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#1
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Funeral Home:
"Drive carefully. We'll wait." ***************************** On a Septic Tank Truck in Oregon: Yesterday's Meals on Wheels ***************************** On a Septic Tank Truck sign: "We're #1 in the #2 business." ************************** Sign over! a Gynecologist's Office: "Dr. Jones, at your cervix." ************************** At a Proctologist's door "To expedite your visit please back in." ************************** On a Plumber's truck: "We repair what your husband fixed." ************************** On a Plumber's truck: "Don't sleep with a drip. Call your plumber.." ************************** Pizza Shop Slogan: "7 days without pizza makes one weak." ************************** At a Tire Shop in Milwaukee: "Invite us to your next blowout." ************************** On a Plastic Surgeon's Office door: "Hello. Can we pick your nose?" ************************** At a Towing company: "We don't charge an arm and a leg. We want tows." ************************** On an Electrician's truck: "Let us remove your shorts." ************************** In a Nonsmoking Area: "If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action." ************************** On a Maternity Room door: "Push. Push. Push." ************************** At an Optometrist's Office "If you don't see what you're looking for, you've come to the right place." ************************** On a Taxidermist's window: "We really know our stuff." ************************** In a Podiatrist's office: "Time wounds all heels." ************************** On a Fence: "Salesmen welcome! Dog food is expensive." ************************** At a Car Dealership: "The best way to get back on your feet -- miss a car payment." ************************** At a Car Dealership "Customer walking In -- Is on the ankle express." ******************** Outside a Muffler Shop: "No appointment necessary. We hear you coming." ************************** In a Veterinarian's waiting room: "Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!" ************************** At the Electric Company: "We would be delighted if you send in your payment. However, if you don't, you will be." ************************** In a Restaurant window: "Don't stand there and be hungry, Come on in and get fed up." ************************** ************************** At a Propane Filling Station, "Thank heaven for little grills." ************************** And don't forget the sign at a Chicago Radiator Shop: "Best place in town to take a leak." ************************************* -- Not dead, in jail, or a slave? Thank a liberal! And don't forget to pay your taxes so the rich don't have to! |
#2
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Septic Tank Truck in FL (really!)
"Smells like money to us!" Harry Krause wrote: Funeral Home: "Drive carefully. We'll wait." ***************************** On a Septic Tank Truck in Oregon: Yesterday's Meals on Wheels ***************************** On a Septic Tank Truck sign: "We're #1 in the #2 business." ************************** Sign over! a Gynecologist's Office: "Dr. Jones, at your cervix." ************************** At a Proctologist's door "To expedite your visit please back in." ************************** On a Plumber's truck: "We repair what your husband fixed." ************************** On a Plumber's truck: "Don't sleep with a drip. Call your plumber.." ************************** Pizza Shop Slogan: "7 days without pizza makes one weak." ************************** At a Tire Shop in Milwaukee: "Invite us to your next blowout." ************************** On a Plastic Surgeon's Office door: "Hello. Can we pick your nose?" ************************** At a Towing company: "We don't charge an arm and a leg. We want tows." ************************** On an Electrician's truck: "Let us remove your shorts." ************************** In a Nonsmoking Area: "If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action." ************************** On a Maternity Room door: "Push. Push. Push." ************************** At an Optometrist's Office "If you don't see what you're looking for, you've come to the right place." ************************** On a Taxidermist's window: "We really know our stuff." ************************** In a Podiatrist's office: "Time wounds all heels." ************************** On a Fence: "Salesmen welcome! Dog food is expensive." ************************** At a Car Dealership: "The best way to get back on your feet -- miss a car payment." ************************** At a Car Dealership "Customer walking In -- Is on the ankle express." ******************** Outside a Muffler Shop: "No appointment necessary. We hear you coming." ************************** In a Veterinarian's waiting room: "Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!" ************************** At the Electric Company: "We would be delighted if you send in your payment. However, if you don't, you will be." ************************** In a Restaurant window: "Don't stand there and be hungry, Come on in and get fed up." ************************** ************************** At a Propane Filling Station, "Thank heaven for little grills." ************************** And don't forget the sign at a Chicago Radiator Shop: "Best place in town to take a leak." ************************************* |
#3
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Around 9/9/2004 4:20 PM, Dan Krueger wrote:
Septic Tank Truck in FL (really!) "Smells like money to us!" The motto on the sign of Roche Harbor's pumpout service boat, the "M/V Phecal Phreak": "We take crap from anybody!" (Disgusting, but on topic!) ![]() -- ~/Garth - 1966 Glastron V-142 Skiflite: "Blue-Boat" "There is nothing - absolutely nothing - half so much worth doing as simply messing about in boats." -Kenneth Grahame, The Wind in the Willows |
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