You forgot the mention that you may, or may not have been in
Cambodia, and it may, or may not have been Christmastime.
Don't you remember testifying before Congress that you were
definately in Cambodia? And later not being so sure?

"Joe" wrote

And I should of gotten at least a Bronze Star the time I saved the
ship from a raging inferno. Some rags in the paint locker caught fire
due to spontanious combustion. Being the super hero I was with no
regard to my own safety I poured almost half a cold Coca Cola on the
raging inferno and saved the lives of over 1,300 of my shipmates..