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Andy's Predictions for 2008
From Andy Borowitz: Next Year’s News Predictions for 2008 from BorowitzReport.com January: After paying five billion dollars for The Wall Street Journal, Rupert Murdoch will reduce the size of the paper by removing the facts. February: Responding to the controversy over the CIAs’ waterboarding videotapes, President Bush will reaffirm his administration’s opposition to videotaping. March: As the writers strike drags on, Paramount will produce the second “Transformers” film without a script, just like they did with the first one. April: Monica Lewinsky will announce her candidacy for President of the United States. She will offer herself as an alternative to Hillary, saying, “It worked before.” May: Attempting to bolster flagging enlistment rates, the Army will change its recruitment slogan from “Army Strong” to “I Can’t Believe It’s Not a Civil War.” June: Population experts will warn that the world’s population will soar in 2008, largely due to the Spears sisters. July: China will send a new brand of rat poison to the United States under the name “Delicious Cupcakes.” August: Sen. Edward Kennedy will abandon plans to write his memoirs, explaining, “I can’t even remember what I did last night.” September: At the Republican National Convention, G.O.P. nominee Mike Huckabee will select Jesus Christ as his running mate. October: O.J. Simpson will be convicted in Las Vegas, proving that it is easier to get away with murder than stealing sports memorabilia. November: President-elect Michael Bloomberg will defend the five-billion-dollar cost of his campaign, arguing, “Rupert Murdoch paid that much for The Wall Street Journal, and I get a whole country.” December: In his last official act, President Bush will announce an exit strategy from Iraq. The President will withdraw all U.S. troops – through Iran. -- George W. Bush - the 43rd Best President Ever! |
Andy's Predictions for 2008
On Mon, 31 Dec 2007 10:48:36 -0500, HK wrote:
From Andy Borowitz: Next Year’s News Predictions for 2008 from BorowitzReport.com January: After paying five billion dollars for The Wall Street Journal, Rupert Murdoch will reduce the size of the paper by removing the facts. ....which will only reduce the size by about one paragraph. February: Responding to the controversy over the CIAs’ waterboarding videotapes, President Bush will reaffirm his administration’s opposition to videotaping. ....but *will* publish biographical details of all CIA agents in rec.boats or elsewhere March: As the writers strike drags on, Paramount will produce the second “Transformers” film without a script, just like they did with the first one. ....luckily no writers were used for "Inconvenient Truth" because they had too much integrity. April: Monica Lewinsky will announce her candidacy for President of the United States. She will offer herself as an alternative to Hillary, saying, “It worked before.” .....and she won't have to perjure herself! May: Attempting to bolster flagging enlistment rates, the Army will change its recruitment slogan from “Army Strong” to “I Can’t Believe It’s Not a Civil War.” .....hey, "Army Strong" looks great on my license plate holders! June: Population experts will warn that the world’s population will soar in 2008, largely due to the Spears sisters. ....and the Pampers folks will be upset as 'bottomless' will be the 'in' thing. July: China will send a new brand of rat poison to the United States under the name “Delicious Cupcakes.” ....and, of course, the Democrats will blame this on Wal-Mart unless it becomes unionized first. August: Sen. Edward Kennedy will abandon plans to write his memoirs, explaining, “I can’t even remember what I did last night.” ....'nuff said. September: At the Republican National Convention, G.O.P. nominee Mike Huckabee will select Jesus Christ as his running mate. ....there, got the religious threat in there. Now the SP's know who *not* to vote for. October: O.J. Simpson will be convicted in Las Vegas, proving that it is easier to get away with murder than stealing sports memorabilia. Good. November: President-elect Michael Bloomberg will defend the five-billion-dollar cost of his campaign, arguing, “Rupert Murdoch paid that much for The Wall Street Journal, and I get a whole country.” December: In his last official act, President Bush will announce an exit strategy from Iraq. The President will withdraw all U.S. troops – through Iran. .....that won't happen. Iran is too nice. They have no plans for nuclear weapons. They just want electricity. If we would just sit down and give them whatever they ask, they would always be nice. -- John H "All decisions are the result of binary thinking." |
Andy's Predictions for 2008
On Dec 31, 9:48 am, HK wrote:
From Andy Borowitz: Next Year's News Predictions for 2008 from BorowitzReport.com January: After paying five billion dollars for The Wall Street Journal, Rupert Murdoch will reduce the size of the paper by removing the facts. February: Responding to the controversy over the CIAs' waterboarding videotapes, President Bush will reaffirm his administration's opposition to videotaping. March: As the writers strike drags on, Paramount will produce the second "Transformers" film without a script, just like they did with the first one. April: Monica Lewinsky will announce her candidacy for President of the United States. She will offer herself as an alternative to Hillary, saying, "It worked before." May: Attempting to bolster flagging enlistment rates, the Army will change its recruitment slogan from "Army Strong" to "I Can't Believe It's Not a Civil War." June: Population experts will warn that the world's population will soar in 2008, largely due to the Spears sisters. July: China will send a new brand of rat poison to the United States under the name "Delicious Cupcakes." August: Sen. Edward Kennedy will abandon plans to write his memoirs, explaining, "I can't even remember what I did last night." September: At the Republican National Convention, G.O.P. nominee Mike Huckabee will select Jesus Christ as his running mate. October: O.J. Simpson will be convicted in Las Vegas, proving that it is easier to get away with murder than stealing sports memorabilia. November: President-elect Michael Bloomberg will defend the five-billion-dollar cost of his campaign, arguing, "Rupert Murdoch paid that much for The Wall Street Journal, and I get a whole country." December: In his last official act, President Bush will announce an exit strategy from Iraq. The President will withdraw all U.S. troops - through Iran. -- George W. Bush - the 43rd Best President Ever! Cameron MacDonald's Prediction for 2008: Harry Krause will continue his lying unabated. (Neither a crystal ball nor Tarot cards required for this one!) |
Andy's Predictions for 2008
"HK" wrote in message . .. From Andy Borowitz: Next Year’s News Predictions for 2008 from BorowitzReport.com April: Monica Lewinsky will announce her candidacy for President of the United States. She will offer herself as an alternative to Hillary, saying, “It worked before.” She spent more time in the Oval Office and with the POTUS than Hillary did. |
Andy's Predictions for 2008
Calif Bill wrote:
"HK" wrote in message . .. From Andy Borowitz: Next Year’s News Predictions for 2008 from BorowitzReport.com April: Monica Lewinsky will announce her candidacy for President of the United States. She will offer herself as an alternative to Hillary, saying, “It worked before.” She spent more time in the Oval Office and with the POTUS than Hillary did. Y-A-W-N. Maybe her "advice and consent" helped keep President Bill from doing really stupid stuff, like invading Iraq. Whatever Clinton's sexual indiscretions, the harm they caused pale in comparison to the horrors perpetrated by BushCo. |
Andy's Predictions for 2008
"HK" wrote in message ... Calif Bill wrote: "HK" wrote in message . .. From Andy Borowitz: Next Year’s News Predictions for 2008 from BorowitzReport.com April: Monica Lewinsky will announce her candidacy for President of the United States. She will offer herself as an alternative to Hillary, saying, “It worked before.” She spent more time in the Oval Office and with the POTUS than Hillary did. Y-A-W-N. Maybe her "advice and consent" helped keep President Bill from doing really stupid stuff, like invading Iraq. Whatever Clinton's sexual indiscretions, the harm they caused pale in comparison to the horrors perpetrated by BushCo. YAWWWWWWWN. Invading Bosnia, blowing up aspirin factories. etc. BIIIIIIIIG YAWWWWWWWWWN. |
Andy's Predictions for 2008
wrote in message ... On Mon, 31 Dec 2007 10:48:36 -0500, HK wrote: April: Monica Lewinsky will announce her candidacy for President of the United States. She will offer herself as an alternative to Hillary, saying, "It worked before." If Hillary is still winning the nomination by then I am sure Monica will be in the news, along with Vince Foster, Whitewater and the Rose Law Firm. "Sherman, set the wayback machine to 1994" The real question is if Hillary would name Bill as her running mate. Things that make you go "Hmmm" Which brings you back to Monica ;-) Bill's not eligible. Have to be eligible to be POTUS. |
Andy's Predictions for 2008
On Mon, 31 Dec 2007 23:10:00 -0800, "CalifBill"
wrote: wrote in message .. . On Mon, 31 Dec 2007 10:48:36 -0500, HK wrote: April: Monica Lewinsky will announce her candidacy for President of the United States. She will offer herself as an alternative to Hillary, saying, "It worked before." If Hillary is still winning the nomination by then I am sure Monica will be in the news, along with Vince Foster, Whitewater and the Rose Law Firm. "Sherman, set the wayback machine to 1994" The real question is if Hillary would name Bill as her running mate. Things that make you go "Hmmm" Which brings you back to Monica ;-) Bill's not eligible. Have to be eligible to be POTUS. I read a discussion about a year or so ago about this very thing. The only qualification for Vice President is that the individual must be at least 35 years of age, a natural born citizen of the United States, and a resident of the U.S. for 14 years. The Rules of Succession do not delineate prior service as a disqualification for the office of Vice President as they do for the office of President. Which means that succession to the Presidency isn't in the rules - only being elected to the Presidency is in the rules. According to most constitutional lawyers surveyed in this article, including schools from Harvard's School of Government (or whatever it's called now) to Podunk University scholars, it's perfectly legal to elect a former President to the office of Vice President. Now if you read into that a little, you will find that potentially, the office of Vice President, which does not have term limits, to be a power base from which a smart politician can operate. And if you don't think the Clinton's have thought about it a lot, your nuts. :) |
Andy's Predictions for 2008
HK wrote:
Calif Bill wrote: "HK" wrote in message . .. From Andy Borowitz: Next Year’s News Predictions for 2008 from BorowitzReport.com April: Monica Lewinsky will announce her candidacy for President of the United States. She will offer herself as an alternative to Hillary, saying, “It worked before.” She spent more time in the Oval Office and with the POTUS than Hillary did. Y-A-W-N. Maybe her "advice and consent" helped keep President Bill from doing really stupid stuff, like invading Iraq. Whatever Clinton's sexual indiscretions, the harm they caused pale in comparison to the horrors perpetrated by BushCo. It didn't stop Clinton from bombing and empty terrorist camp or an Aspirin factory. |
Andy's Predictions for 2008
"Short Wave Sportfishing" wrote in message ... Bill's not eligible. Have to be eligible to be POTUS. I read a discussion about a year or so ago about this very thing. The only qualification for Vice President is that the individual must be at least 35 years of age, a natural born citizen of the United States, and a resident of the U.S. for 14 years. The Rules of Succession do not delineate prior service as a disqualification for the office of Vice President as they do for the office of President. Which means that succession to the Presidency isn't in the rules - only being elected to the Presidency is in the rules. According to most constitutional lawyers surveyed in this article, including schools from Harvard's School of Government (or whatever it's called now) to Podunk University scholars, it's perfectly legal to elect a former President to the office of Vice President. Now if you read into that a little, you will find that potentially, the office of Vice President, which does not have term limits, to be a power base from which a smart politician can operate. And if you don't think the Clinton's have thought about it a lot, your nuts. :) OK. But lets say the president dies. Then the vice president becomes president no? Should this be Bill, how does that work with presidential term limits? Bill just does not want to stay away from those interns does he? |
Andy's Predictions for 2008
Canuck57 wrote:
Should this be Bill, how does that work with presidential term limits? Bill just does not want to stay away from those interns does he? Why are you so hung up on Bill Clinton's sex life? Do you think his extramarital sex life is more important than the indisputable fact that the current occupant of the White House is in the running for worst president in the history of the United States, and possibly the most incompetent, too? Perhaps if *you* had a sex life, you wouldn't be so concerned about Clinton's. -- George W. Bush - the 43rd Best President Ever! |
Andy's Predictions for 2008
On Tue, 01 Jan 2008 14:32:40 GMT, "Canuck57"
wrote: "Short Wave Sportfishing" wrote in message .. . Bill's not eligible. Have to be eligible to be POTUS. I read a discussion about a year or so ago about this very thing. The only qualification for Vice President is that the individual must be at least 35 years of age, a natural born citizen of the United States, and a resident of the U.S. for 14 years. The Rules of Succession do not delineate prior service as a disqualification for the office of Vice President as they do for the office of President. Which means that succession to the Presidency isn't in the rules - only being elected to the Presidency is in the rules. According to most constitutional lawyers surveyed in this article, including schools from Harvard's School of Government (or whatever it's called now) to Podunk University scholars, it's perfectly legal to elect a former President to the office of Vice President. Now if you read into that a little, you will find that potentially, the office of Vice President, which does not have term limits, to be a power base from which a smart politician can operate. And if you don't think the Clinton's have thought about it a lot, your nuts. :) OK. But lets say the president dies. Then the vice president becomes president no? Should this be Bill, how does that work with presidential term limits? Bill just does not want to stay away from those interns does he? From what I read, and it was by no means a complete dissertation, some heavy legal beagle constitutional types were consulted and according to them, there is nothing from preventing a former President, as Vice President, to succeed to the Presidency effectively giving any former President three terms (if it were to work out that way). All the 22nd Amendment to the Constitution says is ""No person shall be elected to the office of the President more than twice, and no person who has held the office of President, or acted as President, for more than two years of a term to which some other person was elected President shall be elected to the office of the President more than once." It's elected - not succession - that was the key point in the discussion. |
Andy's Predictions for 2008
On Jan 1, 9:35*am, HK wrote:
Canuck57 wrote: Should this be Bill, how does that work with presidential term limits? *Bill just does not want to stay away from those interns does he? Why are you so hung up on Bill Clinton's sex life? Do you think his extramarital sex life is more important than the indisputable fact that the current occupant of the White House is in the running for worst president in the history of the United States, and possibly the most incompetent, too? Perhaps if *you* had a sex life, you wouldn't be so concerned about Clinton's. -- George W. Bush - the 43rd Best President Ever! Ya know Harry, no one really listens anymore cause we all know you just make it up as you go along. You need to stop "lobsta boating" Bush. Now if you really want to talk lets talk about all the missle and nuke technology the Clintons made available to the Chineese Military in exchange for a 3 million dollar donation right before the election. Which they "noticed" and returned soon after the election. Unfortunately, China did not give the information back, they used it to create better missles to take out our sattelites and of course passed it along to nice countries like Korea and Pakastan. The Clintons are about nothing but dirty money, probably the most sold out whitehouse in history. Billary, the most sold out White House in history... |
Andy's Predictions for 2008
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Andy's Predictions for 2008
HK wrote:
Perhaps if *you* had a sex life, you wouldn't be so concerned about Clinton's. krause, there are people who have morals. Sadly, you do not. The above statement demonstrates that. -- Charlie |
Andy's Predictions for 2008
On Tue, 01 Jan 2008 11:09:17 -0500, Charlie
wrote: HK wrote: Perhaps if *you* had a sex life, you wouldn't be so concerned about Clinton's. krause, there are people who have morals. Sadly, you do not. The above statement demonstrates that. "Intelligence, wit, judgment, and the other talents of the mind, however they may be named, or courage, resolution, perseverance, as qualities of temperament, are undoubtedly good and desirable in many respects; but these gifts of nature may also become extremely bad and mischievous if the will which is to make use of them, and which, therefore, constitutes what is called character, is not good." Immanuel Kant As defined above I don't see Harry as a moral charlatan - if anything the exact opposite. Then again, I'm a moron - what do I know. :) |
Andy's Predictions for 2008
On Jan 1, 8:15 am, BAR wrote:
HK wrote: Calif Bill wrote: "HK" wrote in message m... From Andy Borowitz: Next Year's News Predictions for 2008 from BorowitzReport.com April: Monica Lewinsky will announce her candidacy for President of the United States. She will offer herself as an alternative to Hillary, saying, "It worked before." She spent more time in the Oval Office and with the POTUS than Hillary did. Y-A-W-N. Maybe her "advice and consent" helped keep President Bill from doing really stupid stuff, like invading Iraq. Whatever Clinton's sexual indiscretions, the harm they caused pale in comparison to the horrors perpetrated by BushCo. It didn't stop Clinton from bombing and empty terrorist camp or an Aspirin factory.- Hide quoted text - - Show quoted text - So, in your head, the President is the one to blame for all military blunders???? |
Andy's Predictions for 2008
On Tue, 01 Jan 2008 16:14:58 GMT, Short Wave Sportfishing
wrote: On Tue, 01 Jan 2008 11:09:17 -0500, Charlie wrote: HK wrote: Perhaps if *you* had a sex life, you wouldn't be so concerned about Clinton's. krause, there are people who have morals. Sadly, you do not. The above statement demonstrates that. "Intelligence, wit, judgment, and the other talents of the mind, however they may be named, or courage, resolution, perseverance, as qualities of temperament, are undoubtedly good and desirable in many respects; but these gifts of nature may also become extremely bad and mischievous if the will which is to make use of them, and which, therefore, constitutes what is called character, is not good." Immanuel Kant As defined above I don't see Harry as a moral charlatan - if anything the exact opposite. Then again, I'm a moron - what do I know. :) "...these gifts...may ...become..bad...if the will...is not good." Show me the 'good will'. I've seen plenty of the bad. -- John H |
Andy's Predictions for 2008
HK wrote:
Canuck57 wrote: Should this be Bill, how does that work with presidential term limits? Bill just does not want to stay away from those interns does he? Why are you so hung up on Bill Clinton's sex life? Do you think his extramarital sex life is more important than the indisputable fact that the current occupant of the White House is in the running for worst president in the history of the United States, and possibly the most incompetent, too? Why do you defend a sex offender, proved liar and disbarred lawyer? Perhaps if *you* had a sex life, you wouldn't be so concerned about Clinton's. Why do you care a lick about Clinton's sex life? |
Andy's Predictions for 2008
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Andy's Predictions for 2008
On Wed, 2 Jan 2008 18:26:28 -0500, "John" wrote:
wrote in message ... On Jan 1, 9:35 am, HK wrote: Canuck57 wrote: Should this be Bill, how does that work with presidential term limits? Bill just does not want to stay away from those interns does he? Why are you so hung up on Bill Clinton's sex life? Do you think his extramarital sex life is more important than the indisputable fact that the current occupant of the White House is in the running for worst president in the history of the United States, and possibly the most incompetent, too? Perhaps if *you* had a sex life, you wouldn't be so concerned about Clinton's. -- George W. Bush - the 43rd Best President Ever! Ya know Harry, no one really listens anymore cause we all know you just make it up as you go along. You need to stop "lobsta boating" Bush. Now if you really want to talk lets talk about all the missle and nuke technology the Clintons made available to the Chineese Military in exchange for a 3 million dollar donation right before the election. Which of course never happened! Missile technology was found missing during Clintons term - but it disappeared during GH Bush presidency! When it was discovered missing of course Clinton returned campaign contributions. Of course FOX and Rush Limbaugh tell it different - so we know where you get your "news"..... Which they "noticed" and returned soon after the election. Unfortunately, China did not give the information back, they used it to create better missles to take out our sattelites and of course passed it along to nice countries like Korea and Pakastan. The Clintons are about nothing but dirty money, probably the most sold out whitehouse in history. Billary, the most sold out White House in history... First off I hate the Clintons But you do not have a clue here. Neil Bush one of the few people convicted in the S&L scandal - now has a no-bid government contract to supply material for no-child-left-behind. Why would any convicted embezzler even be eligible to get a no-bid-contract?? FAMILY corruption! How many shares of Exxon do you suppose the Bush family holds? And what has it done over the last eight years? Every government post that Bush gave out - he handed directly to to a ceo FROM that industry - BLATANT SELL OUT! Dick Cheney had about 16 million in Halliburton stock options - what are they worth now? Penobscot Bush was selling arms to the Nazis way after trade was restricted. BUSH the MOST corrupt family in politics! You did good, but you got 'em mixed up. -- JohnH "Opa of 6" |
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