You guys have it all wrong....

WHY BOATS ARE BETTER THAN WOMEN

Boats never choose to get their hair done instead of spending time
with you.

Boats never have a curfew.

Boats never break a date.

Boats never have a headache.

Boats are always in the mood.

Boats are appropriately greeted with a whistle.

Boats never care if you arrive with buddies and choose to spend
the evening playing cards.

Boats will always perform for you to the best of their abilities.
You just need to treat them with care and not interfere with what they
were designed to do.

Boats, like women, are best maneuvered with a light touch.
However, only a boat's response is predictable.

Boats will tolerate some neglect quite well. However, like some
women, boats will try to dump you if you are too heavy handed with
them or neglect their basic needs for too long.

Both boats and women like to show their superstructures to best
advantage. Boats, however, never complain that they have nothing
to wear.

Boats, like women, can demand that you spend substantial amounts
of money on their upkeep and maintenance. With boats, you are
always guaranteed a good ride afterwards.

Boats never need another pair of shoes.

Boats don't care if you choose to spend the night with another
woman.

Boats don't give you the cold shoulder after you have not called
or visited for a while.

Boats always leave it to you to decide if you want to go out in
foul weather.

Boats never complain that you don't talk to them.

You never have to bring a boat gifts of flowers, chocolates or
jewelry.

You don't need to romance your boat before she'll let you spend
the night.

Boats never get pregnant.

Boats never get PMS.

You cannot catch a sexually transmitted disease from spending time
with many different boats.

With a boat you never need to carry protection.

A boat never gets jealous.

You can always tell a boat about other boats that you have
sailed.

A boat never compares you to others who have sailed her.

A boat never fakes it.

A boat looks just as appealing the morning after.

Nobody is offended if you ask to borrow their boat for a romantic
evening or weekend.

One boat can simultaneously satisfy the needs of quite a few men
and women.

A fully rigged boat can call for several pairs of hands to keep
her satisfied and in proper trim, and nobody thinks poorly of her.

When you buy an electric device to help single-hand a boat, nobody
thinks less of you, and the boat is not embarrassed when you
demonstrate the actual use of the appliance.

Boats never flirt and never play hard to get.

Boats respond best if you first wash their painted bottoms.

Boats never ask if their stern is too wide or if their rigging is
sagging.

Boats never pout if you choose not to spend the night.

Boats don't make a scene if you choose to go with a younger model.

Well maintained, gracefully aging boats always have hordes of
younger and older men lusting after them.

Boats always gratify you with their performance when you custom
fit them with the newest fabrics.

Boats can always be rented to others by the day or by the hour.

In wide-open spaces, quality rope or lengths of chain are used to
anchor a boat. Imagine trying this with a woman.

Before a boat changes hands, the current owner encourages all
serious potential prospects to take her for a spin and try her out.

Boats respond well if you tie them up for the night.

Thru-hulls are critical to below deck operations. Only with a
boat are you encouraged to inspect each thru-hull BEFORE you take
her out.