CAPTAIN OF THIS NEWSGROUP DIRE
THESE LIBERAL LUBBERS RAISE MY IRE,
YET FROM DUTY I'LL NOT TIRE
TO DRAG THEM SCREAMING FROM THEIR MIRE.
I, THE BEST THIS GROUP TO GUIDE,
AM U.S. COAST GUARD CERTIFIED.
I'LL NOT SPARE THE THIN OF HIDE;
MINCING WORDS I CAN'T ABIDE,
SENSIBILITIES I PUSH ASIDE,
SO THEY CALL ME, FAR AND WIDE,
ENLIGHT'NING CAPTAIN NEAL!

Thanks to Tim Fatchen.
http://www.garageband.com/artist/FlyingTadpole/songs

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