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-   -   Oz & Prunes = trouble (https://www.boatbanter.com/asa/27912-oz-prunes-%3D-trouble.html)

Joe February 7th 05 08:02 PM

Oz & Prunes = trouble
 
http://www.newsonline.com.au/0102200...es20022003.htm

Man's bowel explodes after eating entire carton of prunes

WHITE CLIFFS - A man is recovering in White Cliffs Hospital today after
a close call with a spontaneous combustion incident featuring his
bowel, prunes, and a deadly game of 'light the fart'.

Raymond Wise, 28, was accompanied by four male friends who had begun
drinking after the weather blew up and cancelled their fishing trip.

Jim Smith, 24, said the group had decided to "buy a box of beer" and
sit back while watching the men's tennis on television.

"While we were down the shops Ray dropped into a fruit shop and bought
an entire carton of prunes," Mr Smith said. "It only cost $10,
bargain."

Mr Smith said as the night crept on the men had turned to mixing their
drinks and noticed the foul odour drifting from Mr Wise's colon.

"He said if we struck a match it neutralises the smell, well one thing
led to another didn't it," he said.

At one stage Mr Wise was lighting his own puffs but as the game
progressed the others offered their services so Mr Wise "could
concentrate".

"Joe (Johnson) lit a match while Ray was bent over. His butt hole gaped
and for a while we thought he was going to dump on us, but then the
hole expanded and a bellow of gases gushed across Mr Johnson's hand,"
Mr Smith said.

The group collapsed into hysterics except for Johnson, who had a burnt
hand, and Wise, who was screaming in agony.

Johnson suffered minor burns to his right hand while Wise sustained
third degree burns to his colon and intestinal tract.

"This has really turned me off prunes for life," Mr Smith said.


katysails February 8th 05 02:19 AM

idiots abound the world over...

"Joe" wrote in message
oups.com...
http://www.newsonline.com.au/0102200...es20022003.htm

Man's bowel explodes after eating entire carton of prunes

WHITE CLIFFS - A man is recovering in White Cliffs Hospital today after
a close call with a spontaneous combustion incident featuring his
bowel, prunes, and a deadly game of 'light the fart'.

Raymond Wise, 28, was accompanied by four male friends who had begun
drinking after the weather blew up and cancelled their fishing trip.

Jim Smith, 24, said the group had decided to "buy a box of beer" and
sit back while watching the men's tennis on television.

"While we were down the shops Ray dropped into a fruit shop and bought
an entire carton of prunes," Mr Smith said. "It only cost $10,
bargain."

Mr Smith said as the night crept on the men had turned to mixing their
drinks and noticed the foul odour drifting from Mr Wise's colon.

"He said if we struck a match it neutralises the smell, well one thing
led to another didn't it," he said.

At one stage Mr Wise was lighting his own puffs but as the game
progressed the others offered their services so Mr Wise "could
concentrate".

"Joe (Johnson) lit a match while Ray was bent over. His butt hole gaped
and for a while we thought he was going to dump on us, but then the
hole expanded and a bellow of gases gushed across Mr Johnson's hand,"
Mr Smith said.

The group collapsed into hysterics except for Johnson, who had a burnt
hand, and Wise, who was screaming in agony.

Johnson suffered minor burns to his right hand while Wise sustained
third degree burns to his colon and intestinal tract.

"This has really turned me off prunes for life," Mr Smith said.




katysails February 8th 05 02:29 AM

how ablout drunken idiots?

OzOne wrote in message ...
On Tue, 08 Feb 2005 02:19:53 GMT, "katysails"
scribbled thusly:

idiots abound the world over...


I'd amend that to 'drunks'


Oz1...of the 3 twins.

I welcome you to crackerbox palace,We've been expecting you.




DSK February 8th 05 11:48 AM

katysails wrote:
how ablout drunken idiots?


They say that God takes care of idiots & drunks.... they're just playing
it safe, with double coverage

DSK



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