In agony I realized what
had happened. The hot water machine had sucked up a jellyfish and
pumped it into my suit.

Yeah well, the story might've been circulating for a while, but I've
actually been there, done that.

Stand-up jetski.
Mid-August afternoon (hot, in and out of the water) in 1998.
Shallow bay west of Delaware town of Dewey Beach.

I started to throttle up the jetski to give me enough momentum to pull
myself up onto it. To my horror I saw a cloud of small jellysfish in the
water just ahead of me. Here I am, dragging behind the jetski...

The impeller sucks up the jellyfish, chops 'em up and ejects them out the
nozzle... straight down my shorts, since I'm hangin' off the back trying to
build momentum.

Felt like someone tossed a running industrial belt sander into my pants, or
what I'd imagine that'd feel like...

I hung off the side, opened the throttle WIDE OPEN and headed straight out
for deeper water. Hung off the side with barely my nose above water in an
attempt to chill the UNBELIEAVABLE stinging. Took about a half-hour until
my buddies came out wondering what the heck I was doing. Heard the same
laughter.

Suffice to say I ain't going near a stand-up jetski again anytime soon.

-Bill Kearney