When a young woman asked Old Salty if he was a Real Sailor he replied
"Certainly! I was born on a boat and have sailed the seven seas for 60
years, endured storms and weeks long becalmings, etc., etc." "That
doesn't matter," says she, "This is the New Millennium! It's what you
*feel* that counts. For example, I'm a lesbian because I think about
having sex with women 24/7! Never men just women! And whenever I see a
woman I think about how she'd look naked and how it'd be to enjoy sex
with her. Do you feel like that about boats?" "Well ... no" "Then you
ain't no REAL Sailor" and she flounces off.

A bit later a kid asks Salty if he's a sailor. Well, he says, I thot so
but I just found out I'm a lesbian.

Cheers
Howard