I'm going to assume your posting here is a de facto request for input, so:

First, I think it's critical that you direct your anger where it will do the
least harm, and at the root cause of your delay: the "justice" system. Your
son, as deserving as he might be of a scolding/punishment for getting
caught, shouldn't be subjected to your anger at the failure of your dreams.
Besides being magnified by issues he has no control over, your anger may
destroy what you have left of a relationship, as well as his interest in
playing the game by acceptable rules.

Second, weigh the consequences of going anyway, taking him with you. Most
court systems have such a high probation failure rate that the penalties,
when you return contrite, will be acceptalbe, and directed at you for
breaking the probation, not him. A well thought out defense on the grounds
that he was in greater danger among his local associates and environment,
and that strengthening your bond with him would be a far more effective
rehibilitation program than confining him to his present world, will likely
minimize, or even cancel, any court requirement for revenge. They likely
aren't interested in listening to any "I'm going to do this or that"
stories, but will be forced to aknowledge a "We've accomplished this"
scenario after the fact.

I'm sorry to hear about your daughter's trials.

Padeen (who has no law training, so therefore can't be held liable if your
life goes to **** for following my advise!)