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jps
 
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Default I've run out of lies - help!

In article ,
says...
It's supposed to be 65-70 degrees today (Friday). This could be the last
decent fishing day until next April, unless you think fishing in goose down
clothing is pleasant. I need a good lie for the home office, so I can take
the day off. I've used up all the really good ones. I need some ideas before
7:30 AM Eastern time. The author of the winning idea gets three of these
things: ~

Thank you.


You're awarding tildes?

Grand Jury duty
Customer carrot inventory
Rectal fissure removal (AKA Fritz,Herring,Hertvig or, simply Dave)
Penile girth reduction or prepping for your conversion to Judaism (oy!)
Urinal tract reaming (big sympathy on this one)
Breast reduction or enlargement
Bailing my son out of jail
Busting up a local meth ring
Annual day spa trip
You've been indicted
Your baptism or Rebirth
Chance to meet Pat Robertson, Robert Schuler or Franklin Graham
Jogging with Al Sharpton
Trying out for Martha Stewart's Apprentice Show or Jeopardy
Attending the fire department's fundraiser featuring Bobo

Feel free to use unaltered or edited to your satisfaction.

jps