Larry wrote:
Gary wrote in news44bf.417596$tl2.177416@pd7tw3no:


Narrow Channels--International



All this is great....if you're a ship from Le Havre. But, the jetski guy
has his South Carolina Dept of Natural Resources, Boater's Handbook. (The
guy on the sailboat probably doesn't have anything...and I'm serious.)
Whatever bureaucrats are in charge locally are the ones that set the rules
and bust them in the harbor and ICW. No boater safety course actually
teaches these International Rules.

So, the rules he goes by (assuming he goes by rules and is a nice guy with
family out for a PWC cruise, not some freak, which most of them really are
not) is the Boater's Handbook DNR handed him when he took his 2 sons to the
PWC training course DNR ran at the high school so the boys could get their
little DNR drivers permits. It says 50' from boats and docks and 200' from
marinas.

This nonsense of 8 layers of rule-making bureaucrats, all different in
every fiefdom you boat across, is REALLY STUPID!!



Naw, it's the only way to sentance young Johnny to a day or two of
trial and similar imprisonment or even fines for driving a jski like
a, well, you know.

Even just paying legal fees to not show up...

'snot worth a charter challenge, y'know?

To some the only real punishment possible is being kept waiting
beside the road for 20 minutes to sign for a ticket. Daddy's guy
pops a chzek, and I'm Bob's boy again!

But it gives an honest cop motivation to try to 'help' a few who
might just kill themselves if they don't get a good talking to,
possibly even to shoot a few suspects evading arrest.

Rule 1 in the book is really "Do everything you can to avoid a
collision, unless you are protecting the flag carrier."

New robotic insects will telemeter odours as well as high quality
vidio and audio to headquarters and nearby patrol vessels. Not all
them skeeters is real.

It's getting to be such a madhouse out here on the water that they
are going to install bouyed lanes, like streets, in some areas, with
speed limits and photoradar lights here and there, and helicopter
camera and gun ship patrols, who will soon be overburdened and
overbudgeted by medical rescues and evacuations. The photoradar
fines will show up in your income tax, property tax, auto permit
fees, and insurance premiums. They will even garnishee your X's
support payments, but not your child support. Sailboats are, of
course, to be avoided at all costs, have complete right of way, and
are not so regulated.

N'yah, N'yahh, N'ya N'ya N'Yahhhh!

International boundary crossings must be authorised by automatic
cell picturephone optional service documentation, six week setup
required, pay per use, paypal required, or those crossing the line
will be boarded. If your cell account application and passport
quality photograph isn't notarized, witnessed, vetted, approved,
enabled, vetted again and authorized, promulgated and verified
biometrically, you will be boarded.

Except for sailboats, who may zig zag wherever the hell they think
the wind, rocks and compass pertubations want them to, so there.
They have an express line to customs and a toll free number, too.
They have their own rules about survival in the wind, and how to
avoid each other. Some required turns could need to be initiated a
mile in advance of heavy vessels, for a sailor to avoid being
inadverdently mashed by an encumbered vessel in who's wind shadow
they could become becalmed, and it's you who must avoid their
attempts to non the less make time to weather, wherever their
anchorage may be. God rest them all, safe at hawser's end, and thee,
brother. Even if you have to go 100 extra yards to do it, even if
you have to back up in your lane to make a hole in traffic, you got
to do it. It's the law, Billy. God help you if you scratch their
gelcoat, even shake their stirred martinii with wake. Damages is
damages, and gin is expensive, too expensive to be ruined by you.

(insert razzzzzberry, here)

Sailors shouldn't need to look out for whirly gigs or steamboats, we
can't get away, and can't catch you. Most of you are too hard to
see, are our sails? All you need is to tongue your fly by wire
joystick and Mr. Scott will beam you past us, right? Behind us, that
is, it being safer, all 'round. Well clear. If the cook's flag is
flying, you must not over agitate the poaching eggs with a heavy
wake, right?

If you know sailing, it is easy to differentiate a true sailboat
from a stickboat, or motor sailer, who will endeavour to behave as a
powerboat, but who is still capable of being spun about by the wake
of a helicopter, or even broached, then reversed if they suddenly
and unexpected must turn ever so slightly to avoid you avoiding that
dead head he saw 20 minutes ago and still can't seem to get around,
what with the current, and wind shiftiness, and all.

Sailors called Kite skiers usually have the highest priority, being
essentially pedestrians, or potential aspiring pedestrians, most of
the time.

To whom would you bitch if you ran over some stupid swimmer's head
and the steel plate in his old veteran's head should scratch your
epoxy coated prop?

All considered, the best weapon on a boat is a yard sprayer full of
gasoline.

What about them Pelicans, eh?

Terry K