 5th power post and dock box to let the bucket sniff.
Sit the bucket next to the doggie cleaning scoop stand and stand there in
the pouring rain for 10 minutes waiting for the bucket to take a crap in
just the right spot. At the end of the 10 minutes, take a dump bag and
clean up one of the piles already left there from some other dog owner.
Put it in the dumpster before dragging your bucket back down the dock to
the boat, stopping at every 5th power post and dock box in your path for
more sniffing.

Do it, again, in 4-6 hours, whenever the bucket looks like it's gotta
"go". Resist the idea, that has inevitably crossed your mind, about
kicking the whining bucket in the drink and watching it sink when noone
is watching, like during those "special trips" at 3AM.

That should break you of this insane idea in a day or two.

Don't forget to sleep with the bucket, either. You know damned well SHE
doesn't sleep on the floor at home. She'll be scared to death when the
deck creaks under her feet every time a wave tilts it under her.

Stow the bucket and sleep until 10AM on day 3 to simulate how wonderful
it is to sleep it off on a quiet boat without the damned bucket whining
and wagging to "go" at O-dark-30 in the pouring rain.

See? Which is better??

One less pain in the ass to worry about falling overboard in a squall,
too!