Democrat, Republican or Southern Republican?
 

With elections coming up, we should all decide.



How do you tell the difference between Democrats, Republicans and
Southern Republicans?

The answer can be found by posing the following question:



You're walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small
children. Suddenly, a dangerous looking man with a huge knife comes
around the corner. He locks eyes with you, screams obscenities,
raises the knife and charges. You are carrying a Glock .40, and you
are an expert shot. You have mere seconds before he reaches you and
your family. What do you do?



~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Democrat's Answer:



Well, that's not enough information to answer the question!

Does the man look poor or oppressed?

Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to attack?

Could we run away?

What does my wife think?

What about the kids?

Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock the knife out of
his hand?

What does the law say about this situation?

Does the Glock have appropriate safety built into it?

Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway and what kind of message does
this send to society and to my children?

Is it possible he'd be happy with just killing me?

Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be content just to
wound me?

If I were to grab his knees and hold on, could my family get away
while he was stabbing me?

Should I call 9-1-1?

Why is the street so deserted?

We need to raise taxes, have a paint and weed day and make this a
happier, healthier street that would discourage such behavior.

This is all so confusing!

I need to debate this with some friends for a few days and try to come
to a consensus.



~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Republican's Answer:



BANG!





~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Southern Republican's Answer:



BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! click... (sounds
of reloading)

BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! click

Daughter: "Nice grouping, Daddy: Were those the Winchester Silver
Tips?"


Joe

Democrat, Republican or Southern Republican?
 

You IDIOT! A real Democrat would simply ignore the intrusion and
keep going. Obviously the guy with the knife is after the Republican
who laid him off.

--
"j" ganz @@
www.sailnow.com

"Joe" wrote in message
m...
With elections coming up, we should all decide.



How do you tell the difference between Democrats, Republicans and
Southern Republicans?

The answer can be found by posing the following question:



You're walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small
children. Suddenly, a dangerous looking man with a huge knife comes
around the corner. He locks eyes with you, screams obscenities,
raises the knife and charges. You are carrying a Glock .40, and you
are an expert shot. You have mere seconds before he reaches you and
your family. What do you do?



~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Democrat's Answer:



Well, that's not enough information to answer the question!

Does the man look poor or oppressed?

Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to attack?

Could we run away?

What does my wife think?

What about the kids?

Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock the knife out of
his hand?

What does the law say about this situation?

Does the Glock have appropriate safety built into it?

Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway and what kind of message does
this send to society and to my children?

Is it possible he'd be happy with just killing me?

Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be content just to
wound me?

If I were to grab his knees and hold on, could my family get away
while he was stabbing me?

Should I call 9-1-1?

Why is the street so deserted?

We need to raise taxes, have a paint and weed day and make this a
happier, healthier street that would discourage such behavior.

This is all so confusing!

I need to debate this with some friends for a few days and try to come
to a consensus.



~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Republican's Answer:



BANG!





~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Southern Republican's Answer:



BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! click... (sounds
of reloading)

BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! click

Daughter: "Nice grouping, Daddy: Were those the Winchester Silver
Tips?"


Joe

Democrat, Republican or Southern Republican?
 

"Joe" wrote in message

With elections coming up, we should all decide.



How do you tell the difference between Democrats, Republicans and
Southern Republicans?

The answer can be found by posing the following question:



You're walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small
children. Suddenly, a dangerous looking man with a huge knife comes
around the corner. He locks eyes with you, screams obscenities,
raises the knife and charges. You are carrying a Glock .40, and you
are an expert shot. You have mere seconds before he reaches you and
your family. What do you do?



~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Democrat's Answer:



Well, that's not enough information to answer the question!

Does the man look poor or oppressed?

Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to attack?

Could we run away?

What does my wife think?

What about the kids?

Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock the knife out of
his hand?

What does the law say about this situation?

Does the Glock have appropriate safety built into it?

Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway and what kind of message does
this send to society and to my children?

Is it possible he'd be happy with just killing me?

Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be content just to
wound me?

If I were to grab his knees and hold on, could my family get away
while he was stabbing me?

Should I call 9-1-1?

Why is the street so deserted?

We need to raise taxes, have a paint and weed day and make this a
happier, healthier street that would discourage such behavior.

This is all so confusing!

I need to debate this with some friends for a few days and try to come
to a consensus.



~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Republican's Answer:



BANG!





~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Southern Republican's Answer:



BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! click... (sounds
of reloading)

BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! click

Daughter: "Nice grouping, Daddy: Were those the Winchester Silver
Tips?"

"No, Sweetie, they were semi-wadcutters. Think I should reload and shoot
him some more just to be sure?"

Max

Democrat, Republican or Southern Republican?
 

"Maxprop" wrote in message hlink.net...
"Joe" wrote in message

With elections coming up, we should all decide.



How do you tell the difference between Democrats, Republicans and
Southern Republicans?

The answer can be found by posing the following question:



You're walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small
children. Suddenly, a dangerous looking man with a huge knife comes
around the corner. He locks eyes with you, screams obscenities,
raises the knife and charges. You are carrying a Glock .40, and you
are an expert shot. You have mere seconds before he reaches you and
your family. What do you do?



~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Democrat's Answer:



Well, that's not enough information to answer the question!

Does the man look poor or oppressed?

Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to attack?

Could we run away?

What does my wife think?

What about the kids?

Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock the knife out of
his hand?

What does the law say about this situation?

Does the Glock have appropriate safety built into it?

Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway and what kind of message does
this send to society and to my children?

Is it possible he'd be happy with just killing me?

Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be content just to
wound me?

If I were to grab his knees and hold on, could my family get away
while he was stabbing me?

Should I call 9-1-1?

Why is the street so deserted?

We need to raise taxes, have a paint and weed day and make this a
happier, healthier street that would discourage such behavior.

This is all so confusing!

I need to debate this with some friends for a few days and try to come
to a consensus.



~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Republican's Answer:



BANG!





~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Southern Republican's Answer:



BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! click... (sounds
of reloading)

BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! click

Daughter: "Nice grouping, Daddy: Were those the Winchester Silver
Tips?"

"No, Sweetie, they were semi-wadcutters. Think I should reload and shoot
him some more just to be sure?"

Max

Close Max, but wrong, see the click on the last line of sound effects?
Any Southern republican always keeps his gun loaded.

Joe

Democrat, Republican or Southern Republican?
 

Joe wrote:
Close Max, but wrong, see the click on the last line of sound effects?
Any Southern republican always keeps his gun loaded.

Whereas a Southern Democrat is smart enough to keep track of how many
shots he's fired.

DSK

Democrat, Republican or Southern Republican?
 

"Jonathan Ganz" wrote in message ...
You IDIOT! A real Democrat would simply ignore the intrusion and
keep going.

Going to a grave maybe.



Obviously the guy with the knife is after the Republican
who laid him off.

He must be a democrat huh? I mean he is laid off, a scumball blaming
his own laziness on someone else, and expecting someone else to pay
for his uselessness and unwillingness and inability to keep his job.
Yeah I bet he is burning mad at a republican that cut his welfare
check, that fired him because he was in the bottom 5% of preformers
were he worked, and totally got tired of supporting a useless bum.
Yelp sounds like he's a typical welfare loser that went over the edge
because he couldent cut it and pull his own weight. Typical republican
hater.

I see your point, thanks.


Joe


--
"j" ganz @@
www.sailnow.com

"Joe" wrote in message
m...
With elections coming up, we should all decide.



How do you tell the difference between Democrats, Republicans and
Southern Republicans?

The answer can be found by posing the following question:



You're walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small
children. Suddenly, a dangerous looking man with a huge knife comes
around the corner. He locks eyes with you, screams obscenities,
raises the knife and charges. You are carrying a Glock .40, and you
are an expert shot. You have mere seconds before he reaches you and
your family. What do you do?



~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Democrat's Answer:



Well, that's not enough information to answer the question!

Does the man look poor or oppressed?

Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to attack?

Could we run away?

What does my wife think?

What about the kids?

Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock the knife out of
his hand?

What does the law say about this situation?

Does the Glock have appropriate safety built into it?

Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway and what kind of message does
this send to society and to my children?

Is it possible he'd be happy with just killing me?

Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be content just to
wound me?

If I were to grab his knees and hold on, could my family get away
while he was stabbing me?

Should I call 9-1-1?

Why is the street so deserted?

We need to raise taxes, have a paint and weed day and make this a
happier, healthier street that would discourage such behavior.

This is all so confusing!

I need to debate this with some friends for a few days and try to come
to a consensus.



~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Republican's Answer:



BANG!





~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Southern Republican's Answer:



BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! click... (sounds
of reloading)

BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! click

Daughter: "Nice grouping, Daddy: Were those the Winchester Silver
Tips?"


Joe

Democrat, Republican or Southern Republican?
 

You forget... Democrats are non-violent wimps. Therefore, the guy
with the knife must either be a Republican or a Libertarian.

The Republican also laid him off... business is business. Forget about
the mentally handicaped. Put them on the street. Forget about welfare
and a helping hand. Give him a knife. Better yet, make guns cheap
and easy to get.

The Democrat ignores him because there's nothing that can be done.
He/She believes in the greater good, that even in death (if that's what
it comes to), might doesn't make right.

The Democrat and the knife-wielding Republican/Libertarian goes
to Heaven; whereas, the Republican business person who laid him
off goes in the other direction. But, the good news is that it's better
to rule in Hell than serve in Heaven.

Now do you see my points Joe?

--
"j" ganz @@
www.sailnow.com

"Joe" wrote in message
om...
"Jonathan Ganz" wrote in message
...
You IDIOT! A real Democrat would simply ignore the intrusion and
keep going.

Going to a grave maybe.



Obviously the guy with the knife is after the Republican
who laid him off.

He must be a democrat huh? I mean he is laid off, a scumball blaming
his own laziness on someone else, and expecting someone else to pay
for his uselessness and unwillingness and inability to keep his job.
Yeah I bet he is burning mad at a republican that cut his welfare
check, that fired him because he was in the bottom 5% of preformers
were he worked, and totally got tired of supporting a useless bum.
Yelp sounds like he's a typical welfare loser that went over the edge
because he couldent cut it and pull his own weight. Typical republican
hater.

I see your point, thanks.


Joe


--
"j" ganz @@
www.sailnow.com

"Joe" wrote in message
m...
With elections coming up, we should all decide.



How do you tell the difference between Democrats, Republicans and
Southern Republicans?

The answer can be found by posing the following question:



You're walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small
children. Suddenly, a dangerous looking man with a huge knife comes
around the corner. He locks eyes with you, screams obscenities,
raises the knife and charges. You are carrying a Glock .40, and you
are an expert shot. You have mere seconds before he reaches you and
your family. What do you do?



~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Democrat's Answer:



Well, that's not enough information to answer the question!

Does the man look poor or oppressed?

Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to attack?

Could we run away?

What does my wife think?

What about the kids?

Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock the knife out of
his hand?

What does the law say about this situation?

Does the Glock have appropriate safety built into it?

Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway and what kind of message does
this send to society and to my children?

Is it possible he'd be happy with just killing me?

Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be content just to
wound me?

If I were to grab his knees and hold on, could my family get away
while he was stabbing me?

Should I call 9-1-1?

Why is the street so deserted?

We need to raise taxes, have a paint and weed day and make this a
happier, healthier street that would discourage such behavior.

This is all so confusing!

I need to debate this with some friends for a few days and try to come
to a consensus.



~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Republican's Answer:



BANG!





~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Southern Republican's Answer:



BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! click... (sounds
of reloading)

BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! click

Daughter: "Nice grouping, Daddy: Were those the Winchester Silver
Tips?"


Joe